I'm going to let you all in on a little secret. This one will probably take you a little time to process, but here goes. I'm Batman. Go ahead, gasp at your desk, or your phone or your Ipad. Okay, have you had a chance to breathe? Yes, I know it's a little risky … Continue reading My Bitter Secret Identity
Laziness
The Bitter Realm Part 2
So, I did a post last week about leaving this realm and going to another because doing stuff in this realm is hard and I'm laaazy. This is the continuation of that post, which bored and astounded no one. If you want something to put you to sleep, read the first part right here. If … Continue reading The Bitter Realm Part 2
Bitter Advice Column
Hello bitter people who occasionally read my blog. I have a question for you. Yeah you. You know. The one that reads this because you are bored at work and you have no access to anything on the internet but WordPress.... Yeah you. One commenter of my blog suggested that I am really good at giving … Continue reading Bitter Advice Column
In case you missed it…because you were trying to sell you garage
It's that time of year when you allow those annoying people that you can't stand(other people) to invade your yard and pay to take the crap that you are trying to get rid of. While you do get a little bit of money (let me stress a little), the trade off is that you have … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you were trying to sell you garage
Hitting a Wall Friday Giftures
You know how when you get to Friday and you've just given everything you can and you just can't give anymore? Well, I usually feel like that by Monday, so you can imagine how little I care by today. Sometimes you've just got to suck it up and be bitterly done on Friday and slump … Continue reading Hitting a Wall Friday Giftures
The Bitter Realm Part 1
After much contemplation (day dreaming at work) and coming to realization that I can't stand anyone anymore, I have decided that I have had enough of this realm. This earth has too much gravity (it's always holding me down) and the trees (with their fancy leaves and their condescending looks from above)have ruled here too long. I'm … Continue reading The Bitter Realm Part 1
In case you missed it…because you were busy celebrating Independence Day by being with you Framily
Most of you, myself included, probably wanted to spend your whole weekend alone, playing video games, watching Netflix and trolling people on the internet worldwide. My guess is that you, just like me, had to spend time with either your family or your friends because "it's the holiday weekend" and "holidays are for getting together … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you were busy celebrating Independence Day by being with you Framily
Explosively Bitter Giftures
Some people think the Fourth of July (or Independence Day as some people call it) is all about independence or picnic baskets with egg salad and red, white and blue Cheetos, but they are wrong because that is an opinion and only my opinion is right. So I know you are on pins and needles, … Continue reading Explosively Bitter Giftures
In case you missed it…because you were busy getting lost in the forest
On the weekends, I rarely venture off the land mass known as leather couch island, but for some reason some miniature life form kept brow beating me to leave the island as as he does from time to time. Instead of continuing to allow my unshaven brows to receive a Mike Tyson like beating, I … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you were busy getting lost in the forest
Bitter Friday Jerktures
Hey Bitter human people (and the rest of you..). It freaking Friday and it is time to start acting like a freaking jerk. (So like I act every day. I have a few suggestions in case you need some.) Be mean to your neighbors, slow down significantly in in fast lane on the freeway, buy … Continue reading Bitter Friday Jerktures
Bitterizing Upbeat Music
Music has been on my brain a lot lately, especially this last weekend. I had the displeasure of seeing the Lego Movie because my kids "claimed" it was good and "claimed" it had a twist ending, but you should know by know how I feel about that. If you don't, you can go back to the days gone by and read … Continue reading Bitterizing Upbeat Music
In case missed it…because you were busy ruining your knees at your Father Daughter Dance
They are only knees right? It's not like I kneed them for laying down on the couch, or sitting at work or anything. Might as well dance like an idiot in front of my daughter, her friends, and their dads right? And who doesn't want to listen to music you haven't hear since you were … Continue reading In case missed it…because you were busy ruining your knees at your Father Daughter Dance
Ride or Die Friday Giftures
While I was on vacation a few weeks ago, I just happened to be flipping the stations and came upon the movie Fast and Furious 6. I hadn't seen one of those movies since the 3rd or 4th iteration and was totally curious to find out if Vin Diesel had grown as an actor. Of … Continue reading Ride or Die Friday Giftures
My Bitter Stunt Double
I've been waiting to say something mean to my co-workers all day. I know it is only 6:05 am and none of them are here yet, and they haven't said their morning stupid thing yet, or had a chance to avoid doing my work for me yet, but I am primed and pumped to ruin … Continue reading My Bitter Stunt Double
Spurs NBA Champ Bitterness
Since 1990, when I was in high school in South Dakota, I've been a fan of the San Antonio Spurs. People thought it a little strange that someone from South Dakota would be a fan of a team that was not only really far away, but a team that wasn't even regionally relevant. But I … Continue reading Spurs NBA Champ Bitterness
Bitter Worlds Colliding Gifs
It's Friday the 13th today and you know what that means. Yep. Time for some Friday Giftures. There have been a lot of collisions this week. The NBA Finals have been a collision of a team that largely depends on one person and a team that likes to share. The World Cup is starting which … Continue reading Bitter Worlds Colliding Gifs
Why do I watch Bitter TV?
Some people might know me as a person that works and does things and when I get the time, I watch television. The fact of the matter is that I'm not so much a really lazy person, but more of a semi-ambitious couch. I do get up on occasion to feed myself and check … Continue reading Why do I watch Bitter TV?
Living Down to Bitter Expectation Giftures
There has been a lot of talk in the NBA lately about legacy. Will Lebron and the Heat be able to win three Championships in a row and solidify his "legacy" as one of the greatest ever? Will Tim Duncan and the Spurs win one last one and retire as one of the best ever … Continue reading Living Down to Bitter Expectation Giftures
Bitter Conflict
One of my favorite things to do while on vacation is to go to movies with my son. Because no one appreciates the low cost of going to a movie more than a son that thinks we can just buy a new TV if he accidentally chucks a video game controller right through the … Continue reading Bitter Conflict
In case you missed it…because the media was chasing you
You just typed the blog of your life and that one person that wrote a book, accidentally followed you. All of a sudden, your blog is blowing up, and you are adding like 5 followers a month. All of a sudden, rumors are flying around about the bacon vegan meal you had, the scandalous … Continue reading In case you missed it…because the media was chasing you
Ben's Bitter Blog 