Sometimes, I wonder if the greatest invention ever for an introvert has already been invented. They have been with me through all the bitter trials in my life. They've helped me ignore concourses of overwhelming extroverts, helped me look busy and focused at work, and given me excuses for not hearing what important people … Continue reading Headphones Friday Bitter Giftures
Fiction
What does your work computer do on weekends?
I guess there are some people out there that love work so much, that they work weekends, even though they don't have to. I should know. My wife watches Hallmark movies, and that is the MO of every single bad boyfriend on that network. There are only 3 script types at Hallmark. Script number 1B … Continue reading What does your work computer do on weekends?
DNA Test Bitterness
When I was a sophomore in high school, we had to take Biology. I couldn't stand my teacher, because he was a pig before the #metoo movement started, but also he wasn't very good at teaching. I remember him talking about the weirdest things like you should change your deodorant often because the glands under … Continue reading DNA Test Bitterness
Running on a Treadmill Bitter Friday Giftures
Whatever you do, don't go to the doctor. You think you are just going there for a routine check or to get some pills so they can just easily cure you. Turns out that isn't the case. They grilled me about everything that was wrong with me, and boy was there everything wrong with … Continue reading Running on a Treadmill Bitter Friday Giftures
Weening off Bitter Friday Giftures
I've never been big into using long names for people. I've always been a nickname person. For each of my siblings, my wife and kids - I have nicknames for all of them. Who needs to call someone their long name? That requires so much effort. I even go by my short name. Can … Continue reading Weening off Bitter Friday Giftures
Mustard Seed Bitterness
I'm a very picky eater. I don't know if it was because when I was growing up, I really just liked peanut butter sandwiches, and cereal and no one ever forced me to try anything new, or if it was my tongue that exclusively likes the bitter taste. I'm pretty much like Mikey from the … Continue reading Mustard Seed Bitterness
Editing Bitterness
via GIPHY I've been doing a whole lot of editing lately, and not of the written word. I'm really bad at that, even though my wife thinks I'm really good at it. She always makes me edit my kid's papers. The problem is that their teachers start to believe that my kids are … Continue reading Editing Bitterness
Spooky Story Bitter Friday Giftures
I've never been big into the spooky part of Halloween. I will occasionally visit a haunted house or watch a scary movie, but they don't really define the season for me. It isn't those corn mazes or pumpkins that seem to pop up overnight in every field, henhouse, doghouse, and backyard. It isn't the … Continue reading Spooky Story Bitter Friday Giftures
Free Time Bitter Friday Giftures
When you are younger all you want is for people to pay attention to you. Feed me, cuddle me, give me toys, take me to the park. When you get older and can feed yourself, get all the cuddling you can handle from your kids, get all the toys you really want, and can't … Continue reading Free Time Bitter Friday Giftures
Got any games on your Phone Bitterness
My kids are always alerting me of the latest memes, as if I wasn't 100% in on all of them. Honestly, I think my kids speak meme, because 90% of what comes out of their mouths refer to some meme or another. I try to be in the know so I can talk to them, … Continue reading Got any games on your Phone Bitterness
Car Investigative Report Bitter Friday Giftures
When we wake up to get ready for school/work, we turn on the news. I despise most news because it is all just a bunch of politics and bad news about murder and court appearances and such. But every once in a while, a news story comes along where you can just make fun … Continue reading Car Investigative Report Bitter Friday Giftures
Hardest Working Appliance
I assume all of you have seen Toy Story before, so I hope I'm not spoiling it all for you. In it, they answer the question, "What do my toys do when no one is around?" Then there are those Secret Lives of Pets movies that explore a similar question. "What do my pets do … Continue reading Hardest Working Appliance
Harry Bitter Friday Giftures
I was watching Harry Potter last night and it reminded me of something spooky. No, not witches and wizards or Horcruxes or Voldemort. It reminded me of something I did just yesterday. I didn't like my haircut, so I fixed it myself. My hair is already bad enough, but then letting myself hack it … Continue reading Harry Bitter Friday Giftures
John Wick Bitterness
I've never understood the Phone wars (Samsung v. Iphone) or the mobile network wars (T-Mobile v. ATT v. Verizon v. Sprint). At this point all of them are pretty much the same and do about the same thing. I think they all pretty much suck at phone calls (which is fine because I don't call … Continue reading John Wick Bitterness
Venmo Bitter Friday Giftures
There is a social media app out there that I think many of you are missing out on. On the surface you might think that Venmo is just another way to pay people without actually paying them, you would be wrong. In fact, if you are on Instagram mostly just to look at other … Continue reading Venmo Bitter Friday Giftures
Tennis Match Bitterness
Back in the day when computers first came out, one of the first video games that came out was a game called Pong. I was a little too young, so I didn't really understand "computer games", but apparently it was a BIG thing. It was very similar to tennis and if you know anything about … Continue reading Tennis Match Bitterness
Short Week Bitter Friday Giftures
Remember all the way back to Monday? Remember how most of us had Labor Day off? It seems like so long ago but we decided not to labor ironically. The reason why it seems so long ago, is because of this weird phenomenon where those shorter weeks we get from holidays seem longer because … Continue reading Short Week Bitter Friday Giftures
3 PM Afternoon Crash Bitter Friday Giftures
Based on recent trends, or maybe just what I've noticed, I think the human body seems to naturally shut down around 3 pm. I assume most people, like me have finished their really important work by 10 am, had lunch by 12 or 1 pm and are just biding their time until 5 pm. … Continue reading 3 PM Afternoon Crash Bitter Friday Giftures
Bitter Dream House
Most of the spring and summer when I was unemployed, I dreamed up different ways to pay the bills. Most of them involved the lottery, Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes or starting a very successful YouTube channel. They were all long shots, but at the time, so was getting an interview that would actually seem like a … Continue reading Bitter Dream House
Burning Man Bitter Friday Giftures
Humans aren't very good at learning lessons. I should know, I'm one of them. You would think that after living in my house for over a year now, I would have figured out that the glasses are in one cabinet, and plates are in another, but I continually reach for the wrong one almost … Continue reading Burning Man Bitter Friday Giftures
