Bitter Haunted Houses

It's that bitter time of the year where stinky little goblins dressed up as kids dressed up as hoodlums start invading neighborhoods and asking for free candy. Holding their little pillowcases out, saying Trick or Treat. They are trying to get something from my good candy stash, but I know better than that. I always … Continue reading Bitter Haunted Houses

Bitter Bending Machines Friday Giftures

  Vending machines are way of life for many. People are so busy with their stupid jobs or running from work to school to practice to the grocery store to practice to home, that they don't have time to sit down and eat a meal. Well, it's like that for all of you, I assume.  … Continue reading Bitter Bending Machines Friday Giftures

My Bitter Exotic Travel

Judging by all the things I've been talking about doing lately, you probably think I've been working really hard. You know, like sitting in the stands watching football, or sitting in class pretending to pay attention with my eyes closed. Or sitting in a study area, pretending to type papers, or sitting in our van … Continue reading My Bitter Exotic Travel

Bitter Rivalry of the Week – Nephew vs. Nephew I've talked a lot about football lately, which is kind of crazy to me, because I only have a passing interest in it.  I enjoy watching the long pass plays, but you know the thing about football? Pro football is owned by billionaires, played my millionaires, and fantasy played by thousandaires. I get them … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week – Nephew vs. Nephew

Scary Season Friday Giftures

  According to my daughter, we are in spooky season. It's kind of funny that she seems to like it so much considering that she is afraid of just about everything. But hey, aren't we all? Afraid of rejection, and fear itself and hair in our food? If it wasn't for all of the stuff … Continue reading Scary Season Friday Giftures

Humans are not meant to work in groups

Let's say you are on an African safari. You know, when you can scrape together $5000 for a trip. Let's say you actually remembered your binoculars too. So you pull out those new $200 pair of binoculars on your Safari and you see a pack of lions far enough away that they can't reasonably catch … Continue reading Humans are not meant to work in groups

Birthday Bitterness Friday Giftures

  Once again another birthday came and went and I got nothing. I don't know what everyone's problem is, but I'm getting a little sick of my son having a birthday and no one getting me any presents. It's kind of selfish that everyone pays attention to him and not me all day. I mean … Continue reading Birthday Bitterness Friday Giftures

Bitter Viral Post

I'm not sure why so many people are going to share this post, because the content is just terrible. It's not funny or inspirational or worth anyone's time, but for some reason you want to share it with your friends. It has nothing to do with the fact that I am hypnotizing you, because I … Continue reading Bitter Viral Post

The Prodigal Son Returns Friday Giftures

  They say absence makes the heart grows fonder and most of the time that totally isn't true. Think about it, when you leave your co-workers, do you miss them so bad that you forgo any of your weekend plans to be with them? If you do, you should probably get another job, because you … Continue reading The Prodigal Son Returns Friday Giftures

The Bitter 800th Post Club

Math. Mathematics. Adding. Subtracting. Multiplying. Dividing. I just did a collective yawn for all of you just now, just to show you how boring that was. Yeah, maybe I did that from my couch or between doing my homework(yawn again!), but any way you slice it, math is sooo boring. And only useful if you … Continue reading The Bitter 800th Post Club

Bitter Ben Branding

I've been paying way too much attention in class which is kind of disappointing because I thought I would come to this school and just slide right into my old freshman year habits, which was sleep in all the time, play pranks on the other dorm hall and flunk classes with my sunglasses on. Apparently … Continue reading Bitter Ben Branding