Hello from Seattle, where in a days time, the whole city will be rioting. Either because the Seahawks won the Super Bowl, or because they didn't. Or they because the grass is too green in the downtown parks or because the mandatory 5th break per hour isn't being honored by the union, or because some … Continue reading How to Have a Super Bitter Bowl
Month: January 2015
Bitter Abandonment Giftures
Abandon hope all ye that read stuff on here. Just like my writing skills have abandoned me this week, so should you abandon your desks and workstations and computers and find bitterness in your cars, trains, planes, moped, skiis, snowboards, apparating or Time Machine Deloreans. Go home and grab some chips, soda, bar-b-q sauce, wings, … Continue reading Bitter Abandonment Giftures
Bitter Modes
Some people probably think that I am a robot programmed for the one dimensional purpose of being bitter. Part of that is true. I am a robot. And I am programmed for bitterness. But, there are actually many different subtle dimensions to my bitterness. I am programmed to behave differently in the traffic environment … Continue reading Bitter Modes
Bitter Bandwagon Ben
You might know that I live in Seattle. Now you might be thinking I'm gonna humblebrag about the fact that the Seattle Seahawks are in the Super Bowl for the second year in a row, and how I've been the biggest fan for life. And you'd be wrong. About five years ago, Seattle was … Continue reading Bitter Bandwagon Ben
Bitter Sell Out Giftures
It's Friday, which means we can start talking about what makes us bitter through little moving pictures. As you might now, the Super Bowl is coming up. I guess I could avoid this thing that is annoying me by just turning the station, but in the last week, I think I've only heard like zero … Continue reading Bitter Sell Out Giftures
Bittermunity
Wanna know why I'm your least favorite blogger? Because I'm around. ALLLL the time. I'm clogging up valuable space on the internet that you could be using for trees, or pictures of your kids, or YouTube. All day on YouTube and the video would move so much faster, if it wasn't for this guy that … Continue reading Bittermunity
Half-Hearted Friday Giftures
DO NOT READ THIS POST! It is terribly under enthusiastic and in honor of it being Friday and the first world tragedy that happened to me this week, I'm going to go ahead and put in a minimal effort today. For those of you who are regulars to BBB, you are used to this effort. … Continue reading Half-Hearted Friday Giftures
My Cybernetic Dream and My Bitter Heart Crushed
In the spirit of Mr. Martin Luther King's Day coming up, I had a dream. I've always wanted to be a cyborg. I want all my joints that have ever felt pain to be replaced by metal. I wanted metal arms, metal knees, metal back. Yesterday, as I was going through a real amount of pain in … Continue reading My Cybernetic Dream and My Bitter Heart Crushed
10 Bitter Me’s in Pop Culture
The Golden Globes happened two days ago and kicked off what Hollywood calls their "awards season", where they get together, dress up in their prom attire and congratulate themselves on doing such a great job in their school plays. They think that the whole world cares about their clothes and how well they acted in their … Continue reading 10 Bitter Me’s in Pop Culture
Help me Become Number 2
I've got great ambitions for bitterness. As an emotion, it has been underrated for quite some time. By quite some time, I mean forever. On the emotional rollercoaster, bitterness is waiting in a huge line to get on the coaster, while happiness, anger and jealousy are having fun taking the hairpin curves, loop de loops … Continue reading Help me Become Number 2
Frustration Friday Giftures
Nothing is more frustrating than expecting something good and getting something bad. Like when you expect to skip a rock, but not only does the rock not skip, but you throw it way short and it richochets off a bigger rock and it bounces back and hits you in the knee and causes you to go to surgery. Or when you expect … Continue reading Frustration Friday Giftures
Super BitterMan
The superhero genre is getting a little ridiculous. There are some legit superhero movie stars out there that I'm fine with getting big time movies. Guys like Superman, Batman, Iron Man, Wonder Woman, Wolverine, Spiderman and so forth. These days, if there is a legit cool or recognizable hero out there, they will get a movie made … Continue reading Super BitterMan
Bitteruptions
Today is the bitter equivalent of the best day of the year. It is the first Tuesday AFTER the holidays in which everyone (or at least everyone I know) took two or three weeks off of work and are now having to return to the realities of school, work and all kinds of bitter … Continue reading Bitteruptions
Looking in to the Bitter Future Giftures
BREAKING NEWS! This is your news anchor Captain Obvious! In what is unprecedented news, I've figured something out. We've done a calendar change and the year is now 2015. Do you know what that means? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? It means, Marty McFly and Doc Brown are going to be visiting Hill Valley … Continue reading Looking in to the Bitter Future Giftures
Ben's Bitter Blog 