They are only knees right? It’s not like I kneed them for laying down on the couch, or sitting at work or anything. Might as well dance like an idiot in front of my daughter, her friends, and their dads right? And who doesn’t want to listen to music you haven’t hear since you were in diapers (or before for most of you). There was Crystal Light and cookies that formed the most perfectly hideous taste together, and glowsticks as the worst sort of light ever. There was the photos of an old sweaty guy embarassing his daughter, soon to be put on Facebook for none of the world to see. Yep, totally not worth it.
So while you were out ruining your knees, or other non important things like you backs or brains, I put out a few non important posts. Such as the genius post like Spurs NBA Champ Bitterness. Sure they won the championship, but they lost a bunch of games too. If I would have lost that many, I would have been kicked out of school. At least they get punished by making millions of dollars and getting a 3 month summer vacation.
I say a lot of stupid and bitter things and a lot of people want to hurt me. Luckily I have a Stunt Double. Unluckily, my stunt double makes me do his stunts. Like for instance, ruining my knees at a dance. Find out what else my stunt double made me do in Stunt Double Bitterness.
In a movie that needed more stunts than a Hollywood Action Movie, uh Fast and Furious 6 (which is a Hollywood Action Movie) used the motto Ride or Die. I don’t think of those as mutually exclusive, but in their small world, I guess it is the only choice. Let’s just hope my next commute doesn’t produce that choice between riding and dying. Find out more on Ride or Die Friday Giftures.
Tweets came faster than a Hollywood Blockbuster, uh, I mean a car in a race in a Hollywood Blockbuster (don’t be jealous of my fancy metaphors or similies or whatever those things are).
It would be nice if your boss would give you a courtesy call before stopping by your cubicle and so rudely interrupting your web browsing.