End Game Bitterness

  I am trying to think of a theme for my Bitter Friday Giftures, but right now all I can think about is the Avenger's Endgame. I am not going to be able to see it this weekend, because of things, but I know that most people will. That is about a billion people I … Continue reading End Game Bitterness

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Down The Rabbit Hole Bitterness

The best part about the place where we live, is we don't have to do any yard work. It's nice not only because we are old and our backs are giving out, but because our son is lazy and would want money to do it. At our old house in Seattle, we had a pretty … Continue reading Down The Rabbit Hole Bitterness

Are you a Bozo Bitterness

When I was younger and really bored I used to watch WGN in Chicago. In the mornings, they had this show that included Bozo the Clown and he would have kids on the show. They had this game that challenged kids to throw ping pongs into big buckets and the farther they went, the better … Continue reading Are you a Bozo Bitterness

Cloning Dogs Bitter Friday Giftures

  My wife just popped in and told me that people have way too much money. Obviously, I agreed and told her that we were on the opposite end of the scale, IE, we have way too little. I then asked her why she said that, and she said that some family paid $50,000 to … Continue reading Cloning Dogs Bitter Friday Giftures

46 Reasons To Be Bitter

As is tradition on this Bitter Blog O' Mine, I celebrate the birth of bitterness so many years ago by listing on this blog 46 reasons to be bitter, one for every year of my bitter life. It's a fairly easy thing because let's be honest, everything in the world makes me bitter. And since … Continue reading 46 Reasons To Be Bitter

April Foolish Bitter Friday Giftures

  If you guys have followed the blog for a while, you probably know that I have always done an April Fools joke every year. Some fairly good, other's awful and this year, well, it wasn't very good, but apparently most of you fell for it anyways. I did not ever get a tweet from … Continue reading April Foolish Bitter Friday Giftures

Dwight Shrute Bitterness

As you all should know, I am a huge fan of The Office. Ever since I saw the episode where the people of Dunder Mifflin Scranton go to the lake for the Beach Games while Michael sneakily tries to pick his replacement, I was hooked. My favorite part was when Dwight picks his team and … Continue reading Dwight Shrute Bitterness

Rubik’s Cube Bitterness

I grew up in the 80's, which was a very colorful time. We moved from New York to South Dakota right as the country was transitioning from disco to MTV. Micheal Jackson was at the peak of his powers, and I was finally starting to become a human (I don't remember much before I was … Continue reading Rubik’s Cube Bitterness

Seven Years Bitter Luck

I'm usually pretty terrible at remembering anniversaries, which is why I decided to get married in 2000, so I would always know how many years I've been married. It has been pretty foolproof, and the end of summer date is also good, so we can always go on a chill date, while we make fun … Continue reading Seven Years Bitter Luck

New Kids on the Block Bitter Friday Giftures

  In the background, I'm listening to the New Kids on the Block doing their best to make a comeback. I don't deny old people trying to make a comeback as I'm attempting to do right now, but at least they need to rebrand and call themselves Older Dudes on the Clock or something. One … Continue reading New Kids on the Block Bitter Friday Giftures

Bitter Vacation Absence

I was reading this article about a guy that works for Nintendo. He is the creator of Super Smash Bros., one of Nintendo's most popular games. I don't know if it mentioned how old he was, but this guy has an insane passion for working on this game. Basically it has been his life's work … Continue reading Bitter Vacation Absence

Bitter Business Bureau

When we moved into this house about a year ago, we had to furnish it. Of course, we got the most important things first, the couch, TV, and fridge, which I have spent the most amount of time using. I guess we also got a table, our old furniture, and bed, but those weren't really … Continue reading Bitter Business Bureau

Marching into Bitter Friday Giftures

  I don't know about all of you, but February is both way too short and way too long. When watching the news all I keep hearing about is how much snow and bad weather everyone is getting (despite the fact that the Groundhog said winter was over) and terrible news about the government. I … Continue reading Marching into Bitter Friday Giftures

Sponsored Dreams

I've got a lot of dreams in my life. Becoming a YouTube star. Becoming a professional video gamer. Winning the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes $5000 a week for life winner. Getting the most comfortable couch ever and laying in it for extended periods of time. Getting a pizza oven in my house. Learning how to make … Continue reading Sponsored Dreams

Bitter Mode

  Some people probably think that I am a robot programmed for the one-dimensional purpose of being bitter. Part of that is true. I am a robot. And I am programmed for bitterness. But, there are actually many different subtle dimensions to my bitterness. I am programmed to behave differently in the traffic environment than … Continue reading Bitter Mode

BitterTine’s Day Bitter Friday Giftures

  I was talking to my wife the other day and I was comparing the days of the week to the months of the year. For the most part, it makes sense. January is definitely like Monday. Everyone is hungover from the holidays and the bitterness of family and togetherness and rage of the weekend … Continue reading BitterTine’s Day Bitter Friday Giftures

Bitter News from the Couch #8

Yes, it is Sunday afternoon and you have nothing else to do. TV is getting old and you are tired of the kids. Escape to the computer room so you can watch the news. But not the same, boring, dull stuff that you keep seeing on your computer screen, but the entertaining, yet bitter news … Continue reading Bitter News from the Couch #8

Nine Lives Bitter Friday Giftures

  Most of the time the only reason I follow the news is when I do research for my Bitter News from the Couch. And I only follow the stories that make sense to make fun of. When I woke up this morning, my wife told me about a story I absolutely needed to write … Continue reading Nine Lives Bitter Friday Giftures

Mighty Morphin Bitter Rangers

As you saw from my lazy post yesterday, I fancy myself as an amateur filmmaker. I admit I'm a horrible actor, for many reasons. Let's take a moment to list those reasons. 1. I have a monotone voice. 2. I have a face for blogging. 3. I can't memorize a single line. 4. I have … Continue reading Mighty Morphin Bitter Rangers