When Dwight Shrute of The Office was at Phyllis' wedding, he proclaimed, "There's too many people in this world. We need a new plague." I always agreed with him, and we finally found it. People are starting to realize that we don't need to be around each other as much as we thought, and … Continue reading The World has never been more clean Bitter Friday Giftures
Bodycam for Work Bitter Friday Giftures
I get a lot of ideas and inspiration from Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert), who is actually a pretty brilliant guy, with a good sense of humor. I'm much like him, except for his brilliance and sense of humor. Anyway, recently he had a series of Dilberts where Dilbert wore a work bodycam so … Continue reading Bodycam for Work Bitter Friday Giftures
Balloons Are the Worst Bitter Friday Giftures
A couple of weeks ago, we were trying to do a nice surprise for my daughter for her birthday. I had spent most of the morning and afternoon at a 7 on 7 football tournament, so I was dog tired from all the heat, but my wife wanted me to immediately get up and … Continue reading Balloons Are the Worst Bitter Friday Giftures
Swift Kick in the Bitter Friday Giftures
I don't know if you know it, but your teenager does and they will tell you about it Swiftly. Taylor Swift dropped a surprise album last night, which has kind of become a little trendy for the big singers. I'm sure if I dropped a surprise album last night, it would still be a … Continue reading Swift Kick in the Bitter Friday Giftures
Air Conditioning Bitter Friday Giftures
About a week ago, just like summer clockwork, our air conditioning pooped out during the biggest heatwaves of the summer. It's all about timing right? In at least 4 instances in my life, the air conditioning has done this and that is just counting times I can remember. It just seems to me that … Continue reading Air Conditioning Bitter Friday Giftures
Spreading the Cheer Bitter Friday Giftures
Don't you just love Christmas in July? Yeah, me neither. Hallmark does this thing every year where they try and recapture the magic of Christmas by showing their really bad Christmas specials during the hottest part of the year, July. It's kind of a going against the grain strategy, if you will. In the … Continue reading Spreading the Cheer Bitter Friday Giftures
Eye Contact Bitter Friday Giftures
I've always had trouble with eye contact. I don't know what it is about eye contact, but I think somehow it is related to how confident you are, or something like that. Other times you just don't know the appropriate amount of time you are allowed or supposed to look at someone. It seems … Continue reading Eye Contact Bitter Friday Giftures
Wildfire Bitter Friday Giftures
You know that expression spreading like wildfire? I guess it is talking about how last summer there were a lot of fires and they spread really fast, because people would light a fire and then seconds later a whole forest would burn down. I can't think of anything that has happened this year that … Continue reading Wildfire Bitter Friday Giftures
Supplemental Bitter Saturday Giftures
I recently got a new job (so weird for me I know) and it is helping with social media for a supplement company (you know, for weight lifters). It feels so different for me because I've never been a weight lifter. In fact, the last time I did it was in junior high, and … Continue reading Supplemental Bitter Saturday Giftures
Donation Station Bitter Friday Giftures
As many stores closed in mid-March for the epidemic and we were forced to stay home, many crazy things started happening. One of the more unexpected things that happened was the thrift store closing and people doing some serious spring cleaning while they were at home. The combination of stuff that needed to be … Continue reading Donation Station Bitter Friday Giftures
The Matrix Bitter Friday Giftures
It seems to me that the Matrix hasn't been working very well lately. There must be some sort of glitch that is causing some really unbelievable things. The whole fabric of society seems to be crumbling and the machines are getting worse at covering up that they are responsible. Have you noticed it like … Continue reading The Matrix Bitter Friday Giftures
Autofill Bitter Friday Giftures
My computer and phone have this feature where you can fill out your name, address, and phone number and anytime a form pops up on the internet, it will offer to fill out those things for you. Crazily enough, forms are on the internet all the time. Whether it is a job application, a … Continue reading Autofill Bitter Friday Giftures
Mosquitos Bitter Friday Giftures
Here at Bitter Headquarters, we've always prided ourselves on being bitter about things that most people aren't talking about. Of course, lately, our giftures have been about the stupid virus and all its after-effects. Well, it is time to get back to the little things that bug us. Puns absolutely intended. As you saw … Continue reading Mosquitos Bitter Friday Giftures
School’s Out Forever Bitter Friday Giftures
I remember when I was a kid when we got to May, we were all excited about the prospect of the end of May because it meant that we no longer had to go to school. There was that song that said, "Schooool's out for the summer! School's out forever!" But we had to … Continue reading School’s Out Forever Bitter Friday Giftures
Bill Keeps Asking for All this Money Bitter Friday Giftures
I don't know about you, but month after month, I keep having to pay money just to live. Like in order to live in this house, I gotta give somebody money. In order to get heat, or air, I gotta pay some money. In order to write these Bitter Friday Giftures, I have to … Continue reading Bill Keeps Asking for All this Money Bitter Friday Giftures
Back Pain Ben Bitter Friday Giftures
I have a lot of pain, in a lot of places, all over. I guess that is the fun part of aging. Also for a lifetime of lifting things the wrong way, sleeping on horrible beds and going camping against my will when I was a kid. If only my family stayed in hotels … Continue reading Back Pain Ben Bitter Friday Giftures
20/20 Vision Bitter Friday Giftures
When I was in my early 30's, I was still wearing glasses, as I had been since I was 17. I was growing weary of the feeling of the glasses always pinching my eyebrows and leaving me feeling tired at the end of the day. So I tried the contact lenses. Turns out I'm … Continue reading 20/20 Vision Bitter Friday Giftures
Isolation Bitter Friday Giftures
For so long, I've tried to warn the world to stay away from me. As an introvert, it's always been my goal to keep people away, get my alone time, and just let me create. You can check back to 8 years ago when I first started this blog and see those are the … Continue reading Isolation Bitter Friday Giftures
Air Is Getting Thin Bitter Friday Giftures
For some reason, the anniversary of the day of your birth is always a tricky one. All you want to do is get some nice things, maybe have a cake and spend some lovely time with your family and avoid work. What it turns out to be usually is a never-ending string of people … Continue reading Air Is Getting Thin Bitter Friday Giftures
47 Reasons to be Bitter
Every year since I was 40, and started this blog, I've been celebrating my birthday by giving you all reasons to be bitter. As a lifelong bitteratarian, I've always had many reasons, but 2020 has given us a plethora of new reasons. We all know that Corona and earthquakes and floods have obviously inundated … Continue reading 47 Reasons to be Bitter
