As you know, my fitness program is less about walking or moving and more about "fitness whole pizza in mouth" kind of program. If moving around and getting fit was my default mode instead of resting for 8 hours at night, then I might like it. Unfortunately, I think my son has followed in my … Continue reading Bitter Sisyphean Weekend Friday Giftures
brink of collapse
Bananas Bitter Friday Giftures
Remember when I talked about us living in a simulation a little while ago? Probably not, because you don't really think about my posts after you read them. Living in a simulation doesn't really make sense right? But then you watched the Matrix and you started to believe. One of the ways the Matrix taught … Continue reading Bananas Bitter Friday Giftures
Difficulty Settings Bitter Friday Giftures
I used to be young. When I was that, I used to be really good at video games. There was this Mega Man game that I played once and really liked it and when screenshots of Mega Man 2 came out, I was just floored. At the time, they were bleeding edge graphics and I … Continue reading Difficulty Settings Bitter Friday Giftures
Underground Lair Bitter Friday Giftures
We've all lost a lot in the pandemic. Lost lives, lost jobs, lost businesses, lost freedoms and lost breathing (you know from those dang masks). All I know is that I'm never wearing one of those things again. I've personally lost a lot of things since the pandemic started too. I'm still missing one of … Continue reading Underground Lair Bitter Friday Giftures
Road Trippin Bitter Friday Giftures
The road trip movie is a standard Hollywood movie right of passage. Besides a couple of exceptions, (Vacation, Tommy Boy, Dumb and Dumber) they are pretty formulaic and kind of an excuse for terrible and absurd things to happen. Then at the end of the horrific trip, the participants are supposed to have learned something … Continue reading Road Trippin Bitter Friday Giftures
Bitter Giving
Thanksgiving is in a few days, in case you forgot or don't live around where I do. For many, it is a time to reflect about the sales you have to go to on Black Friday, before you cram as much food as you can down your turkey hole, watch football all day and do … Continue reading Bitter Giving
Things you are Bitterly Sick Of (Besides my Blog)
I'm sure some people are going to claim they had a good holiday and they got everything they wanted and did everything they wanted and got along so well with their families or had some good time away. But as you know, being bitter is about thinking about things in a whole different way than … Continue reading Things you are Bitterly Sick Of (Besides my Blog)
The Bitter Owner’s Manual
Some people I know like to build Legos. Or rebuild engines. Or fix computers. Or put together furniture. Or mend relationships. For some reason, when they do these things, they think it brings some sort of order to the universe. It doesn't. What they don't know is that it brings something evil screaming into the … Continue reading The Bitter Owner’s Manual
Glutton for Punishment Giftures
Every afternoon, I leave my crazy job for a little bit and go to the break room. I grab my smart phone and turn on the big screen TV and I watch that game show called Let's Make a Deal. You know, the one where people dress up like deranged lunatics on Halloween so they … Continue reading Glutton for Punishment Giftures
Clothes need to start doing more
Smart phones are useful because they do like more than one thing. They actually do like 3 things. They text (with your permission, of course) they run apps, and they run the internet like a mini-boss. If you have a cool smart phone and don't depend on it to ignore people on a regular basis, you … Continue reading Clothes need to start doing more
Bitter Sell Out Giftures
It's Friday, which means we can start talking about what makes us bitter through little moving pictures. As you might now, the Super Bowl is coming up. I guess I could avoid this thing that is annoying me by just turning the station, but in the last week, I think I've only heard like zero … Continue reading Bitter Sell Out Giftures
Bittermunity
Wanna know why I'm your least favorite blogger? Because I'm around. ALLLL the time. I'm clogging up valuable space on the internet that you could be using for trees, or pictures of your kids, or YouTube. All day on YouTube and the video would move so much faster, if it wasn't for this guy that … Continue reading Bittermunity
Frustration Friday Giftures
Nothing is more frustrating than expecting something good and getting something bad. Like when you expect to skip a rock, but not only does the rock not skip, but you throw it way short and it richochets off a bigger rock and it bounces back and hits you in the knee and causes you to go to surgery. Or when you expect … Continue reading Frustration Friday Giftures
Looking in to the Bitter Future Giftures
BREAKING NEWS! This is your news anchor Captain Obvious! In what is unprecedented news, I've figured something out. We've done a calendar change and the year is now 2015. Do you know what that means? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? It means, Marty McFly and Doc Brown are going to be visiting Hill Valley … Continue reading Looking in to the Bitter Future Giftures
How to Solve Your Bitter Energy Crisis
This last Saturday, I was convinced that I was the only person in the tri-state area(Washington, Canada, and Portland) that thought that I would be able to walk in at 9:00 am(or a little after) for the 9 am doorbuster to a get the new Call of Duty game I only kinda wanted for $19.99 at … Continue reading How to Solve Your Bitter Energy Crisis
Lost Blog posts
There are a few routes I take everyday, that I can do them by instinct. Work to home, I've got memorized. Work to Pizza, I know that by heartburn. Couch to kitchen I can do in my sleepwalk. But when it comes to going from home to work or home to the hardware store or … Continue reading Lost Blog posts
Bitter Friday Gifture Cleanse
Things have happened this week. Things that may never be unseen. Happy people talking about music, and presents and having fun with their families. It has been hard to look at, hard to see. Well, I can't take it anymore. I need to cleanse my mind of all this cheeriness. Well, it is Friday now and … Continue reading Bitter Friday Gifture Cleanse
Bittervational Speech – Everyone is Better Than You
It has been the purpose of this blog from the very beginning to help people overcome the heavy weight and burden of being happy all the time. If you don't believe me, go alllll the way back to my very first, terribly written post that introduced the world (by world, I mean my family) … Continue reading Bittervational Speech – Everyone is Better Than You
Lost in The Future – Disney Studios Edition
There's been all kinds of things written about the future. I don't know if you know or care, but when Back to the Future came out in 1985, 30 years in the future was 2015. Back to Future got some of those things right and some way off. No the Cubs still haven't won a … Continue reading Lost in The Future – Disney Studios Edition
Make a walk for the border of Friday Giftures
You know, there are all kinds of people running around these days. The 5K's are almost unlimited in scope from tough mudder's to color runs, to neon runs to running in your undies to the zombie runs to even Krispy Kreme runs. Then there are night runs, early morning runs, runs to the grossery store, … Continue reading Make a walk for the border of Friday Giftures
Ben's Bitter Blog 