I don't feel like writing today, because snow is outside and I just can't possibly be expected to write anything. The east coast got their turn last week, so it is the west coast's turn to be lazy this week. So here is my post. It is my Bitter News from the Couch, Volume 7. … Continue reading Lazy Day Bitterness
Fiction
Busting A Move Bitterness
When I was in high school and college, surprisingly, I was a little more athletic than I am now. I know most people are, but for me, it was quite extreme. Yesterday I went to the Rec center so I could accompany my family there, and I spent an hour and a half shooting free … Continue reading Busting A Move Bitterness
Movie Trending Bitter Friday Giftures
Some movies seem to have an impact on the trends of things we buy. Not every movie, but every once in a while movies affect the way people buy certain things or attend certain adventures. I can think of a few examples, and you probably can too if you think hard enough. Like when … Continue reading Movie Trending Bitter Friday Giftures
Bitter Not So Best Seller
When the first Batman movie came out with Micheal Keaton as Batman and Jack Nicholson as the Joker, it was a big deal. Back then it was very rare to get any comic book movie at all, and this was the first legit Batman movie. Sure there was a movie in which Batman fought a … Continue reading Bitter Not So Best Seller
Bitter Parking Spaces
There are a lot of debates out there. I don't normally get into them unless I have huge amounts of ammo for one side, or I care way too passionately about them. For instance, I will talk to you all day long about how the United States of America needs way more federal holidays. Let's … Continue reading Bitter Parking Spaces
Store Discount
Believe it or not, my wife is supportive of my blogging efforts, as long as it doesn't interfere with real work and family duties, which it has from time to time. In the beginning, I didn't even tell her I had a blog because I wasn't sure she would like me writing about bitter … Continue reading Store Discount
Danger Friday Giftures
As the old man in the cave in Legend of Zelda said to Link, "It's dangerous to go alone. Take this." He was just being nice and handing Link a sword so he could survive all the weird acting animals in the world, but I think his advice is pretty strong today. It is … Continue reading Danger Friday Giftures
Unnecessary Jobs
Several years ago, I was up late playing my favorite video game, and my wife was trying to sleep. She woke suddenly and complained about really painful heartburn. Usually, she takes a Tums and feels better afterward. But for some reason, that wasn't working, and she was complaining about intense pain that wasn't going … Continue reading Unnecessary Jobs
Bencademy Awards
I like movies because they are the dressier cousin of TV. While the newest and best movies require you to be some sort of dressed and pay money and get popcorn and sit in a seat that isn't a couch, they don't require you to think too much. Some require you to think if … Continue reading Bencademy Awards
Tidying Up with Bitter Ben
A lot of people are really good at things in their everyday lives that seem pretty inconsequential. Some people are great at doing laundry. They know the right temperature, the best fabric softener and the setting that every piece of clothing should be set at. Other people are amazing at cooking. They have a … Continue reading Tidying Up with Bitter Ben
The Best Handheld Device
When I grew up, we had these things called phones that were just a menace. They had long cords, big circular dials and were only used for actually calling people to talk, which quite frankly is the least good thing about phones. If you wanted to talk to someone that lived far away, … Continue reading The Best Handheld Device
Random Doesn’t Equal Funny
According to my daughter, random doesn't equal funny. Although according to her, she also thinks puns aren't funny. Actually, I think she also just thinks I'm not funny. Yeah, that is it. That wasn't always true though. She used to laugh when I played Peek-A-Boo. I guess the older you get, the less you think … Continue reading Random Doesn’t Equal Funny
Bitter Cancellation
I used to think that you had no choice in a lot of matters. Once you sign up for something, you were part of that thing for life. A year and a half ago, we signed up for Netflix and every month since, whether we watched something or not, they charged us $11 a month. … Continue reading Bitter Cancellation
Graffiti Bitterness
I grew up in an era when video games were brand spanking new and adults had no idea what to think of them. They thought they were toys that needed to be destroyed. I was a big arcade fan growing up and my favorite game to play was Super Mario Brothers. My friend and I … Continue reading Graffiti Bitterness
Lottery Dream Home
I've always been about taking the easy way out. If I was on a call with someone, and things got out of control, I didn't stick with the person and try to figure it out, I either just hung up on them or told them I would call them back and then didn't. If … Continue reading Lottery Dream Home
Instant Regret Bitter Friday Giftures
You know those days when you wake up and you instantly regret waking up? I'm sure I have a lot of dreams that I just don't remember, but I'm almost always sure that the dream is better than the reality. So I wake up, tired, sore, groggy and needing more rest and I instantly … Continue reading Instant Regret Bitter Friday Giftures
Underdog Bitterness
I grew up in a time when Saturday Mornings = watching cartoons. It was a much simpler time in which there were only three channels and on weekdays we were required to either do our homework or go outside and do things a lot. We might have been given a little time to watch one … Continue reading Underdog Bitterness
Vacation Bitterness
I think there are several goals when it comes to being on vacation. The first, most important goal is to forget how to function at work. If you are taking a vacation from your job and you are doing it right, on the day you come back, you should forget the route you take to … Continue reading Vacation Bitterness
Exercise Bitterness
Yesterday I talked about sports and how I used to enjoy them. Today I'm going to talk about how they ruined my life. To get some context, my son is a burgeoning athlete. He is so much bigger than other kids his age, that sometimes it doesn't even seem fair. In fact, in football, I … Continue reading Exercise Bitterness
Trolling
When I was growing up, sports was just kind of my deal. I didn't always love them, but I had a natural skill at some of them, so people always put me in them. I was decent at basketball, volleyball, baseball, long jump (had the school record for a couple of weeks) and was weirdly … Continue reading Trolling