I am in an undisclosed location that absolutely does not rhyme with DUtah, under strict orders by myself to not to do work, but the Mr. Work Enforcer (me) never said anything about blogging, even though it is a lot of work. I'm in an overground bunker that they call houses here, that has … Continue reading In case you missed it, because I missed doing it
comedy
The Keys to Becoming a Better Bitterer
As the internet's number 2(because who is more bitter than someone who is only second best) leading expert in Bitterness, I have not once been asked to give a lecture or speech on how it is done. When I figured out that people had absolutely no desire to learn the bitter trade, that is when … Continue reading The Keys to Becoming a Better Bitterer
In case you missed…In case you missed it from last week bitterness
Talk about boring and meta. Just when you thought this blog couldn't be any more boring, I decided to do an in case you missed it, about an in case you missed it that I missed doing last week. Confused and zoning out yet? Good. Now I can just remind myself of what I did … Continue reading In case you missed…In case you missed it from last week bitterness
Tired Friday Gifture Bitterness
I don't know if it is the fact that daylight savings time happened this week, or that the fact that I have been asked to do work at my job this week, or that I just decided to not sleep this week, but I'm tired. The only tired I want to do is Retired. And … Continue reading Tired Friday Gifture Bitterness
2 Years, and 300 posts of Bitterness
Back on March 8, 2012, I was pretty bitter. Just like every other day, but this day, I had enough of anonymously being bitter. I had complained one too many times about how hardcore my job sucked to my co-workers and so they called started calling me Bitter Ben. So on that day, I found … Continue reading 2 Years, and 300 posts of Bitterness
It’s I Don’t Fricken Care Friday Giftures
It's Frickin Friday and I don't care. I don't care about work, or science or what I cram down my pie hole. And by that I mean Pizza. I'm gonna slap some tomato sauce or paste or whatever on some crust, lots and lots of cheese, whatever kind, and pepperoni, put it in an oven, … Continue reading It’s I Don’t Fricken Care Friday Giftures
My terrible interview with James Lipton on Inside the Bitter Actor’s Studio
As you may know, I was recently preparing my speech for my nomination to get into the Bitter Hall of Fame. Though I was nominated, I didn't get in. As per normal, I got within in one vote of getting in and I blame the people who don't follow my blog. To say I am bitter about it is an … Continue reading My terrible interview with James Lipton on Inside the Bitter Actor’s Studio
In case you missed it…because you were watching some award losing movies
Welcome to the off orange colored carpet, where we welcome all the really bad stars of really bad movies. As you know almost every single person either nominated or not nominated loses, so let us really focus on how much a bunch of losers we all really are. To do so, let's rehash old(all … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you were watching some award losing movies
Winning the Complaining Game
Some people think that America's pastime is baseball, lacrosse, or barbequing on the Fourth of July. Sure, those things are all pretty American, but those things on occupy our time when we have leisure time. I don't know about you, but I spend most of my time at work dreaming about leisure time, that other things … Continue reading Winning the Complaining Game
In case you missed it…because you were reading the comics
Back in the old days, when I was just a little bitter chump, one of my lazy Sunday afternoon activities was reading this thing called a newspaper, which was printed on paper. Besides making a horrible mess on your hands, it was also the punchline of a really horrible joke. Which reminds me. What's black … Continue reading In case you missed it…because you were reading the comics
The Pressures of Fitting Out
I know you've all been suffering through the really cold cold out there, for which you should be really bitter, but not near as much as me. This guy right here, with the two thumbs pointing up at him, had to go outside yesterday and start my car early. Then I had to use the scraper thing to get a thin … Continue reading The Pressures of Fitting Out
Clock Bitterness
I am a busy person. I have many duties to avoid at work, and when I come home a television that has all this programming that needs my attention. In between, I have a phone has all these apps that constantly need updating with Tweets(last one 4 days ago), Facebook likes(don't really like anything about … Continue reading Clock Bitterness
Bitter Picture of the Week
As any long time follower of this blog would know, I don't love math very much at all. It is too exact and sensical. It makes the universe what it is and it is too hard. I get that 1+1 is three and all that, but after that it get all kinds of non sensey … Continue reading Bitter Picture of the Week
100th blog post bitterness
It all started out with a dream. It was a bitter dream, but nonetheless a good bitter dream. I wanted to show that everywhere you look, everywhere you are, everyone you know, there is something bitter to be about. I know I have just scratched the surface of the bitterness in this world, but I … Continue reading 100th blog post bitterness
Evil Genius Bitterness
As an evil genius who is also bitter I am always looking for minions, but lately I haven't been able to find the quality of minnions that is required to do all my work while I laugh maniacally. My old channels of finding minnions just isn't working out so I decided to try the old … Continue reading Evil Genius Bitterness
How to waste your entire life Bitterness
If there is something that I am good at besides being bitter about something all the time, it is being lazy. I'm not as good as I used to be, but I have lots of experience. Someone that is probably smart once said "Write what you know." So of course, I write this blog … Continue reading How to waste your entire life Bitterness
Money Bitterness
When I was but a young budding bitterling in elementary school, I learned about this thing called money. Back then it was just a bunch of semi-silver, copper and green paper. A teacher probably told me that it had a value of some sort and then I probably shrugged and moved on to trading baseball … Continue reading Money Bitterness
Medical Science Bitterness
Not long ago, (last week in fact) I did a post about it being cold out and how when it is cold out, it makes us do crazy things, like sit indoors with other people. For this reason, germs of one person seem to be in the same room as other people and sometimes those … Continue reading Medical Science Bitterness
Bitter thought of the week
You want to know what makes me so bitter? When it is raining down so hard that there are huge puddles on the street next to the sidewalk. I am just about to go medievel on one when I see a person walking on the sidewalk and it makes me hesitate...before I drench them.
Bitterest Place on Earth – Universal Studios – Part 6 The end
The last of an epic 6 part Universal/Disney Bitterness Series. As long as this is to read, you will want to stick around until the the very end. Remember when you were young and, after toiling for 9 long months in the slammer (school) you were able to experience the first day of summer? You … Continue reading Bitterest Place on Earth – Universal Studios – Part 6 The end
Ben's Bitter Blog 