I haven't progressed much since my teen years. Just like I did in my teens, I still play video games, I still wear jeans and shorts (and jean shorts(jorts)), and still also have a driver's license just like I did as a teen. As the old expression goes, "The more things change, the more things … Continue reading Nobody is looking at you BFG’s
Bitter Friday Giftures
I will soon own Scotland…and then the World
Taking over the world is hard work. Terrorists are constantly trying to do it in movies, governments are always trying to topple other governments and countries one at a time, and Pinky and the Brain have been trying to do it since 1995. Sorry lab rat, beat you to it. Unfortunately for Pinky and the … Continue reading I will soon own Scotland…and then the World
Misery loves Privacy BFG’s
Last week, I said I was taking care of important business, so I just had to give my blog the average amount of attention. That was because I was dropping my daughter off to college. It was important for me to do so, because she is now attending my alma mater. Which according to Wikipedia … Continue reading Misery loves Privacy BFG’s
Generic Bitter Friday Giftures
Since I'm going to be taking care of very important business this Friday, I'm not going to be available to you for your weekly dose of bitterness. I know you expect high-quality content every single Friday without exception, because you're greedy and needy. I know you all think I'm a creative genius, and you're right, … Continue reading Generic Bitter Friday Giftures
Emotional Support Video Game
I don't know about you, but I'm fascinated by the story of Steve Jobs. Why? Because he more at things than I have ever even attempted. Failure is the bedrock of bitterness. And if you think I'm bitter, you should see how bitter Steve Jobs was. Not as bitter, but he was one of the … Continue reading Emotional Support Video Game
Dueling Identities Bitter Friday Giftures
Did you know that there are literally millions of podcasts on the internet right now? I didn't know that either, because I'm just guessing. What do you think, I talk about facts on here? Almost everything I write is either made up or mostly made up. But one thing I do know is that there … Continue reading Dueling Identities Bitter Friday Giftures
Kid Icarus Complex Bitter Friday Giftures
I never paid attention much in school when it came to Greek Gods and myths and legends. Turns out I probably should have paid less attention to math and science and more attention the Legends. Because the kind of math that I use nowadays can either be solved by calculators, Excel or YouTube. But the … Continue reading Kid Icarus Complex Bitter Friday Giftures
The Official Water Supplier of Football Player BFG’s
Sports and marketing go together like Bitter and Ben. No movie better encapsulates sports marketing than Jerry Maguire. He taught us really important lessons like, "SHOW ME THE MONEY!" and other things, like repeating phrases over and over to emphasize fairly unimportant things like love. Pam Beasley from the Office was even inspired to abandon … Continue reading The Official Water Supplier of Football Player BFG’s
Water We Doing Bitter Friday Giftures
My favorite thing to do at work is chatting and chilling with my co-workers. Who needs headphones or distracting work when you can absentmindedly trade small talk with your co-workers. The day wouldn't feel complete without having to get off your headphones so you can answer such questions as, "Good morning". I feel like I'm … Continue reading Water We Doing Bitter Friday Giftures
Bitter BrainStorm Friday Giftures
I live in Utah, where it gets pretty hot during the summer (16 days this summer where we hit the triple digits) but it's dry heat, so we don't get near as hot as the humid area people. Luckily, I've figured out a really great way to beat the oppressive heat of the summer and … Continue reading Bitter BrainStorm Friday Giftures
Getting the Job I really Want Bitterness
When I first started my job at a radio company, they had a reader board above the conference room. One of ladies in my department had just celebrated her 15 years there. I had a few reactions to that. My first reaction was, "How could anyone have the endurance to last 15 years at a … Continue reading Getting the Job I really Want Bitterness
Uniting the Clans Bitterness
It's pretty funny to me that companies actually have different departments the each have their own bosses. For instance, the company that I work for has a graphic design department, and an accounting department, and a marketing department. Some people might mistake being in a department as a team of people that work together. What … Continue reading Uniting the Clans Bitterness
Hollywood Destruction Bitterness
As the creator of insanely awesome bitter content that YOU get the privilege of reading/experiencing/bitterly laughing your head off to twice weekly, I understand the value of creating. I take my humor and bitterness very seriously, because you deserve to have the most creative bitter blogging possible. Most people live their whole lives in peaceful … Continue reading Hollywood Destruction Bitterness
Helicopter Parent Bitter Friday Giftures
If there is one thing we can all agree on, it's that Die Hard is the greatest Christmas movie of all time. Thank goodness we can agree on that, because it was starting to look like we couldn't agree on anything. Some people thought it would be world peace or that shark bites are awesome, … Continue reading Helicopter Parent Bitter Friday Giftures
Separation of Person and Ality
I wouldn't say I'm not a fan of Stranger Things, I would just say that I haven't watched it yet. From what I've been told people love it because there is just a lack of great romantic comedies out there, so Stranger Things just fills that void. Normally I would say that Hallmark has the … Continue reading Separation of Person and Ality
They’re just not trying anymore…
In case you haven't been hanging on every one of my blog words (if you haven't, shame on you), I recently took a trip to Scotland. I've talked a lot about Scotland lately and you're going to hear about it whether you like it or not. Although today's post isn't even about Scotland. It's more … Continue reading They’re just not trying anymore…
Hidden Door Bitterness
I haven't asked for much in life except unlimited wealth, unlimited health and unambiguous adoration from everyone, without having to talk to any of them. And of course, an underground bunker to store all my wealth and to protect me from people. Oh, and a moat, because they would be fun to store sharks, alligators, … Continue reading Hidden Door Bitterness
Brokemon Bitterness
I remember very vividly when Pokemon Go came out. It was the summer of 2016 and I was quitting my job of 15 years, and we were packing all our stuff to move 800 miles away. It was a busy summer to say the least. Pokemon Go was this phenomenon where almost everyone in the … Continue reading Brokemon Bitterness
Bitter Balance BFG’s
At the end of Inception, Leo spins a metal top to see if he is floating on the piece of wood at the end of Titanic. It was just his way of figuring out if he was still in reality where a woman really would not share some of the plank with him or if … Continue reading Bitter Balance BFG’s
The World is Going to…
A long time ago, I decided to make a decision. Making decisions are really hard for me, so I had to hype myself up just to decide to make a decision. I finally decided to make one, but then I changed my mind. Then I changed back, because someday I knew that I would have … Continue reading The World is Going to…
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