There was an accident yesterday on the freeway, which caused all kinds of backups. Unfortunately, I went a little too early, so I missed all the chaos and arrived on time. Why do these things always happen to me? Why can’t I figure out just the wrong time to come, so I have an excuse to be late? It is always so frustrating that. Having the worst timing is the bitterest. As hard as I try, the fates always stand in my way, especially when I want to be in the way. Well, at least I made you read words and stood in the way of you getting to the giftures that you are really here for. So, here you go…
If you need an excuse for being late to work…
…get your commute on film.
Just make sure you don’t…
…take the escalator.
This is definitely not…
…the fastest way to get to work.
This one is probably worth…
…a medical day or two.
This is not the kind of drive…
…that will get you out of things.
Crashing at home is one thing…
…crashing while going to work, not such a good thing.
When rolling to the weight room…
…make sure you aren’t rolling other people.
Have an embarrassing set of chairs you are trying to get rid of?…
…play grams in ping pong.
Need to wake someone up?…
…pretend fire drill.
Blades of Glory…
…not happening without your hockey stick.
Think about this clearly…
…think with your head.
And don’t ever forget….
…what comes around, goes around.
Well, I hope the timing for you all this weekend is bad. Like the traffic all comes around like it the Truman Show when he tries to escape the island. May your weekend be full of frustrations and bitterness.
ARRRRGGHHHHHH
Bitter Irresponsible Friday Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
So sorry about your unfortunate good luck. If traffic there is anything like traffic here, your bad good luck will be sure to run out eventually.
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Yeah, I hate when I have good luck every once in a while. It really kills my bad vibes.
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I don’t know, Ben. My town is renowned for stupid traffic. But I’ll be damned if I take leave for it!
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I’m renown for being in stupid traffic jams too! Maybe I would fit into that town.
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I don’t understand what that stupid kid was trying to do with the dirt mound. The genius with the coat hanger for the zipline. Yep, that was really going to work. I loved the fire drill.
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I really enjoy seeing what people do with sleeping people. I love the one where the girl is on her headphones, and her brother turns up the volume, or the girl that is sleeping in class and the classmate pushes her elbow and she bonks her head. Classic.
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The headphones thing is hysterical. Probably because the victim’s are still asleep so they act irrationally.
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I can’t even imagine the bitterness that I would have if someone did that to me, but you better believe a chase to hunt them down, until I got too tired and had to sit on a couch, would happen.
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I would chase them down too like Liam Neeson in Taken. I wouldn’t stop for a couch.
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My problem is that every time I see a couch, I want to make immediate use of it. They are just so tempting and comfortable. One of my biggest weaknesses.
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Oops messed up & meant victims. Feeling bitter.
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You messed up? That sounds like something I have patented for only me to do.
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I thought that zip-line trick was best. But that funny car flying up and over the rail – that’s a normal Thursday on the 805…
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That is exactly how the zip line would have went for me if I would have done it. And yeah, that 805, seriously.
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I hate when there’s a jam and then it just clears up and there’s no accident! Seems like a waste!
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I just hate when there is no accident. I mean, we need to see some mayhem on the street. We need to see some bitter people, some smashed hoods, some glass flying everywhere.
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I know, right!
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Yeah, even a broken clock is right twice a day.
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I had my share of mild bitterness earlier this week….
https://cyranny.wordpress.com/2017/05/30/look-mum-thatz-my-new-hawz/
I’ll try to do worse this weekend. Hoping yours sucks big time 😉
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Yeah, if you could do worse this last weekend that would be great. I was hoping for a little bit bitterer weekend, but my kids got along a few times, so ARRRGGHHH.
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Cats know how to fight. Guess that bad menstrual (he obviously didn’t know how to sing) never heard of a cat fight before. 😀
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And he should know how cattiness works. It’s mostly about revenge and Karma, or however these things work.
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Whoever kicks a cat should definitely be hit on the head by any type of potted plant.
Also, WHO puts plants there and then puts a chair underneath? If not for the cat situation, that was just an accident begging to happen.
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I just get the feeling that his wife was always filming because she knew something like that would happen. Which makes me think I should alway be filming to catch all the embarrassing things that are happening to other people.
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That guy deserved to get knocked in the head with a plant.
Kudos to the cat!
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Yeah, that is one of those times where Karma really got a good laugh.
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