Top 10 Lists of all Top 10 Lists I’m on BFG’s

Back in 1996, the NBA released their list of the Top 50 players of all time and as soon as they did, they created a debate among fans. It got them what they wanted, which was a lot of attention to the game. At the time, most people agreed that Michael Jordan was the GOAT, and that was that. A few people would debate that Magic, or Wilt or Bill Russell might have been the best, but the rest of the Top 50 started a huge debate amongst fans. Commentators commentated, sports journalists, journalized and writers wrote. Fans even fan-boyed and fan-girled for their favorites to rank higher and others to rank lower. I don’t know if that is when the whole GOAT thing started or when everyone started creating Top 100, 50 or Top 10 lists, but that is when it started becoming a part of life for me.

For the record, I think David Robinson is the GOAT, because he was my favorite players. His career got cut short by bad knees and interest in living life after the NBA, seeing that he had actual interests outside the game. He had the greatest combination of speed, size and strength, and pure good guyness in the history of the NBA. He may not have been as good as a few others on the list, but I would argue that he had the greatest end to an NBA career ever. You can debate that, but you will lose. Micheal Jordan seemed to end his career on a game winner in the NBA Finals, but that was just his second retirement. If you recall, he actually came back to play two forgettable years for the Washington Wizards. Kobe ended his career with a 60-point game, BUT, it was an insignificant regular season game. David Robinson’s final game was winning the NBA Finals, with 13 points, 17 rebounds, and he won it on Father’s Day. Greatest cap ever.

The reason why Top 10 Lists are so prevalent to me, is because right now, a big part of my job is creating Top 10 lists. I run a website that mainly lists the Top 10 supplements in 100’s of categories, so I know what it is like to create Top 10 lists.

Back in the day, before I realized how much I didn’t like people, I thought I wanted to be rich and famous. I still want to be rich, but I definitely don’t want to be famous. Unless it is as a reclusive anonymous author that churns out novels and blogs at a record pace, but lives in cabin far away from people and no one ever figures out my anonymity.

As a famous or rich person, you might be placed on a bunch of Top 10, 50 or 100 Most Something of all time Lists.

Since I’m still toiling away as the Best Bitter Blogger in the world, yet still remain relatively anonymous, you would think that I would never crack a Top 100 List, let alone a Top 10, but you would be wrong. In fact, I’m on quite a few.

Here are some Top 10 Lists I’m currently on:

Top 10 Favorite Kids (or in-laws) of my parents:

  1. My Wife
  2. My brother-in-law
  3. My sister-in-law
  4. My older sister
  5. Me
  6. My youngest brother
  7. My just younger brother
  8. Above’s wife
  9. My younger sister
  10. Her husband

As you can see, I even made the Top 5 on this list, although most of that has to do with my wife carrying me up the list to the Top 5. If it wasn’t for that, and the fact that some kids are actively trying to destroy my parent’s lives, I would probably be 11 of out of the 10.

Another Top 10 List I made :

Top 10 Workers that Missed the Least Days at my Previous Job in Seattle:

  1. Bitter Ben
  2. The Cubicle Walls
  3. That one guy
  4. That other girl
  5. KP
  6. DB
  7. That random person that only worked there for a couple of months
  8. BP (Always took vacation when I wanted to, made me do all her work that I hated)
  9. CS (Constantly sick, always drank coffee, always used kid as an excuse, talked way too much, did way too little)
  10. ZF (Only worked there for a few months, missed more days than I missed NBA starts, IE all of them)

Top 10 Buzzer Beaters in the Renton Stake 2010 Church League Tournament:

  1. Bitter Ben (We were down by 1, our team decided to shoot a three, it bounced off, I rebounded it with 3 seconds left, hit a 10-foot baseline jumper to propel us into the next round of the tournament.)
  2. Nobody else hit a buzzer beater that year
  3. Nobody else hit a buzzer beater the next year
  4. Or the year before
  5. Nobody had a close enough game in 2008.
  6. There was a close game in 2007, but that one ended in a tie, because no one cared
  7. In 2011, there was an overtime game, but the Factoria team blew out the Tiger Mountain team
  8. In 2012, the world was supposed to end according to the Mayan calendar, so everyone played afraid
  9. In 2013, no one could get enough players to come out, so that was considered a lockout year.
  10. In 2014, I decided to retire, so they renamed the Buzzer Beater award, the Bitter Ben award. To this day, no one else has ever claimed it.

The Top 10 2015 Blogger of the Year Award: (This is real by the way) Here’s the link to prove it (scroll all the way to the bottom)

  1. Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund
  2. Our Parenting World
  3. Real Science
  4. Socialite Heights
  5. Watts Up With That?
  6. No other blogs on the list
  7. Bloggers who never cared
  8. Bloggers who weren’t funny
  9. Bloggers who just posted once
  10. Ben’s Bitter Blog

Another note on this one, in the Hall of Fame was The Pioneer Woman, who is my intense bitter rival. She has cookware in Walmart, and a show on HGTV or some other crappy channel. I’m bitterly jealous of her success, so every time I see her cookware in Walmart, I hide it near the toilet paper or dirty car parts.

Top 10 Most Wanted to Stop Blogging

  1. Gweneth Paltrow
  2. Pioneer Woman
  3. Lady Gaga
  4. Miley Cyrus
  5. Katy Perry
  6. Beyonce
  7. Kim Kardashian West
  8. Khloe Kardashian East
  9. Kourtney Kardashian South
  10. Bitter Ben

Sadly, I only barely made it into the Top 10, so I decided to only stop if everyone else on the lists stops first. They’ve all stopped you say? Never mind, I’m going to haunt you forever with my bitter blogs..

Top 10 Bitter Friday Giftures…and a bonus 2, because I’m generous…

According to NBA statistics...

…Michael Jordan only has 9 career buzzer beaters, so I’m only 8 away from the record.

I should mention that I’m also on the #1 on the Top 10 list…

…for times shoveling our driveway while growing up.

Trampolines are the Top 10 for most dangerous…

…and most hilarious for giftures.

Definitely on the Top 10…

…of birthday party fires.

Here’s not the best way…

…to make sure the coke doesn’t make a mess.

Top 10 most efficient way…

…to take out two kids with one throw.

Batman probably makes the Top 10 list…

…of judges.

This one probably doesn’t even make…

…the Top 100 on best falls.

More like…

…one in a million.

This garbage man…

…is definitely trending.

This cat is making…

…some big moves.

As far as my Top 10 Blog Posts…

…this one is on the All-Time Worst List.

Now that you know it is possible to make a Top 10 List, or a Bottom 10 list, which list do you make the Top 10 on?

ARRGGGHHHHHH

Bitter Top 10 Ben

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6 thoughts on “Top 10 Lists of all Top 10 Lists I’m on BFG’s

  1. I usually just miss the cut on the Top 10 lists, so I’m Number 11. That’s okay, because people on the Top 10 have way too much pressure to stay in the Top 10.

    Liked by 1 person

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