I was reading the post of a fellow blogger, Alanna, a couple of weeks ago and she wrote a short post about what she would do if she ruled the world. Of course, I thought it was a great idea for a post so I am stealing it because I don't have any original thought. … Continue reading If I ruled the world…it would be a Bitter Place
Fiction
Hey Bitter Journal
Hey Bitter Journal (I'm not going to call you a dear, journal) What's up bro? Doing good? No? Yeah me either. Life is pretty bitter these days. All kinds of things are making me bitter lately. As you should know my now, work sucks. You know what is irritating? Besides everything? They expect me to … Continue reading Hey Bitter Journal
Friday Slideday
I declare that it is officially Friday Slideday. That means you are officially invited to slide down a notch whatever it is that you were doing today. So, if you were at a slight 30% capacity on doing work this morning, slide that down a very comfortable and barely functioning 10%. If you … Continue reading Friday Slideday
Some amount of reasons why swimming makes me bitter
I spent a lot of time this summer swimming in pools. We went from water parks with amusement park rides, to water parks with lazy rivers to a pool that just had a diving board. Several of those times we ended up getting wet. In fact, did you know that when you go swimming, … Continue reading Some amount of reasons why swimming makes me bitter
From the BitterBenzoac Era to the Bitter Twitter Era
Let me just say this so you can be bitter at me. The post you are going to read below (or not) was from almost a year ago. I am both too lazy and also too busy to do something new today, so just deal with it. Also, just so you know, most of you … Continue reading From the BitterBenzoac Era to the Bitter Twitter Era
The Rise of the Blanket Fort
When I dream, I often dream big. In the literal sense. Back when I was in school, I would have these dreams about this ginormous school that had 8,000 classes and that would take a speed train just to get from one class to the other. The lockers were the size of a house … Continue reading The Rise of the Blanket Fort
Bitter Complaint Day
Welcome back on the most bitter of days. A Tuesday (worst day of the week) after a holiday (always more work to make up for) after a bitter summer(now begins the bitter fall). Today, I thought I would try something new. If you have ever read my About Page, you know that the reason … Continue reading Bitter Complaint Day
The Keys to Bitter Miscommunication
This weekend, through some lucky circumstances (my daughter being a rockstar despite one half of her parents being a complete bittertastrophe), I got the chance to attend a Seattle Seahawks pre-season game, much to the chagrin of many people around me who are actual Seahawks fans. They are the most popular ticket around town (even … Continue reading The Keys to Bitter Miscommunication
Raining on your Parade Gifs
It's another Friday and I'm sure you all have some great expectations about what you are going to do this weekend. Maybe you will go to the beach, see a new movie, or go camping. Before you go and get all excited about your weekend and all your high expectations for it, let me go ahead … Continue reading Raining on your Parade Gifs
Forecasting Friday Bitter Giftures
I'm not good at a lot of things. I can't snowboard (at least that I know of), I keep my desk arranged in a way that allows important things to get lost, and I am certainly not good at smiling. They say that frowning uses way more muscles than smiling, but have you seen my … Continue reading Forecasting Friday Bitter Giftures
Bitter Film Review of Gravity Starring Sandra Bullock
There are bad movies that are so bad that they are still good. Then there are good movies that are so good they are really bad. Then there are movies like Gravity starring Sandra Bullock and kind of George Clooney. Yes, I am talking about a movie that came out last October and made … Continue reading Bitter Film Review of Gravity Starring Sandra Bullock
Bitter Wastecation
There is a lot of stress going on in this world (most of mine caused by myself) and a lot of ways that people deal with it. Some people like to workout (why again?) others like to use something called retail therapy (whatever the crap that is) and still other like to write. The last … Continue reading Bitter Wastecation
Bitter Advice Thursday, Man(B.A.T.MAN)
I told you I was Batman. You totally didn't believe me! If you read this blog with any regularity, (meaning you read on Monday) I asked the question to you if you wanted Bitter Advice from. I thought it was a joke, because really? Someone wants advice from me? But a few people responded (with … Continue reading Bitter Advice Thursday, Man(B.A.T.MAN)
My Bitter Secret Identity
I'm going to let you all in on a little secret. This one will probably take you a little time to process, but here goes. I'm Batman. Go ahead, gasp at your desk, or your phone or your Ipad. Okay, have you had a chance to breathe? Yes, I know it's a little risky … Continue reading My Bitter Secret Identity
The Bitter Realm Part 2
So, I did a post last week about leaving this realm and going to another because doing stuff in this realm is hard and I'm laaazy. This is the continuation of that post, which bored and astounded no one. If you want something to put you to sleep, read the first part right here. If … Continue reading The Bitter Realm Part 2
Bitter Advice Column
Hello bitter people who occasionally read my blog. I have a question for you. Yeah you. You know. The one that reads this because you are bored at work and you have no access to anything on the internet but WordPress.... Yeah you. One commenter of my blog suggested that I am really good at giving … Continue reading Bitter Advice Column
Hitting a Wall Friday Giftures
You know how when you get to Friday and you've just given everything you can and you just can't give anymore? Well, I usually feel like that by Monday, so you can imagine how little I care by today. Sometimes you've just got to suck it up and be bitterly done on Friday and slump … Continue reading Hitting a Wall Friday Giftures
The Bitter Realm Part 1
After much contemplation (day dreaming at work) and coming to realization that I can't stand anyone anymore, I have decided that I have had enough of this realm. This earth has too much gravity (it's always holding me down) and the trees (with their fancy leaves and their condescending looks from above)have ruled here too long. I'm … Continue reading The Bitter Realm Part 1
In case you missed it…because you were busy getting lost in the forest
On the weekends, I rarely venture off the land mass known as leather couch island, but for some reason some miniature life form kept brow beating me to leave the island as as he does from time to time. Instead of continuing to allow my unshaven brows to receive a Mike Tyson like beating, I … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you were busy getting lost in the forest
Bitter Friday Jerktures
Hey Bitter human people (and the rest of you..). It freaking Friday and it is time to start acting like a freaking jerk. (So like I act every day. I have a few suggestions in case you need some.) Be mean to your neighbors, slow down significantly in in fast lane on the freeway, buy … Continue reading Bitter Friday Jerktures
Ben's Bitter Blog 