http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=watGFxCDq5w I know you people are pretty bad at watching my YouTube videos, as evidenced by the really low amount of people that watched and commented on my videos I did about 1 or two years ago, and the extremely low amount of viralness they have achieved in the YouTube realm, so now that I've … Continue reading Watch This YouTube Video (that may or may not feature your favorite bitter person)
Laziness
The Unmitigated Disasters of Friday Giftures
This week has just been...uggh. I should have expected that though, as it is my least favorite month of the year. The rejections came fast and furious, usually waiting for just the right moment. I get some sort of momentum going then, Schreechhhh! It's comes to a halt by just a few stupidly placed … Continue reading The Unmitigated Disasters of Friday Giftures
Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Daylight Savings vs. Nightlight Savings
Nobody likes a thief. Yet every year, those of us that are forced to change every one of our clocks(I guess Arizona thinks they are so cool because they don't switch back and forth like the rest of us) because some arbitrary time clock boss tells us we have to, we allow time to be … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Daylight Savings vs. Nightlight Savings
St. Bitter Patrick’s Day Friday Giftures
I've never been much of a St. Patrick's Day guy because I don't like being told what color I'm supposed to wear, and I don't like people in my personal space trying to pinch me. And if they pinch me, I should be growing an inch, not because I forgot to wear green. Plus, when … Continue reading St. Bitter Patrick’s Day Friday Giftures
Rejection Bitterness
I used to play NBA Jams when I was in college and I loved it because it was completely unrealistic. If you weren't from my era, NBA Jams was a baskeball video game that was basically two on two with NBA players that could jump 50 feet in their air for dunks and included no … Continue reading Rejection Bitterness
Walking a Tightrope to Friday Giftures
You know those cats that are on those posters that are hanging on a rope and the stupid caption above their head says, "Hold on or something" or "Hang in there, man, you hang in there, you got that McClane?" Well the gifs being presented today are nothing like those motivational moments. These are … Continue reading Walking a Tightrope to Friday Giftures
Guess who wrote 4 posts on this blog for the first time ever 5 years ago today?
I don't know. Someone probably. And also me. I am guessing that literally zero people that are reading this blog right now, read the first 4 posts I wrote that day. You know why I know that? Because the day I wrote my first post, only three people read it, and it was people … Continue reading Guess who wrote 4 posts on this blog for the first time ever 5 years ago today?
The Customer Service around here is horrible…
I've spent quite a lot of time in my career in customer service, which as you know is a really bad thing, because I'm horrible at it. People can sense it with me when I'm on the phone with them. They can feel the gritted teeth, the sarcastic tone, and they can see the eye … Continue reading The Customer Service around here is horrible…
Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Video Games vs. Work
Just like in the video games we play, there is a constant battle of my time between playing video games and doing some sort of work. When crossing the battlefield of time wasters, who will be King of the Hill? The Battle of the Bad Back: My lower back is constantly hurting me. But what … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Video Games vs. Work
That was a close shave…Friday Giftures
I'm not sure where that expression came from. I have been shaving since I was 14, and I've never had a close shave. I've had shaves that have cut, bruised, bled, caused multiple blood spots, and splotches, but never had one close. And for goodness sakes, I shave all the time and somehow it … Continue reading That was a close shave…Friday Giftures
It’s like giving candy to a baby…Bitter Friday Giftures
That whole expression about taking candy from a baby is really kind of obvious. First of all, the little runts really aren't supposed to be eating candy. Especially in those vital first years. And if they are trying to eat it, you are just doing a service for them. Candy would rot all their … Continue reading It’s like giving candy to a baby…Bitter Friday Giftures
Bitter Rivalry of the Week: George Washington vs. Abraham Lincoln
For the first time in 15 years, I won't be working the day after President's Day. This is a good thing, because it used to be the worst day at my old job. It was always a double duty day, because most of the dealer's we worked with didn't get President's Day off, so we … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week: George Washington vs. Abraham Lincoln
Delivering the Facial Friday Giftures
As we embark on the NBA All-Star weekend, we celebrate what the NBA is most famous for. Not the slam dunk or the 3 point shot, or the monster block, but the trash talk. It isn't good enough to dunk on someone, you have to then deliver a well placed insult to the opponent you … Continue reading Delivering the Facial Friday Giftures
F.O.M.I. Bitterness
I have a son who is an extrovert. Somehow in the midst of three other family members who just prefer to skip a party, we got an extrovert who must be around people 24/7 or he will die an instant death (it might have something to do with him being adopted, but that is a … Continue reading F.O.M.I. Bitterness
The Bitter Heart Replacement
For years, I've talked about wanting to become less of a person and more of a robot. Why people want to have so many fleshy people parts is beyond me. I don't know about you, but I would really like to have parts of my body that didn't hurt all the time. My shoulders, my … Continue reading The Bitter Heart Replacement
Friday Day Live on Friday Giftures
Seeing that the ratings on this show have been dipping for a while, I thought we would try something a little different to get the ratings up. Actually, we are going to do pretty much what other shows do when their ratings are dipping. We are going to do a live blog. So starting … Continue reading Friday Day Live on Friday Giftures
My Bitter I.O.W.A. experience
I grew up in South Dakota. As the butt of almost all jokes from other states except from our Northern brethren, North Dakota, it was hard to defend South Dakota. Most states were either bigger, faster, stronger or more famous than us. At least I was from the biggest town in South Dakota, which was … Continue reading My Bitter I.O.W.A. experience
Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Lamborghini’s vs. Tanks
As we all hungrily (airs faced squarely in the air) await the Super Bitter Bowl today, to satiate our appetites for the predictably highest rated program of the year, let us look to one of the more interesting rivalries out there. First up is the the "Lambo" as it is affectionately called, has a mysterious … Continue reading Bitter Rivalry of the Week: Lamborghini’s vs. Tanks
Trending: Bitter Friday Giftures
It's hotter than the trendiest nightclub, cooler than the cold weather the groundhog is predicting for the next 6 weeks, fresher than the bagels at Einsteins Bagels this morning, more bitter than unsweetened chocolate, and more hashtagy trending that Twitter and upwardly blue arrowy than Facebook. Iiiiit's Bitter Friday Giftures.... Though the gifs are … Continue reading Trending: Bitter Friday Giftures
Ben's Bitter Blog 