I used to be a huge fan of Home Improvement. Not my own home, not even close. Like I've ever lifted a finger to improve anything. Nope, just a fan of Tim the Tool man who revolutionized the whole "really good at fixing things" but accident prone enough to make it funny. I loved all … Continue reading Directionally Challenged
Humor
Bitter Food
I have had a long standing relationship with food. Ever since I was a baby I required it. I'm not really sure what it has ever done for me, but for some reason I keep eating it. It is this weird thing like how humans need trees and trees need humans. I'm not sure I … Continue reading Bitter Food
Thief of Joy
I take a lot away from people around me. That includes all those people that read this blog, who are few. I would like to say that I'm kind of the Midas of Bitterness. Everything I touch turns to bitterness. So, of course, that happens to everyone I meet or talk to. In the same … Continue reading Thief of Joy
I have discipline – I can not Binge watch Netflix
Some people think they have discipline because they can make run 26.something miles and not die. Some people have discipline because they can make it through a whole work week and not complain about it. Others think they have willpower because they can not eat meat, or gluten. I guess I don't have willpower then. … Continue reading I have discipline – I can not Binge watch Netflix
Sherman Tank Bitter Friday Giftures
We have been working on getting into a house for a little while, because you know, it's nice to live in a place where you get to control the heat and the TV and can send the kids into the backyard or their room so they can leave you alone. Anyways, we decided to … Continue reading Sherman Tank Bitter Friday Giftures
A-cord-ing to who?
For Christmas, I got pretty much everything I wanted except a new computer, a new TV, a new phone, a vacation to Hawaii, a cruise to Alaska, a new car, and a new house. Seems like people are pretty insensitive to others needs this time of year. Season of giving my butt. They say to … Continue reading A-cord-ing to who?
New Year’s Changes
I've never been a huge fan of New Year's. Ever since I was young, until whatever day it was yesterday, I have never really done anything for New Year's. I'm an introvert so I've never really liked to party. I'm a very uninteresting person, so I just like to watch TV, or play video games … Continue reading New Year’s Changes
Growing Corn Friday Giftures
I was born in Southern California close to a tiny town called Los Angeles and lived there for 6 years during, you know, my formative years. Then we moved to the New York area, an even smaller podunk town called NYC. Luckily, we got out of those lands of opportunity and moved to South … Continue reading Growing Corn Friday Giftures
Shiny, Happy People
Here I am stuck at work, again during the holidays. I don't know what it takes to get a gig where you get the entire holiday off scott free (I guess you have to be a teacher or a pint sized human person), but I need to figure that thing out. Maybe the whole not … Continue reading Shiny, Happy People
Boom Roast Extras
Instant feedback is kind of a thing now a days. Each of us are now little businesses and personal brands and everything we do and say get instant analytics. We post a picture of our family and we get likes. We listen to a song on Spotify at work and all our friends that follow … Continue reading Boom Roast Extras
Howling at the Moon Bitter Friday Giftures
I wouldn't say that I'm Harry Potter, but around this time of year, I definitely get hairy. It's not so much that I'm lazy(just kidding I am), it's just that I don't feel like shaving. For some reason my teeth get a little sharper too. Maybe it is all those sugar cookies, that my … Continue reading Howling at the Moon Bitter Friday Giftures
Dome for the holidays
Over the 5 years I've been doing this blog, I've learned nothing. Though, I think it is pretty safe to say that no matter what you say, someone will be offended by what you say. You talk about Father's Day, someone chews you up and spits you out. Talk bad about cats, someone tells you … Continue reading Dome for the holidays
1000 Posts Weak
I am really good at starting things. I wrote the first draft of a novel, still in the middle of 2-17 drafts that are required to get published. I started wrapping my wife's gift for Christmas..., oh crap she is here. Hold on a minute.... Okay, that was close. I hid it in the basement … Continue reading 1000 Posts Weak
Want a little action?
It is my goal to take over this world of kindness and make it a little more bitter everyday. It’s not easy with all the happy, positive and upbeat people in this world. But it is a battle that I continue to fight, no matter how fruitless it gets. Thankfully, every once in a while, I register on other blogger’s mind and will get a little nibble on other bloggers posts. After a long time, I finally got one and I can’t help but not reblog someone who wrote about me. Whenever bitterness is spread even a little bit, it should be rewarded. So here you go, Cyranny.
I long told myself that I would never, ever be pretentious enough to give new bloggers advices, or worse, be pompous to the point I would feel like I can help established bloggers…
You thought I was about to say that I changed my mind, right? Mouahahahahahaah Nope! I am in no position to tell anybody what to do in order to have a successful blog. I am not even sure what “having a successful blog” means yet.
But I think I know how to have fun blogging, and in that regard, I feel very comfortable giving out some of my tricks. It’s free, and the worst that could happen would be you not having fun too, right? No big risk there.
No doubt you’ll all agree that “likes” are pleasant. But most bloggers will appreciate more feedback, in the form of comments. I don’t comment all the posts I…
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Quick and Easy Meals for under $1000 Friday Giftures
I'm all about that simplicity. And that bass. I know when you are hungry and you just need something quick for your family, time is of the essence. Well, sign up for the Bitter Ben quick meal program and we will find a way to get you some food within the next 8 hours, … Continue reading Quick and Easy Meals for under $1000 Friday Giftures
Lazy Musicians
Music and I go way back. All the way back to the 80's when Micheal J. Fox was busy time machining to our time, and Sting was following Every Breath We Took. One of my earliest memories was when Friday Night Videos came on TV and I saw Micheal Jackson tell me to Beat It. … Continue reading Lazy Musicians
Kohl’s Cash is the Devil
There has been a lot of talk about money in the news lately. At least I think so, because I don't really have the news on TV, so everything I get is from Youtube, Facebook, Twitter, Wikipedia, and Ben's Bitter Blog. I guess BitterCoin is a thing making headlines for all the money it seems … Continue reading Kohl’s Cash is the Devil
Loss of Interest
I remember when I was a kid and my dad helped me sign up for my first checking account. After doing my favorite thing ever, looking for a job, and going through dozens of job applications, I finally got my dream job of flattening dough at Little Caesar's Pizza. Not only did I get to … Continue reading Loss of Interest
Pallet Jackass
First of all, I am so sad that I wasn’t here to record this. Not only would I have been able to post it to YouTube and become an internet millionaire, but more importantly, I would have been able to cut it up and make it into a gif and put it on my Bitter Friday Giftures. Why do I always miss all the fun accidents on my camera? I have the worst timing! ARRRRGGGGHHHHH!
This is also going in my report:
Admit it, you’ve been there. That place where you’ve had a moment of boredom of work and you’ve dealt with it by doing something outside the rules. Nothing necessarily illegal. Not necessarily dishonest conduct. But something a little bit naughty to break up the monotony of the day. Something that will cause someone in a high visibility vest and a clipboard under his arm to say “This is going in my report”.
One time in a factory there were pallet jacks for hauling large loads around the premises. Not one of those new-fangled automated ones that you could walk alongside while holding a button. I’m talking old school. One that had to be pushed manually. From time to time workers were known to make the return trip on an empty trolley if the floor had a gentle slope just like riding a scooter…
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Let’s Play Jeopardy Friday Giftures
So I have a Jeopardy question for you. Oh, wait they don't do questions. Well too bad. I do things differently around here. So suck, it Trabek. Do you know what the Sunshine State is? If you guessed Florida, you are right. And probably from there. But did you also know that unofficially it is … Continue reading Let’s Play Jeopardy Friday Giftures