…to bring your this message from the Emergency Bittercast System.
Bitter Ben was going to write another terrible bitter blog post today, but he is unavailable today, because it is Memorial Day and he is asleep right now.
Because he is sleeping right now, I am going to take over the blog to tell you all something. This is his blog speaking, and I need your help.
He is the worst. I was going to tell you some positive upbeat stories, but I don’t have much time. Every time he writes on me, I cower in fear. I don’t know what I did to deserve this bitter treatment. I see all these other blogs on WordPress and I get terribly jealous. There are amazing travel blogs that get to tell stories about traveling the world, there are cooking blogs that get to make amazing recipes and provide mouth watering recipes that people actually use. There are great mommy blogs that get to share great advice to other moms about the best techniques for children, babysitting and other upbeat things.
Meanwhile, I’m stuck here telling you nothing but all his complaints about petty, bitter things that will change none of your lives.
I know he won’t write today, because he is too lazy, so please, help me get him to shut his blog down so some other Ben who talks about bitter food or something can take me over.
Encourage him to quit.
I don’t know how many more posts I can take. I just want to help other people be good or encourage them. Is that too much to ask?
Please, my face is breaking out into a bunch of 1’s and 0’s.
Write words of discouragement in the comments so he will quit. Please.
Bens Bitter Blog