The quadratic equation of the hypotemus is the 12th degree of the 90 degree of the pathergerium theorum. I’m easily categorized… in the can’t stand math category.
As any long time follower of this blog would know, I don’t love math very much at all. It is too exact and sensical. It makes the universe what it is and it is too hard. I get that 1+1 is three and all that, but after that it get all kinds of non sensey to me. Which is weird because math is always supposed to make sense. Anyways, I think I learned something about the above picture and how things are supposed to be along an axis and such fun stuff like that (and by learned I mean the words from a teacher entered my ears. Is that learning?). I think these things are called quadrants and they are supposed to correspond to things.
So as you can see everyone in the world somehow fits into this small 8 1/2 by 11 piece of paper. Allegedly, everyone is supposed to be a combination of either angry, calm, selfish or generous. I disagree with this chart. I don’t fit on this chart anywhere at all. It is correct that I get angry sometimes, but you know, everyone does. It is also true that I am selfish all the time. What, like being selfish is really hard? If it is selfish to sit on the couch while other people do things like work and stuff, then get out the brushes and paint me selfish. The dot on there calls me lonely, scared and bitter. Pffftt. Not lonely, not scared. Just bitter. So take your four quadrants and stick them up your math equation, higher learning! You can’t categorize me. I am a unique, angry, bitter person that you can’t cage!
Arrrggghhh
Bitter Ben
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Ben's Bitter Blog 
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“Get out the brushes and paint me selfish”
^ your bitterness cannot be bisected.
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I definitely don’t want to be disected. So yes, leave my bitterness alone.
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Agreed. If I want 1 + 1 to equal 3, it should. That’s all I’m saying. Also Mrs. Michaels, if you are up late searching “math” tonight because you are evil and happen to run across this – I hope a rhombus falls on your head.
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Yeah, Mrs. Michaels, whoever you are. Get to bed and don’t look for math on the internet. It doesn’t suit you.
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You are so unique you cannot be plotted!! I think this is a brilliant quality to have.
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Being off the charts would be great if it were for my sales of my best selling novel!
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You are wild…like the stallion. I am following you on Twitter now. Bring it on (as far as a Twitter feud). I am ticking_tocking.
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I think I am following you now. It clicked follow on my phone and it isn’t always accurate. The feud will start as soon as I get a moment to show some bitterness.
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And where is sassy on this chart????
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It is equidistant between bitter, sarcastic and snarky.
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Ah. Very well, then.
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if i knew what color selfish was, then i would bring the paint..i’m just teasing,it would be the opposite color of selfish. you are not selfish.
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I’m very selfish. It is kind of a dark shade of red. So bring that and some primer and we can do some painting.
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lol,ok i will , but i imagined it was going to be some shade of blue.
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You poets with your shades of blue, just don’t bring any shades of grey.
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lol.. you’re a poet, right there . i’m not, but feb. is haiku month.
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How dare you accuse me of being a poet. I can’t even compete in an epic rap battle. How could I be a poet?
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i’m sorry,lol, but you were very deep with the blues and the grays there. i just love math, unlike you and that 5-7-5 syllable haiku…
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So the truth comes out! You are a math lover! Well, all can be forgiven if you send me some oreo ice cream.
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yes, i admit that. i guess you didn’t watch the tv show numbers, since you hate math.
oh ,it’s oreo ice cream. i thought it was vanilla, with oreo cookies…i’ll send you some.
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You are wrong. I did watch the show numb3rs. I love watching smart people do really smart things. I makes me bitter. Just make sure when you send me the ice cream it isn’t melted. Or perhaps you can feature it on your menu in your Bob’s Burgers.
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i was going to type something about ice cream melting, but i am a slow typer,so i left it out and that makes me bitter.
yes i will try to turn it into a burger, but it may take a real poet.
color me wrong.i liked numbers .why did it have to end.
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I’m sorry that your show Numb3rs was cancelled. I got over it somehow. What I don’t like is that no one watches Community. If they don’t start, it will get cancelled and I will have something to be bitter about.
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i noticed .you are very good at bits.
thank-you. it’s alright, because i have a friend who has the same job , and same name.
i hate to tell you,but i fall asleep when i watch community and look at the clock to see how much longer it will go on.
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I agree! Math does not make sense. Once you start mixing the alphabet with numbers… no. Not okay. That is why I’m a comm major and I can bullshit anything or any paper I need to. Words are much nicer than numbers.
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The thing that makes me bitter though is the fact that these people that do know math are the ones ruling over us. Carl Sagan, Bill Gates, etc. The creative people like us have to either get famous, or work as low paid artists. Rude math people getting high paying jobs.
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AGREED! Damn those math people. So frustrating. They experience the benefit immediately while us creatives are working out asses off…
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Yeah, leave us alone you math nerds that make all your money!
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Exactly! I’m happy with my artistic freedom! Oh wait…
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It’s time to flip the script and make the creative people the ones that always get the money and the boring accounting and math people to suffer.
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I agree 100%!
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