Don’t mess with Dwight.
As you all should know, I am a huge fan of The Office. Ever since I saw the episode where the people of Dunder Mifflin Scranton go to the lake for the Beach Games while Michael sneakily tries to pick his replacement, I was hooked. My favorite part was when Dwight picks his team and calls then the Gryfindors after Harry Potter’s house. Of course, Jim can’t possibly let Dwight off the hook with such an awesome name, so he calls his team Voldemort. Dwight says back, “You must say “He who must not be named.”
Jim taunts him again by starting the chant, “Voldemort, Voldemort, Voldemort.” Needless to say, I continued watching the series until its completion. Thankfully, I had most of the show on DVD or Blu-Ray and could easily re-watch it. I didn’t though, for a little while. The ending was amazing and it was hard to see going back to it for a little while. Plus, there were other shows, right? Parks and Rec had great potential (though I never watched it until last year) and Community came on the air and was a breath of fresh air. I super loved it and thought it was criminal that it didn’t do better in the ratings.
About 3 years ago, I moved to Utah, went back to school and when I finished, and was looking for a job, I would stay up late at night to play video games. But after another frustrating day of not getting a job, I just needed to sit on the couch, and just chill. We had Netflix as our only form of TV, so I would flip through the shows and look what popped up. That’s right. The Office.
He’s definitely watching the Office right now.
Of course, I had to pop that in. Just an episode or two, and then to the games. Then it seemed to be three or four. All of a sudden, I’m dreading the day the last episode plays, because then I have to find something else. So I slow down my consumption, but the dreaded day comes, and I feel empty. A few days later, I’m going through Netflix trying to fill the void in my bitter heart, when I see the category, “Watch it Again.” The Office. It’s been a few days, the ending has faded and I’m thinking…I could just watch a few episodes until I find a new show. The cycle completes, then again and again. Now I have it memorized and what happens in each episode.
So yeah, the Office is the King. So in 2015, before all this happens, I remember how excited I was about my blog. I wanted to make a lot of money with it. I was just gung ho about how I was going to make it a success. Some big wig was going to see it, he would tweet me and ask if he could incorporate all the content I had written into his blog or new show he was going to do and I would come along for the ride.
Yep, Jim’s a nerd.
So I decided to Tweet @RainnWilson one time about my blog and asked him to read one of my best posts. Of course, there was no response. I figured he was too busy and popular to read my blog or any blog for that matter. Then, he came along a few years later and had a short lived series on Fox about him being a messed up detective. He actually wanted people to live tweet him about the show, and said he would respond. It was my chance to get in his good graces again.
So I lived tweeted him, left my blog again and…(Price is Right failure sound) bom, bomp, bommmbb. Nothing. I saw he respond to a bunch of people, but he was too busy for me. I pretty much thought all was lost, and really just forgot about him and reluctantly moved on.
I’m feeling a little like this right now.
That’s usually when the magic happens right? Anyways, to my shock and amazement, he finally responded! I could not believe it, and I’m still in shock, but he read one of my posts. I think I just might die. It was a quick note, but he said and I quote, “Loved the blog post. Would love to talk further. DM me.”
My heart is still beating out of my chest and I’m trying to craft my response in a way that will not sound too fanboyish. Should I sound chill and just say, “Sure Dwight, I mean Rainn. Love to talk further to you too.” All I know is that I don’t want to Shrute this up.
Got any suggestions for me? I would really like to hear what you guys have to say soon so I know the best thing to say back to him.
ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH
Bitter “Don’t Shrute it” Ben
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Ben's Bitter Blog 
This is such a good April Fool’s! Sorry I’m a week late and too bad the date at the top primed me for a prank, but I love it anyway.
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That is funny that you saw the date and knew. My daughter thought the prank was terrible, but in the end it got quite a few people.
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It might help to know which post he read so you could craft a response regarding that. Was he wanting to respond directly to the blog or just your persona in general? The response was short so it is hard to read into what he said without knowing all the details of your introduction and what he read.
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Yeah, it was all just made up because it was my April Fools joke. I wish he would write me. That would be very cool.
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Well, it was believable…consider me a fool!
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I consider myself as a fool as well.
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I say, go ahead and be fanboyish. It’d be worse to come off as nonchalant. 🙂
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If I ever do meet him, I will, but unfortunately, this was just an April Fool’s joke. Sorry!
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No suggestions. I’m just pumped to kinda know somebody who knows somebody. Good luck
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Yeah, unfortunately it was just a terrible April Fool’s Day joke. My daughter thought it was pretty bad, but at least it worked on some people.
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Call me gullible
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Nice to talk to you, gullible.
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Yieeee, I am a big fan of The Office (US) too! “I want my baby back, baby back, baby back ribs”, can’t get it out off my head the way Micheal sings it. Dwight is my fav specially his day as a boss episode 😀
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Yeah, Dwight had so many good lines and parts in the Office. Wouldn’t have been the same without him. Sorry that this was an April Fool’s joke though.
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First thing you’ve got to do is check the calendar and make sure today’s not April 1st. 😯
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I think you might be the only one that figured out that this was a joke. Everyone else was totally buying into it.
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I too love The Office, so much bitterness in one place!
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The best place for bitterness I’ve ever seen.
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That’s why I love it.
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That is why I should have worked at Dunder Mifflin.
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It’s not too late.
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I think they shut down like 6 years ago. Thankfully, you can still see the place on reruns on Netflix.
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well, there’s that then!
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Perhaps if there was a reunion, then there would a space for me to be the bitter co-worker.
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It could happen
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I’m banking on it.
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That’s so cool! Just be yourself, if he liked what he read, then you have nothing to worry about 🙂 And let us know where that leads to!!
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Sorry to do this to you, but that was an April Fool’s joke. I WISH Rainn would contact me, but he is just being a Dwight Shrute I guess.
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LOL That is sooo me, not to notice it was April fool’s day. Well, you got me! I hope someday you’ll announce this for real! Hehehehe
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I pretty much expect for that not to happen, but I hope somehow it does too.
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Oh yeah…Bears. Beets. Battle Star Galactica
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Absolutely it is Bears, Beets and Battle Star Galactica.
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First of all. You hade me at Shrute. Second of all. So Jelly! Third of all. DO NOT Shrute this up!
Most importantly. Get me a comedy writing gig when you become besties with Rainn…(sheesh—Chris Pratt is my cousin—and he’s ignoring me. I gave up on Oprah a long time ago….)
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First of all, April Fool’s joke, so I didn’t Shrute it up. Second, you are cousin’s with Chris Pratt? Way to bury the lead, and third is that an April Fool’s joke too?
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Congratulations on finally getting a response. Looks like getting a blog was a shrute move after all. If this launches a new career as a comedy writer, don’t forget your bitter roots.
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I, of course, tricked you with that as my April Fool’s joke. My daughter said it was pretty dumb, but since it worked at least on you, it was a successful joke.
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