3 PM Afternoon Crash Bitter Friday Giftures

  Based on recent trends, or maybe just what I've noticed,  I think the human body seems to naturally shut down around 3 pm. I assume most people, like me have finished their really important work by 10 am, had lunch by 12 or 1 pm and are just biding their time until 5 pm. … Continue reading 3 PM Afternoon Crash Bitter Friday Giftures

Football Season Bitter Friday Giftures

  Last night, I was sitting on the couch, relaxing from the bitter day of work I almost always have, and my son comes tromping in from football practice. As always, he left a trail of things leading up to himself, so even an incompetent detective like Inspector Clouseau could find him. He drops his … Continue reading Football Season Bitter Friday Giftures

Cancellation Bitter Friday Giftures

  Baseball is kind of a weird sport. The majors actually start in late March, which is technically spring, in some places, but in places like Chicago, and Minnesota and Milwaukee (which all have major league teams) not so much every year. Baseball depends on not having weather issues. Well, in the little leagues, where … Continue reading Cancellation Bitter Friday Giftures

I’m ready to sell out

I've never been to a concert in my life. I don't know if it is because I like money, because I want to my ears to work, because no one has ever invited me to one, or be...oh yeah, it's because I hate crowds. We've already talked about my claustraphobia this week. That is one … Continue reading I’m ready to sell out

Pick Up Lines Ben

You all thought I was lazy. And you are absolutely right. If it was possible for someone invent something that would allow me to slide off the couch, roll me to the kitchen where a sandwich would be made for me, I would probably never leave the couch. Then the other day, I watched something … Continue reading Pick Up Lines Ben

The Bitter Transforming Pizza

There is something I have never understood about Halloween. It is one the biggest in this country, where I've heard the most money is spent, and somehow it isn't really a holiday? At least from what I have heard, a holiday consists of me getting the day off. And as long as I can remember, … Continue reading The Bitter Transforming Pizza

Rolling the Dice Friday Giftures

  I feel like I failed you this week. Not only have I done almost no posting, but I also did a super serious one that hardly contained any bitterness other than to be bitter about younger people than me, trying to teach me something. I don't know if it was opposite day, or I … Continue reading Rolling the Dice Friday Giftures

Bitter Rivalry of the Week: The Red Pill vs. The Blue Pill

The Matrix is my all time favorite surprise movies. After I graduated college, I continued to be just as much of a dork as I was in college and that meant I went to see a lot of movies alone. I was okay with that because it was really hard to find people as bitter … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week: The Red Pill vs. The Blue Pill

How to Solve Your Bitter Energy Crisis

This last Saturday, I was convinced that I was the only person in the tri-state area(Washington, Canada, and Portland) that thought that I would be able to walk in at 9:00 am(or a little after) for the 9 am doorbuster to a get the new Call of Duty game I only kinda wanted for $19.99 at … Continue reading How to Solve Your Bitter Energy Crisis

In case you missed it…because you didn’t really miss much

If you a regular reader of this crap, uh I mean this blog, then you certainly didn't miss much by skipping out this week.  In fact, I didn't really miss much either, deciding that watching paint dry and grass grow much more interesting that deciding to do a blog for the amusement of no one.  … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you didn’t really miss much

Real Moving Friday Giftures

  It's been an exhausting week.  I've learned things, like maybe I want to live on Neptune, not only because it rains diamonds there, but also there are so few people there.  Maybe even none. And if that is even a remote possibility, then...Probably not though.  There is a whole Neptunerds that just want to talk … Continue reading Real Moving Friday Giftures

Lazy Friday Giftures

I just don't feel like doing anything today.  Do you blame me? I've been expending a lot of energy putting my bitterness on display, and today feels like one of those Fridays where I take a head vacation, where it looks like I am concentrating really hard on something on my computer screen, but really … Continue reading Lazy Friday Giftures

In case you missed it…because you were busy working hard on your laziness

People get busy on the weekend.  I get it, there's a lot of fun and laziness to pack into 2 days.  Until the weekend gets longer and the work week gets shorter, (I'm working with Obama on that) there is always going to be a lot of pressure to get in all the laziness and … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you were busy working hard on your laziness