Because you were busy being lazy.
People get busy on the weekend. I get it, there’s a lot of fun and laziness to pack into 2 days. Until the weekend gets longer and the work week gets shorter, (I’m working with Obama on that) there is always going to be a lot of pressure to get in all the laziness and slacking in. So, of course, I understand why you couldn’t possibly take the time to read everything from last week. I’m not bitter about it all. But, seeing that I have nothing better to do (I do have a nap scheduled for later), I will recap the week for you. You are ssoooo welcome.
First up from last week, the Alphabet. The Alphabet in its current iteration has had its run for long enough. It’s time for a new set of letters to take over. An upgrade, a 2.0. At least that is what I suggested last week. Hey, you might or might not agree, but you know, maybe you still use records and 8 tracks to listen to music. Or maybe you still drive a horse to work. That’s cool. Don’t worry about the all new, and much improved Alphabitter.
Things got ratcheted up to an 11 on Friday. Pizza was ordered, sports were watched and people were avoided. The days was intense, so the Giftures had to be intense too. See how in Intensely Bitter Friday Giftures.
Oh and I got Freshly Pressed. And that was about it. Maybe you didn’t miss that much.
I did some Bitter Twitter.
Yeah, you didn’t miss much on Twitter either.
There were a few comments:
On Bitterly Intense Friday Pictures:
“MAAAAAAATTTTTTTRRRRREEEEESSSSSSS
I’m still laughing over it. XD – C. Miller
“Dear Bitterly Intense Ben,
I was looking forward to your Friday GIF post since I discovered it last week – You did not disappoint. I think your bitterness is pleasant & quite enjoy it. Keep up the bitter work & enjoy those naps.” – Properly Ridiculous
“I’m going to start referring to you as the GIF God. I’m amazed at your ability to find these GIFs every single Friday. I have yet to see one reused. This week my favorite is the goalie. It’s such a flop on his part its funny and embarrassing. Congrats on your Fresh Pressed Status! That means you officially are big deal.” –Rynolexson
On Alphabitter:
“I think I spend 90% of my life inspiritated. The other 10% is spent vespitaking and hafalumping.” – Katie
“These are excellent. I am going to start teaching them to my pre-school class tomorrow. They’ve already got AARRGGHHH down, so we’re already ahead of the game…” – Claire
“I’m feeling hafalump right now. In fact, I don’t think I will work at all tomorrow due to my ratsperabz. If the boss begs me to come in I will say ergonoway and then vespitake violently before telling him what I really think of him.” – Marissa Bergen
And now some bonus giftures:
Two bikes are better than one…for falling.
and even better…
This is the best kid show…ever.
So yeah, you didn’t miss much.
ARRRGGGHHHH
Bitter Missed It Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
Eh. I guess I’ll congratulate you on being Freshly Pressed. I’ve been FP FOUR times! Ha. Just kidding. What the eff is that gif with that yellow creature running away from an explosion?? So funny! 😛
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Congrats on your FP’s! You totally deserved all four. I can’t remember reading them, but I’m sure you deserved them.
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I was…only…KIDDING! I’ve never been FP, you silly goose! 😛 At least not yet. 😛
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No way! You fooled me. Now I will never be able to believe a thing you ever say again! Are all those picture you post on your blog just taken from Google? It’s a scandal!
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Haha. I always put my name on the photos I take. And give credit to the ones I use from yahoo or google! You LOLzer!
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Anyone could put names on photos and call them theirs. I think I will just come to your blog and write over your name and steal them for my own nefarious purposes.
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Eh. Go ahead 😛
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I will be world famous for something someone else did. It is my laziest dreams come true!!!
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Haha! I’m sure your parents are so proud of *cough* of you. P
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My parents will be so proud I am getting more money. If it is at the expense of others, all the more better.
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I always feel like such a failure when I comment on your blogs…I do not leave bitter comments; I do however enjoy the bitterness you stand for – So…hopefully I will get over it.
Anyway…I am so happy to see more GIFs…you know how much I love them. The one with the child’s show actually inspired me to start trying for another baby so I can watch it with him/her.
That’s not true. But…I did laugh.
This post also introduced me to your twitter…lovely. I’d say this post was a total success…for me anyway.
Happy Tuesday, Mr. Bitter.
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Hey failure comes with the territory around here. So I’m glad you are adjusting. I think what you need to do when you have a baby in the future is to put the computer up to your belly and show it gifs. Then you know it will be properly trained when it comes out of your belly.
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P.S. – LOVE THE NEW format/theme whatever…love the crayon drawing of Bitter Ben’s house!! Did a homeless guy draw that? LOL…
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That picture was done by one of my blog friends that dedicated a whole post to my bitterness. I liked it so much that I asked if I could use it for my blog. I don’t think she was homeless, no….
