There is probably some sort of reason why I get up at 5:30 in the morning, fall asleep in the shower, put some clothes on, shave this freaking face, get in a car, hop on the train with like a billion people that give me bitter stares, get off the train and walk like 15 … Continue reading Dangling that Bitter Carrot
Bitterness
Least Favorite Day of the Week Giftures
I know you guys have been dreading this day all week. Friday's are the worst I know. You had your stressed out Monday where you forgot to do your assignment, then Tuesday when you had to wait in line all day, then Wednesday where you had to figure out how to make Miley leave the … Continue reading Least Favorite Day of the Week Giftures
I Feel A Disturbance In the Bitterness Today
Hey everyone, I would not be the world's leading authority on bitterness if I didn't post something today. Since I had my head in the sand(by that I mean head leaned over pretending to do paper while actually sleeping) working on a paper about social media, I wasn't able to watch the news or read … Continue reading I Feel A Disturbance In the Bitterness Today
The Ultimate Bittersurvivor
Remember that game show Survivor? Do you remember how they placed people on an island with only a few provisions? They had to fend for food, and make their own shelter and compete in challenges against another team of survivors and then they had to vote one off every week. I think Tom Hanks was … Continue reading The Ultimate Bittersurvivor
Cursed Friday Giftures
As you probably have heard, the Cubs won the World Series the other night. If you haven't it's because you were hiding in a bunker for the last 108 years and didn't know that it was such a big deal. If you were hiding in a bunker, welcome back. A lot has happened since you … Continue reading Cursed Friday Giftures
Bitter Haunted Houses
It's that bitter time of the year where stinky little goblins dressed up as kids dressed up as hoodlums start invading neighborhoods and asking for free candy. Holding their little pillowcases out, saying Trick or Treat. They are trying to get something from my good candy stash, but I know better than that. I always … Continue reading Bitter Haunted Houses
Bitter Bending Machines Friday Giftures
Vending machines are way of life for many. People are so busy with their stupid jobs or running from work to school to practice to the grocery store to practice to home, that they don't have time to sit down and eat a meal. Well, it's like that for all of you, I assume. … Continue reading Bitter Bending Machines Friday Giftures
My Bitter Exotic Travel
Judging by all the things I've been talking about doing lately, you probably think I've been working really hard. You know, like sitting in the stands watching football, or sitting in class pretending to pay attention with my eyes closed. Or sitting in a study area, pretending to type papers, or sitting in our van … Continue reading My Bitter Exotic Travel
Bitter Rivalry of the Week – Nephew vs. Nephew
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7xG9TfteJ0 I've talked a lot about football lately, which is kind of crazy to me, because I only have a passing interest in it. I enjoy watching the long pass plays, but you know the thing about football? Pro football is owned by billionaires, played my millionaires, and fantasy played by thousandaires. I get them … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week – Nephew vs. Nephew
Scary Season Friday Giftures
According to my daughter, we are in spooky season. It's kind of funny that she seems to like it so much considering that she is afraid of just about everything. But hey, aren't we all? Afraid of rejection, and fear itself and hair in our food? If it wasn't for all of the stuff … Continue reading Scary Season Friday Giftures
Humans are not meant to work in groups
Let's say you are on an African safari. You know, when you can scrape together $5000 for a trip. Let's say you actually remembered your binoculars too. So you pull out those new $200 pair of binoculars on your Safari and you see a pack of lions far enough away that they can't reasonably catch … Continue reading Humans are not meant to work in groups
Birthday Bitterness Friday Giftures
Once again another birthday came and went and I got nothing. I don't know what everyone's problem is, but I'm getting a little sick of my son having a birthday and no one getting me any presents. It's kind of selfish that everyone pays attention to him and not me all day. I mean … Continue reading Birthday Bitterness Friday Giftures
Bitter Viral Post
I'm not sure why so many people are going to share this post, because the content is just terrible. It's not funny or inspirational or worth anyone's time, but for some reason you want to share it with your friends. It has nothing to do with the fact that I am hypnotizing you, because I … Continue reading Bitter Viral Post
The Prodigal Son Returns Friday Giftures
They say absence makes the heart grows fonder and most of the time that totally isn't true. Think about it, when you leave your co-workers, do you miss them so bad that you forgo any of your weekend plans to be with them? If you do, you should probably get another job, because you … Continue reading The Prodigal Son Returns Friday Giftures
Bitter Ben Branding
I've been paying way too much attention in class which is kind of disappointing because I thought I would come to this school and just slide right into my old freshman year habits, which was sleep in all the time, play pranks on the other dorm hall and flunk classes with my sunglasses on. Apparently … Continue reading Bitter Ben Branding
Screw it up Friday Giftures
Mercury must have been covered up by Neptune, and Saturn must have put a ring on Pluto on the day I was doing my school schedule, because somehow I found a way to get a Friday completely free on my class schedule. This opportunity only comes around once in a lifetime, so I have … Continue reading Screw it up Friday Giftures
8000 Bitter Followers, A Prize and a Demand of all my Followers
It's been a long time coming, but the 8000th lunatic has finally followed my blog. Congratulations to you, The Secret Shopper blog for becoming the 8000th follower. Because you are the 8000th, you have won a new car. It should be arriving in your parking lot in a few days. The only problem is that … Continue reading 8000 Bitter Followers, A Prize and a Demand of all my Followers
Tornado Friday Giftures
I am so far behind on the news, that I just found out that not far from here, north of Salt Lake, there was a tornado that caused a quite a stir. Doesn't surprise me in the least because there has been a tornado of activity around here, which sucks because I am a … Continue reading Tornado Friday Giftures
My Bitter Expendable Life
In the midst of all of it, the craziness, the new classes, the new schedule, the getting up at 5:30 am in the morning again, to the going to bed at midnight, to the projects, the football practice and homework times 3, I found time to watch of all movies, The Expendables 3. Let's go … Continue reading My Bitter Expendable Life
Rolling the Dice Friday Giftures
I feel like I failed you this week. Not only have I done almost no posting, but I also did a super serious one that hardly contained any bitterness other than to be bitter about younger people than me, trying to teach me something. I don't know if it was opposite day, or I … Continue reading Rolling the Dice Friday Giftures
Ben's Bitter Blog 