BREAKING NEWS! This is your news anchor Captain Obvious! In what is unprecedented news, I've figured something out. We've done a calendar change and the year is now 2015. Do you know what that means? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? It means, Marty McFly and Doc Brown are going to be visiting Hill Valley … Continue reading Looking in to the Bitter Future Giftures
Fiction
Bitter Year End Wrap Up
If you don't know this by now, I'm gonna tell you something revolutionary about me. I don't blog like other people. I don't blog about recipes (well, I might do one if there is a recipe with something bitter in it and I learn how to cook someday), write about my family, blog about relationships, … Continue reading Bitter Year End Wrap Up
Bitter Comments and Commenter of the Year
Bitter comments are a necessary part of this blog because it is a way that I can get down on a more personal level with the people. This is a way I can tell a person one on one why they in particular should be bitter and how I can mentor them in more bitter … Continue reading Bitter Comments and Commenter of the Year
Twas the Night to Be Bitter
Just so you know, I didn't major in the poetry arts in college. Also, 'Twas the Night Before Christmas is very long and I am very impatient. And by the way, rappers don't always exactly rhyme all the time either and they get paid millions of dollars more than I do. So, with that in … Continue reading Twas the Night to Be Bitter
The White Elephant Bitter Blog Post
You know it's your favorite time of the year. Not the shopping, or the crowds or hullabalu. Not the television specials, or cheesy ads, or the egg nog. Not the parties, at least the party part. The party where you get to exchange White Elephant Gifts. The excuse you have to wrap up some garbage … Continue reading The White Elephant Bitter Blog Post
Bitter Friday Gifture Cleanse
Things have happened this week. Things that may never be unseen. Happy people talking about music, and presents and having fun with their families. It has been hard to look at, hard to see. Well, I can't take it anymore. I need to cleanse my mind of all this cheeriness. Well, it is Friday now and … Continue reading Bitter Friday Gifture Cleanse
Bittervational Speech – Everyone is Better Than You
It has been the purpose of this blog from the very beginning to help people overcome the heavy weight and burden of being happy all the time. If you don't believe me, go alllll the way back to my very first, terribly written post that introduced the world (by world, I mean my family) … Continue reading Bittervational Speech – Everyone is Better Than You
Not Wanted: Lost Puppy Blog
You didn't think this had anything to do with puppies did you? It was a ploy like a bad sports or newspaper headline to attract readership. But why would I ever want to attract you here? It just makes more work for me and work is the last thing I want to do on a Monday … Continue reading Not Wanted: Lost Puppy Blog
The Bitter Scents of the Season
It's finally December, which as you know, means that it is finally time for awesome characters to come out of the woodwork, like Scrooge and the Grinch stealing Christmas and all kinds of evil villains in movies, like Boss who makes you stay late on Christmas Eve and Boyfriend who is a little too into … Continue reading The Bitter Scents of the Season
Black Friday Giftures
It's Black Friday and nothing says Black Friday like greed. Black hearted rage, mixed with savings only 6 people will actually ever get, combined with angry, crazy people in a race for pole position for a chance at a ticket that may or may not get you into the room of a store … Continue reading Black Friday Giftures
Bitter Ben’s Book’s for Bitter Beginners
I work with a bunch of babies all day. Children. Whiny Brats. They cry all day, and need to be fed and given attention all the time. Any time they need something they ring and I'm supposed to answer. This makes me fully qualified to write bitter things about them. Along with being a bunch … Continue reading Bitter Ben’s Book’s for Bitter Beginners
Lost in Space…Universal Studios Space Edition
Some people think space is the final frontier, I say that is hooey. I've been there and there wasn't much to discover. There was some stars and some planets and some rocks and some moons and some suns and some weird looking people. Not so much weird green people with almond shaped eyes, but more … Continue reading Lost in Space…Universal Studios Space Edition
I literally can’t even…do Bitter Friday Giftures
Apparently there is a movement among the young people of the world, particularly the high school aged ones that are having a hard time comprehending how they can even... Not sure what they can't even...Is it that they have to walk uphill both ways to school? Or is that they have to get up at … Continue reading I literally can’t even…do Bitter Friday Giftures
All in one Bitterness Device
I've noticed lately that I'm not quite reaching all the people that I want to. I don't know if Bitterness is dying just as much as leaves on all the trees around here, but it seems like this time of year, should bring bitterness about, not cause it to go into hibernation. I looked … Continue reading All in one Bitterness Device
Surefire ways to get people to annoy you
I love advice. I can't wait to hear it, swish it around like a fine glass of water, let it sink deep down into my soul, allow it to be knocked around inside my head, then ignore it completely. So please give it to me. I want all the advices. Let me know all about … Continue reading Surefire ways to get people to annoy you
Lost in the Woods and other Bitter Posts: The Epcot Version
The forest is a place full of mystery, wonder and trees. Lots and lots of trees. Forests would be awesome if it wasn't for all the trees. If you haven't noticed, especially at this time of year, trees are kind of jerks. They litter constantly, they are always swaying and scratching and making spooky noises … Continue reading Lost in the Woods and other Bitter Posts: The Epcot Version
The Lost Bitter Posts Volume 2
Because I am a bitter man and a stubborn person, I would much more prefer to get lost on my way somewhere than to ever ask someone for instructions. I have wandered the streets of downtown Seattle aimlessly for hours, got lost in the mountains overnight and even got lost on my way from the … Continue reading The Lost Bitter Posts Volume 2
If I ruled the world…it would be a Bitter Place
I was reading the post of a fellow blogger, Alanna, a couple of weeks ago and she wrote a short post about what she would do if she ruled the world. Of course, I thought it was a great idea for a post so I am stealing it because I don't have any original thought. … Continue reading If I ruled the world…it would be a Bitter Place
Hey Bitter Journal
Hey Bitter Journal (I'm not going to call you a dear, journal) What's up bro? Doing good? No? Yeah me either. Life is pretty bitter these days. All kinds of things are making me bitter lately. As you should know my now, work sucks. You know what is irritating? Besides everything? They expect me to … Continue reading Hey Bitter Journal
Friday Slideday
I declare that it is officially Friday Slideday. That means you are officially invited to slide down a notch whatever it is that you were doing today. So, if you were at a slight 30% capacity on doing work this morning, slide that down a very comfortable and barely functioning 10%. If you … Continue reading Friday Slideday
Ben's Bitter Blog 