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LOL…I was kidding about the “homeless” part because I thought you’d drawn it. How cool one of your fans drew it for you! 🙂 Hope you’re having a not-so-bitter day!
TB
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That’s okay I forgive you. I actually loved that she did it. I was pretty thankful that she let me use it too.
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OMG, Ben! WATCH IT…that almost sounded like a non-bitter comment! Someone might mistake you for a NICE guy and not BITTER BEN…LOL…:)
~TB
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That comment must have been hijacked by my twin, Courteous Ken. Don’t listen to him.
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LOL! Idk…he sounded JUST LIKE YOU! 🙂
TB
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Well, he might sound like me, but no way. Wasn’t me.
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LOL.
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HOW COOL YOU GOT FRESHLY PRESSED! How did that happen to a slacker like you? Did you pay someone? JUST KIDDING! You’re awesome, and I’m really happy for you!! Can’t wait to read that one…except, well, I didn’t get enough accomplished last week and/or enough slacking over the weekend, so I’ll save your Press-Winning Post for after watching my toenails grow/spying on my neighbor/watching Orphan Black AGAIN/watching my dryer spin/eating stale popcorn/talking to my stuffed animals/doing my nails and rearranging my sock drawer! 🙂
TENACIOUS BITCH …and her band of truth-spouting hippies
P.S. I agree with you about the alphabet. Maybe, it should start with the letter “F”? 🙂
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The Alphabitter better have a few more F’s. And don’t worry, take your time getting over to the Pressly post. Not a huge rush.
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I just realized the hafalumping might be kind of close to Heffalump, which may upset the creators of Winnie the Pooh.
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I’m not a fan of Whiny the Pooh, so I would be okay with upsetting them. I may have to reconsider the word though cause I don’t want anyone to associate Pooh with me.
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Best Kid Show Ever gif… I wanna have them at my next birthday party.
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Only if the explosions come with them.
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Oh yeah, otherwise, what’d be the point?
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They wouldn’t be near as fun if there weren’t explosions.
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Hey – – happy belated birthday and big congrats on Freshly Pressed. What number is that for you now? You seem to be bringing more and more smiles to people with your bitterness. Do you think that is counterproductive?
ps. Can you also work with Obama on the Affordable Care Act?
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If I worked on Obama’s health care, it would be even more bitter than it is now.
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Congratulations on being Freshly Pressed!!!!! You deserve it, you’re the Bitter King!
I mean that!
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Might as well be king of something right?
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😉
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Congrats on the FP, that post was great! 🙂
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I guess someone had to get pressed.
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You suck for getting freshly pressed. I crush your head.
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I’m like the worst candidate for it. I am going to protest, while I get my head crushed.
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omg i loved the kid show scene so much.
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That is why it is the best kids show.
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You wish to lower the amount of letters. What if we were Chinese. Thousands of letters and so many brush stokes. Which letters would you curtail? Q is my choice. Never liked it because it has a partner in U. There is Qi but it rarely used and also Qat which is never used. Get rid of Qu and get rid of quiz and quicksand and queen and quantum leap. No more, out Q and begone.
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I’ll just get rid of other alphabets and make mine the only one.
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excellent point of view. I also feel capitals need to disappear. That would make sense. What do you think:?
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you need to stop using capitals right away.
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Being that this is the 3rd time I have made it into the Bitter Comments section I almost forgot to be bitter over the fact that you have been Freshly Pressed twice while this honor still eludes me. Feel an ARRRGGGHHHH coming on.
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It’s about time you got Freshly Pressed. I’ll have a word with that one guy who did that one thing and see if I can help get you Pressed. Which one do you want me to recommend.
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I missed it because I’m writing really bad poetry for NaPoWriMo–all month. Mostly dog and cat stuff.
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I should have known that is what everyone was up to. Maybe that is the subject of the next Missed it blog.
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Congrats on another pressing and your 11 day. Sorry, I haven’t been paying attention to your posts and I’m sure that will add to your bitterness. I’ll work to be better at paying attention to you in the coming weeks. Maybe.
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No need to work at it. If it happens to come up in your reader, feel free, but if you are feeling bitter, then you better know where to come.
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Reblogged this on brianatuheire.
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I have bitterly missed you. Congrats on being Freshly Pressed. I’m sure it made you quite bitter, which you truly deserve 😉
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I do truly deserve to be bitter. So what have you been up too? Still keeping a steady blog?
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Yup, I’m still blogging, once or twice a week with original posts. The rest are reblogs or blog tours. I would like to write more original posts, but, you know, I’d like to be wealthy too 😉
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Well, I’m bitter to hear that. I am thinking of scaling back one post a week. So I’ll just have Friday Gifs, a recap and 1 original post. They tucker me out!
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Indeed, writing posts is hard … and bitter … work 😉
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We might as well get paid for as much work we do.
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That would be so sweet, not bitter at all!
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Not if the money is laundered.
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lol 😉
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