I am off this week from work and school and I have no extravagant plans. I'm not going to Bitterland, I don't have any B.I.T.T.E.R. School of Bitterness classes or even a trip to Hawaii. I'm not even on what the idiots call the Staycation, where you wander around your own town in search of … Continue reading Post Office Bitterness
Humor
School carnival bitterness
As you have may have read in the past, I am a Demusement park owner. Disneyland was a place modeled after my park Bitterland. The difference is that at Bitterland, I deliberately have disdain for my customers and I am honest about it, while Disney tries to hide the fact that it only loves your … Continue reading School carnival bitterness
Bitter Picture Bonanza of the week
I used to think that turtles didn't have much use because they were slow. It wasn't until I got older that I realized that I wanted to be just like them. They said we couldn't learn anything from turtles, and by "they" I mean "them". You know, the guys that say things and girls that say stuff. Turtles never … Continue reading Bitter Picture Bonanza of the week
Bicycle Bitterness
Remember the feeling you had the first time you learned how to do something? The first time you learned to fail at math and got an "F" on your report card? Or almost drowned learning how to swim? Or got your first cavity, by brushing your teeth improperly or even got bitter for the first … Continue reading Bicycle Bitterness
Kickstarter Bitterness
A couple of weeks ago, I wrote a post, hoping to find a bitter rival out there on the Internet. I got a lot of response from eager goody two shoes wishing to make this a nicer place to live. Bunch of weirdos. I fought and defeated many nice rivals. Then, all of a sudden … Continue reading Kickstarter Bitterness
Movie Trailer Bitterness
It is that time of year. You know what I'm talking about. Summer. Okay, not calendarly for another 3 weeks. And not weather wise because it is still gray and cloudy. Not in school terms either, because our kids aren't out yet. And not summer barbeque wise yet, because we haven't had any summer bar-b-que's at work … Continue reading Movie Trailer Bitterness
Computer Bitterness
There was a time in my life when I was fast. In seventh grade, I remember running a mile in under six minutes. In basketball, my sophomore year, I was the fastest guy on the team. I ran track and mowed the lawn. It was because I naturally gifted and incredibly in shape. I was really … Continue reading Computer Bitterness
Day after Bitterness
I am a bitter forward thinker. A bitter visionary. While others are thinking about things that make them bitter in the present, I am looking forward to things that will make me bitter in the future. I don't look at the past and stew over past bitterness or live in the moments bitterness like most … Continue reading Day after Bitterness
Lazy Saturday Bitterness
I am an ambitious person when it comes to not doing things and being lazy. While I don't have time during the week (Monday-Friday) to do laziness, I do my best to plan for it during work hours. Obviously, I try to keep work to a minimum at my job. No need to get too … Continue reading Lazy Saturday Bitterness
Time zone bitterness
As an esteemed (that is another word for bitter right?) member of this society of Americans, by way of being born, I have the right of free speech. The Bills of the Right Constitutions tells me so. You bitter believe that I am going to full advantage of this and abuse it to the best of my blogabilities. There are other … Continue reading Time zone bitterness
Bitter Awareness Week
This morning I woke with a start from my normal nightmaring, because I felt like something was wrong. I looked at my alarm clock and it said 4:42 am. I missed my alarm. That is why things felt so wrong. Adreneline kicked in and I rushed to take a quick shower and then promptly went back … Continue reading Bitter Awareness Week
My bitter career
After a full week of working my arms by typing things on my computer, stretching on my couch and pushing the button on my remote control and my video game controller, I decided to declare myself eligible for the world arm wrestling championships. Don't be jealous. Not everyone has what it takes, despite numerous movies … Continue reading My bitter career
Bitter News with Pictures
Sarcasm is my second language. The only reason it is second is because Bitterness is my native tongue. I hope to someday learn English fluently. When I get really ambitious I might learn Spanish bitterness, then possibly Spanish sarcasm. Don't ever expect me to learn Spanish though. There is finally a way to express my heartfelt … Continue reading Bitter News with Pictures
Wanted: Bitter Rival to Share Bitter Feud with
Hi, Bitter People and others. There is something that I want to get off my chest. I have to admit that lately I've been feeling empty. Don't get me wrong. Being bitter is great and all. But I have been missing something my whole life and this morning I finally figured what it was. I … Continue reading Wanted: Bitter Rival to Share Bitter Feud with
Tent Bitterness
Welcome to Shelter 102 in The B.I.T.T.E.R. school of Bitterness, Bitterian students! If you are here, you should have taken the pre-requisite, Shelter 101, Idiots that don't know anything about Shelter. I hope you all had a dreadfully bitter weekend . Address any complaints to way overwhelmed TA. If you did happen to have a good weekend, don't … Continue reading Tent Bitterness
Mother’s Day Bitterness
I've noticed around the Blogimunity, facebook (facebook doesn't get a capital letter), and Twitter that many people have been saying really nice things about their moms. It seems like that there has been a simultaneous, worldwide niceness towards moms. I guess everyone has just been really sentimental towards their moms and for that I … Continue reading Mother’s Day Bitterness
Meeting Bitterness
Okay everyone, meeting in the conference room, 5 minutes. Alright is everyone here? Fantastic. Today's meeting is to discuss further the meaning of a meeting. You know that expression "Unnecessary is the mother of all meetings?" No? Well, it's new. I just made it up. It's also true and it is the bitter topic of the … Continue reading Meeting Bitterness
Bitter Contest Loser
Remember when I decided to do a Bitter contest where you could win something? Last week or the week before or something? Well I rang up the results of those who actually entered and I did some math and found through my amazing..ly horrible math skills that we are all losers of the contest. Mostly … Continue reading Bitter Contest Loser
Mailman Bitterness
I appreciate my mailman's efficiency. If I wouldn't have locked the door, he wouldn't have had to pummel the glass to get in to give me my junk mail, worthless magazine, and monthly eviction notice. I keep getting these crazy telephone calls at 2 in the morning from a guy name Biff that says something … Continue reading Mailman Bitterness
Bitter Yardwork
The weekend. A time where you stop working and relax and spend time with your family. Go to a movie or relax on a hammock, sit around and watch TV and lay on the couch. That kind of thing. Whatever I do, I make sure not to exert any effort. Cause you know effort means … Continue reading Bitter Yardwork
Ben's Bitter Blog 