I am in an undisclosed location that absolutely does not rhyme with DUtah, under strict orders by myself to not to do work, but the Mr. Work Enforcer (me) never said anything about blogging, even though it is a lot of work. I’m in an overground bunker that they call houses here, that has a couch that I am laying on most of the day. This makes me bitter because of course, I should be on the couch all day, not just most of it. Yesterday, my family interfered with me blogging because “they wanted to spend time with me”. My question to them is “Why?” Have they ever met me? Haven’t they enjoyed their time when I’ve ignored them? And now they want to come to this undisclosed location and spend more time together? Weirdos.
So here is what both you and I missed from last week.
I started by writing an April Fool’s Post that fooled about approximately 0.00 people. The thing that made me bitter is that 100% of the people were not sad to see me go. Maybe it is time to retire. Or not, because I just want to annoy everyone who wasn’t sad to see me go. So I’m gonna not leave on purpose.
If that weren’t bad enough, I offered advice on how to become better at being bitter. It comes naturally to me and some of the more entrenched Bitter Followers, but the rookies needed some help to and I was not glad at all to offer it.
I don’t know what would have caused me to be in attack mode on Friday’s Giftures. Maybe it was the way I attacked the pizza at lunch or the way I attacked my tire when it went flat, but I was pretty much in attack mode. And nobody wants that.
There were some bitter Twittering:
I got bitter comments:
On Friday Giftures:
“The way that guy reacted to the lion hug is how I react to all hugs.
Bitter Freaking Ben