Can’t do attitude Friday Giftures

The thing I love best about living in America is the amount of freedom we are given. Dreams are so abundant here that they grow on tall, leaf covered lamp posts.  If there is a light on your street, there is a dream to be achieved.  If you want to a successful salesman, all you … Continue reading Can’t do attitude Friday Giftures

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Nap and Food Bitter Friday Giftures

I believe that some people are taking this long Labor Day weekend off a little early by taking Friday off (jerks) and of course, that makes me bitter. There are a lot of reasons why you should not take off early, but I can't think of any.  This means I will be stewing in my … Continue reading Nap and Food Bitter Friday Giftures

Raining on your Parade Gifs

It's another Friday and I'm sure you all have some great expectations about what you are going to do this weekend.  Maybe you will go to the beach, see a new movie, or go camping.  Before you go and get all excited about your weekend and all your high expectations for it, let me go ahead … Continue reading Raining on your Parade Gifs

2 Years, and 300 posts of Bitterness

Back on March 8, 2012, I was pretty bitter.  Just like every other day, but this day, I had enough of anonymously being bitter.  I had complained one too many times about how hardcore my job sucked to my co-workers and so they called started calling me Bitter Ben.  So on that day, I found … Continue reading 2 Years, and 300 posts of Bitterness

Xbox bitterness (aka Xbitterness)

People like shiny things.  Many of you, not me, are fooled by stuff that looks new and has be purchased because it will make you look like a vampire from Twilight.  Instead I prefer to wait to get the next big thing until it is year's old.  (See: my phone, my clothes, my house, car, … Continue reading Xbox bitterness (aka Xbitterness)

Friday Pictures – The Clever Edition

There is a long standing tradition between me and my family, acquaintances and co-workers, that I crack really lame jokes, puns, and mixed metaphors and they groan, snort or completely ignore me.  Since my plan is to live my life in complete and utter isolation, the plan is going much better than I had hoped.  Even bitter, there are … Continue reading Friday Pictures – The Clever Edition

Friday Bitter Pictures – Naughty List Edition

He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows when you've good or bad, so be good for goodness sake.  Stalker!  So you watch me sleep?  Did the NSA put you up to this? Sounds like you should be on the naughty list!  It's that day of the week where we get … Continue reading Friday Bitter Pictures – Naughty List Edition

Bitter Reasons to be tall

I guess today is a holiday, though how would I know it?  I'm at work, doing work (well, not right now) and I see no evidence of it being a holiday at all other than there are some oversized spiders hanging from the ceiling and spider webs everywhere. There is also some weirdo that doesn't have … Continue reading Bitter Reasons to be tall

Friday Fall Pictures

  I blogged yesterday about Autumn, or fall and how bitter it makes me.  Today, since it is Friday and I like to be lazy and just post Bitter Pictures of Failures of other people, I decided to go with a Fall theme.  And by Fall, I really mean fall, as in fall on your … Continue reading Friday Fall Pictures

Bitter Photobombing, Learning and Tables

Doesn't it make you bitter when you are trying to take a picture of something and someone photobombs your perfectly terrible and blurry picture?  I was trying to take a picture of my toe and this T-shirt totally photobombed my picture.  It came out of nowhere, jumped in my photo, acted like a jerk, then left, … Continue reading Bitter Photobombing, Learning and Tables

Bitter GIF/Pictures of the week (AKA The Lazy Post of The Week)

Why is it that when there is a fly in the house, I have to chase it like a crazed lunatic with a fly swatter, almost shatter windows, almost break every bone in my body avoiding obstacles, and scaring the children just so I can kill it and this Venus Flytrap lazily throws up a tenticle and gets to treat the fly like me on a Tuesday?  … Continue reading Bitter GIF/Pictures of the week (AKA The Lazy Post of The Week)

Outdoor Bitterness

When I was growing up, one of my first memories was when I was 6 years old.  My brother and I got home from an excersion of some sort(might have been a vacation trip or a trip to the grocery store.  You expect me to remember?  I was 6.)  I was dressed in my Superman pajamas and my brother was in his Batman pj's … Continue reading Outdoor Bitterness

Bitter Bucket List

Yesterday when I was giving our ditch a haircut and experiencing this weird sensation called pain(I'm never going to do this work thing again), I realized I was going to eventually kick the bucket(the stupid bucket keeps appearing in our yard somehow and I'm pretty clumsy). I've heard of a thing called a Bucket List … Continue reading Bitter Bucket List

Bitter Car Pictures of the Week

Doesn't it make you bitter when you just want someone else to do your work for you, because you are lazy? Well, not only am I lazy, but I am incompetent.  I don't know anything about cars, except how to operate the windshield wipers.  And even those I get confused with.  Which button makes them go slow … Continue reading Bitter Car Pictures of the Week

Summer Bitterness

My childhood played a bitterly cruel trick on me. Why? Because according to 1-13 year old Bitter Ben, I was supposed to get a mandatory 3 month summer vacation and I was forced to have fun.  Summers were a bitter time where I was supposed to do run around without purpose, play bitterly cruel pranks on … Continue reading Summer Bitterness

Random Acts of Bitterness

Most people I know want to make a difference in their lives.  I do too, but between my  B.I.T.T.E.R. School of Bitterness, my amusement park,Bitterland, this blog, which has the potential to be read by 10's of people, and my Bittertising Agency I have multiple avenues to affect the people of this world.  Most people don't have these vast … Continue reading Random Acts of Bitterness

School carnival bitterness

As you have may have read in the past, I am a Demusement park owner.  Disneyland was a place modeled after my park Bitterland.  The difference is that at Bitterland, I deliberately have disdain for my customers and I am honest about it, while Disney tries to hide the fact that it only loves your … Continue reading School carnival bitterness

Tent Bitterness

Welcome to Shelter 102 in The B.I.T.T.E.R. school of Bitterness, Bitterian students!  If you are here, you should have taken the pre-requisite, Shelter 101, Idiots that don't know anything about Shelter. I hope you all had a dreadfully bitter weekend .  Address any complaints to way overwhelmed TA.  If you did happen to have a good weekend, don't … Continue reading Tent Bitterness

Bitterland

According to the calendar, it should be springtime.  After spring, usually there is this season called Summer.  Summer is famous for many things, like scathingly hot weather(except in Seattle), drought, kids not being in school (causing apathy and laziness), forest fires, bugs, sunburns, overpriced and terrible summer movies, and overpriced and terrible amusement parks(in other … Continue reading Bitterland