Stealth Arts Bitter Friday Giftures

Besides the candy part, I've never been a big fan of Halloween. The part I like least is the dressing up. If I was good at making and wearing costumes, I could be making big bucks doing cosplay and going to conventions like Comic-con, or PAX. Maybe it's the fact that wearing uncomfortable, hot, sweaty … Continue reading Stealth Arts Bitter Friday Giftures

Difficulty Settings Bitter Friday Giftures

I used to be young. When I was that, I used to be really good at video games. There was this Mega Man game that I played once and really liked it and when screenshots of Mega Man 2 came out, I was just floored. At the time, they were bleeding edge graphics and I … Continue reading Difficulty Settings Bitter Friday Giftures

Mayonnaise Packet Bitter Friday Giftures

As an ardent video gamer and human being, I'm very familiar with what gamers like to call a "fetch quest". If you are not familiar, it's basically the way a game will extend a mission, make a game longer. In real life, it's just a way of making your life more frustrating. The definition is … Continue reading Mayonnaise Packet Bitter Friday Giftures

Treadmill Bitter Friday Giftures

Yesterday, I had just arrived at my gym parking lot, when my wife called. So I had to do the most amount of multitasking I could possibly do, which was walking and talking on the phone at the same time. By the time I got to the treadmill we were still talking, so I had … Continue reading Treadmill Bitter Friday Giftures

The Simulation Bitter Friday Giftures

You know the movie Free Guy with Ryan Reynolds is coming out today right? Since Ryan wasn't able to sponsor this blog post because of his ties to Mint Mobile, I'm going to sponsor it myself. Unfortunately, my bank account is being drained by these three people who are squatting in my house (they keep … Continue reading The Simulation Bitter Friday Giftures

Underground Lair Bitter Friday Giftures

We've all lost a lot in the pandemic. Lost lives, lost jobs, lost businesses, lost freedoms and lost breathing (you know from those dang masks). All I know is that I've never wearing one of those things again. I've personally lost a lot of things since the pandemic started too. I'm still missing one of … Continue reading Underground Lair Bitter Friday Giftures

Famous Relatives Bitter Friday Giftures

Fun Fact: I am in the movie Jaws. Not as an actor, no as in my name. And it might be at one of the scariest parts. If you don't believe me, watch this... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDs5a0BcEzY Other than this obscure fact about my name is in the first ever summer blockbuster, and the runaway success of … Continue reading Famous Relatives Bitter Friday Giftures

Messenger Boy Bitter Friday Giftures

I've had a few jobs in my days as a person. The first one I had was a back yard maintenance crewperson for a Midwestern bank executive and his wife. They provided room and board from ages 0 to 18. Sometimes they would pay me $10 for the lawn mowing. Sometimes they would hug me, … Continue reading Messenger Boy Bitter Friday Giftures

Gum Confident Bitter Friday Giftures

I was one of the last people to watch a movie in a theater before the pandemic thing started 5 years ago. I remember it so clearly, because it was March 13th, maybe a couple of days after the NBA shut down. It was on Friday the 13th and the theater had maybe 6 people … Continue reading Gum Confident Bitter Friday Giftures

The Bitter Spouse that Nobody Likes

It's weird how when I was growing up, I didn't hear much about illnesses other than colds, flus and maybe typhoid fever. Probably because as a kid, I hadn't started a job, had kids myself, or learned about debt, taxes and death. But as soon as I started experiencing real stress, like making sure I … Continue reading The Bitter Spouse that Nobody Likes

Road Trippin Bitter Friday Giftures

The road trip movie is a standard Hollywood movie right of passage. Besides a couple of exceptions, (Vacation, Tommy Boy, Dumb and Dumber) they are pretty formulaic and kind of an excuse for terrible and absurd things to happen. Then at the end of the horrific trip, the participants are supposed to have learned something … Continue reading Road Trippin Bitter Friday Giftures

Gas Station Bitter Friday Giftures

For all six of you who follow me regularly, you might have noticed that I was MIA last week. That's because I was sequestered by my company to go on a long business trip. You might think that it would have been a fun trip because I was flying first class with hot towel and … Continue reading Gas Station Bitter Friday Giftures

Masterclass Bitter Friday Giftures

You know that college is pretty useless right? Don't believe me? Just take a look at just two examples I have, both in my own family, and I will prove it. (Isn't that what science teaches us? That we have to prove things?) First example is me. I went dutifully for 5 years to college. … Continue reading Masterclass Bitter Friday Giftures

Pain in the Neck Bitter Friday Giftures

My neck has done some heavy lifting throughout my life. And not by choice. By obligation. It's connected my low functioning brain connected to rest of me. It's done a lot of swiveling back and forth between two computer screens and been pushed back and forth on roller coasters. It's been shaved thousands of time … Continue reading Pain in the Neck Bitter Friday Giftures

Failing Vision Bitter Friday Giftures

I'm pretty bitter about my vision. You see, from about my sophomore year in high school until I was 33, I wore glasses. I tried contacts once, but I wasn't a fan of sticking things in my eye and lost the desire for them really fast. Then, as a gift for me living and taking … Continue reading Failing Vision Bitter Friday Giftures

Cancellation Bitterness

When I was growing up, I watched a lot of TV. My favorite cartoon was Transformers, but I watched a lot of different show. I would always get really excited about some and then in the summer, I would recognize that they would start showing reruns of the shows I already watched, and I would … Continue reading Cancellation Bitterness

5G Bitter Friday Giftures

There was a story in the news yesterday and today about a person who won $26 million in lottery. That would be a happy day right? Most of the time, yes. Unfortunately, there was a tiny little problem. The winner didn't turn in the ticket...and then didn't turn in the ticket...and then forgot to turn … Continue reading 5G Bitter Friday Giftures

Funny Bitter Friday Giftures

This week I got a surprise call from a former co-worker who I would always commiserate with about what freaking idiots we worked with, and how we were always going find a way out of the prison that we worked at. I couldn't get out of the job, because I didn't think I had any … Continue reading Funny Bitter Friday Giftures