I've always fancied myself to be a bit of a rebel. Not an outward rebel that fights against society or wears hipster clothes, but a subtle shake of the fist in the air when other people aren't looking. Like when someone tells me I shouldn't eat pizza every Friday, or that we should love … Continue reading Fight the Power Friday Giftures
Fiction
Bitter Office Scavenger Hunt
You know how when you are at the office and you are playing work Dodgeball by trying to avoid co-workers at all costs? But the moment you need them they are not around? Probably because you avoid them at all costs and they don't want to be around you, but that's besides the point? Well, … Continue reading Bitter Office Scavenger Hunt
Mister Matched Presents the Troglodyte’s Victor Secret’s Bitter Carpet Show
They say that clothes make the man. Yeah, they make the man bitter. I guess I understand the need to wear them, but why does it have to be so complicated? Why did someone way back in the day make it necessary to have rules of fashion? Like things are supposed to match. Certain colors … Continue reading Mister Matched Presents the Troglodyte’s Victor Secret’s Bitter Carpet Show
An ode to my Mother
You know how today is Mother's Day? And you know how you are supposed to shower not only so you don't smell and she doesn't faint from your odor, but also shower her with gifts and compliments and praise today and then take her for granted the rest of the year? Well, I'm not gonna … Continue reading An ode to my Mother
Sitting Down on the Friday Giftures
Not all the time, but sometimes when I'm coming up with ideas for the subject of my Friday Giftures, I ask my son to give me a word, any word. He will throw out some obvious ones, like bitter or whatever book he is reading at the time, and I deny him several times until … Continue reading Sitting Down on the Friday Giftures
Wake up WordPressians!
I hate to say it, but I actually don't really. I think I need to get some of those resuscitation paddles and yell, "Clear"! I don't know if I need to pump you full of some adrenaline, or lace your caffeine with more caffeine, or shine a bright light in your face, or get a … Continue reading Wake up WordPressians!
Bitter Running Commentary
If you're an introvert like me, you probably have a dialogue going on in your head a vast majority of the time. The information highway in your brain has flying cars and runaway trains going 350 mph, above the speed limit. Every once in a while, your brain officer pulls over one of these thoughts … Continue reading Bitter Running Commentary
Walking the Bitter Plank
I get most of my information about the world either from the Today show(but only at 8 am - 8:20 am during my morning break), Twitter, my wife's Facebook, (I don't get much from mine, because lack of Facebook friends, or ones that spread gossip like butter on bitter.) or sports talk radio. If … Continue reading Walking the Bitter Plank
2 Legit 2 Legit 2 Legit to Gif…tures, Friday Bitter Giftures
MC Hammer rose to fame 26 years ago with his album "Please Hammer Don't Hurt Em". Of course, he eventually did hurt us all when we found out that he bought a $30 million dollar home, paid some 40 employees way too much money for, and went bankrupt. But did MC Hammer, who had … Continue reading 2 Legit 2 Legit 2 Legit to Gif…tures, Friday Bitter Giftures
Dodgeball: A Bitter Underdog Story
"If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball." - Patches O' Houlihan "Allow me the pleasure of introducing you to Blade, Laser...Blazer." - White Goodman "Nobody makes me bleed my own blood." - White Goodman If you don't know these names or quotes, you are missing out on one of the … Continue reading Dodgeball: A Bitter Underdog Story
What I did on my Summer Vacation (or Spring. Whatever)
Remember those days when you were a tiny little thing that took naps in Kindergarten instead of prepping for the SAT's? When life was simple and instead of writing an essay about Lincoln's presidency your teacher asked you to write what you did for you summer vacation? Well, I had a week off last week … Continue reading What I did on my Summer Vacation (or Spring. Whatever)
Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Rest vs. Rust
If you are familiar with the NBA Playoffs or sports in general, you probably hear this argument tossed around about whether a team gets too much rest or not when they have a long layoff. For instance, if a really good team clinches their playoff series against a team pretty quickly, and the other … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Rest vs. Rust
Turbo Charged Friday Giftures
Wreck-It Ralph is one of my favorite movies not only because it's about video games, but because it's all about villains. The weird thing is that Ralph lives out in a brickyard all alone and for some reason wants to hang out with other people. Not sure why he would want to be around … Continue reading Turbo Charged Friday Giftures
Work-Life Imbalance
If you've noticed the lack of enthusiasm coming from this side of the bitterblogosphere, it's because I've been on vacation this week. Going to exotic locations like the grocery store, the movie theatre and the backyard to avoid getting a lawsuits because of our stupid trampoline. I don't generally go to exotic locales because you … Continue reading Work-Life Imbalance
The Bitter Ecosystem
As spring heats up, many people turn their attention to being at work all day, while some "other lucky people" that aren't them are going on glamorous vacations to tropical paradises around the world. Some people are jealous of the sandy beaches that others get to soak up the rays in. Others are jealous of … Continue reading The Bitter Ecosystem
Pizzalympics
I'm only good at a few things. I excel at laying on the couch. I can make macaroni and cheese. I'm pretty good at almost finishing things in video games. I'm pretty great at zoning out at a moment's notice. On Friday, when I was getting my pizza, then driving to the library, I realized … Continue reading Pizzalympics
Action Movie Friday Giftures
Growing up in the 80's, action movies were the best. There was Schwarzenegger in his iconic role in Kindergarten Cop, Stallone in the amazing Stop! or My Mom Will Shoot or Bruce Willis in the captivating Hudson Hawk. Those movies were straight up straight to video classics that every fan should watch so they revel … Continue reading Action Movie Friday Giftures
The Bitter Side of the Force
A lot of impressive things happened last night. The Golden State Warriors broke the win record with 73 games, Kobe Bryant scored 60 in his final game, I got three Kabooms in one match in Gears of War 3, and even managed to get to bed before 11:30 pm. Truly impressive physical feats last night. … Continue reading The Bitter Side of the Force
The Bitterfly Effect
If you've been paying attention (and why would you pay him? did he babysit for you? Do your taxes?) to my blog at all in the last several days, you know it was my birthday on Saturday. So at work, along with another work citizen, we celebrated our birthdays. It was festive day where I … Continue reading The Bitterfly Effect
43 Reasons to be bitter
For those of you who haven't been around this blog since my last birthday, it is my annual tradition to list one bitter item for every year I've been on this bitter earth. So join the bitter party and find your favorite reason to be bitter. 1. Butterflies - Their random flickering is freaking creepy. … Continue reading 43 Reasons to be bitter
Ben's Bitter Blog 