While I was on vacation a few weeks ago, I just happened to be flipping the stations and came upon the movie Fast and Furious 6. I hadn’t seen one of those movies since the 3rd or 4th iteration and was totally curious to find out if Vin Diesel had grown as an actor. Of course he had (through steriods) grown and it was good to see that the stunts were still really realistic and I totally bought in. It was completely realistic that Vinny stood on a hood of car going 100 mph’s and leaped across a median on a bridge to catch his girlfriend and land on a car, only to just kind of shatter the windshield on the car he landed on. And his driving a car completely through a plane? Child play. Don’t we all do that on a weekly basis? The thing that I learned from this is their motto: Ride or die. Those are the only choices. Since I’m not into dying this weekend, how bout we ride?
Let’s Ride…
..the catnip high bars.
Let’s Ride…
…the dodgeball freeway.
Let’s Ride…
…the index finger Merry Go Round.
Let’s Ride..
..the downhill roof slopes.
Let’s ride…
…the running of the humans.
Let’s ride…
…the grocery cart Olympics.
Let’s ride…
…the Wheelbarrow 500.
Let’s ride…
…the Battle of Valley Pillow Case.
Let’s ride…
…the Juggling of Really Tiny Boxes Contest.
Let’s ride…
…the My Spice all of a Sudden Turned into a Bee then Make a Crazy Face Competition.
Let’s ride….
… in the Most Embarrasing Insurance Claims World Cup.
And last of all, Let’s Ride…
…for the You’ve Got One More Lap to go Idiot Bowl.
Have a bitter weekend and make sure you drive incarefully out there!
ARRRRGGGHHHH
Bitter Ride or Die Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
Pingback: The .Gif Friday Post No. 718 – The Most Annoying Girl on Giphy, Dismissive Owl, Twirly Girly & Shots at the Dog Bar – Tacky Raccoons
Downhill roof slopes looks like fun! Let’s ride!
LikeLike
Sled, snowboard, or skis? Either one could be a die.
LikeLike
How about good ol’ butt sliding?
LikeLike
Naah too old fashioned.
LikeLike
Pingback: In case missed it…because you were busy ruining your knees at your Father Daughter Dance | Ben's Bitter Blog
I’m still trying to figure out the pillowfight one…
LikeLike
I’d like to whack some people with that pillow. Who am I kidding? I’d whack most people with that thing.
LikeLike
Crazy-face,
you’ve got the goofiest little crazy-face …
I’m running out of things that rhyme with mace,
haste, and place … you sure have started somethin’ —
you keep my fingers pumpin’ …
LikeLike
Sounds like a bitter chart topping hit. I’ll take over for the the Bitter Kasey Casem and put that at number 2.
LikeLike
After seeing all that, I am riding.
LikeLike
It’s a good choice, because they alternative is dying.
LikeLike
I liked the wheelbarrow one. And the cat (though I’m more of a ‘dog person’).
As for the inspiration for this post, I haven’t watched any of those movies since Tokyo Drift. Was the sixth decent?
LikeLike
I’m more of a dog person too, though we don’t have any animals, except a hamster that never bothers me. I’m the one that put the hammer down on animals. I had a cat that I couldn’t stand growing up and she tormented us for 20 years. And as great as dogs can be, they still smell. My son comes home from his friends house and he always smells like a wet dog. And my daughter is terrified of dogs, especially little ones. I would only get a cat for temporary purposes and only to eat mice.
LikeLike
Wow, I can’t imagine not having animals (apart from a hamster).
Yes, cats can be pretty evil. (Poo is.)
Dogs only really stink when they’re not given baths. Yes, you have the stinky breeds (like beagles), but some are much worse than others. Pig gets baths pretty often and she rarely stinks because of that. (But yes, going out in the rain is pretty awful until her next bath.)
I’m not a fan of little dogs. Like . . . at all.
I don’t blame her for being terrified of the small ones. They’re more inclined to bite. The only dog I’ve EVER been bitten by was a Cocker Spaniel (which is a medium-small rather than small, but still counts as small to me because it sounds like a yip for a bark).
(I know quite a bit about dogs, and actually wanted to be a ‘dog behavioral expert’ for a while when I was younger. Just a little tidbit there.)
I LOVE dogs. (Apart from the little ones.)
And I dunno, but I just think it’s really good to have them. (Only if you want them, obviously.)
Yes, cats would be good for a mice infestation. haha
LikeLike
Do they sell that pillow case? I need one. Three, I mean.
LikeLike
It would be a best seller if they did. Also you would be seeing a lot of my co-workers “accidentally” disappearing.
LikeLike
Absolutely hilarious, Ben.
LikeLike
The gifs are awesome, I just put those suckers in a random order with some worse put together words.
LikeLike
Hahahaha! The grocery cart olympic guy is 100% just going to walk away. Smooth. So smooth.
LikeLike
He gonna be walking right back inside and buying new milk, because his wife will be pissed if he comes home with none.
LikeLike
I’m bitter that all my wheelbarrow race partners were not this good. I’m also bitter about the way that woman was cooking the salmon; she was totally ruining it even before she threw it out the window. Wasted food makes my bitterness bitter….
LikeLike
I know. Even worse than the ruined window, car, and pan was the poor salmon that was being destroyed in vain.
LikeLike
I know from bitter experience that some people just can’t be trusted with anything edible. Or glass. Or equipment of any type……
LikeLike
I would be one of those people. I can find a way to lose or break just about anything.
LikeLike
Awesome!
LikeLike
Well, you know, of course it wasn’t! We only have one chance, RIDE OR DIE! :0
LikeLike
I especially like the last one.
LikeLike
I like how she could have just put a little bit of Pam on it and prevented having to buy a new window, new car, new pan, but most of all a new fish.
LikeLike