Because lots of humans are visual creatures, it is pretty easy to trick them. For instance, I could wear a recently dry cleaned suit, a freshly ironed white shirt, perfectly creased pants, shiny polished shoes and really nice haircut and most people (IE you) would not be able to tell the difference between me and a slick high paid New York City lawyer from Suits.
Thanks to our eyes being probably the coolest (and probably the most overrated) feature we have, a lot of us base things on beauty. We love to look at Instagram because it shows us beautiful pictures and and our eyes think that the people that post them have amazing lives. Our brains are smarter than that, but a lot of times our eyes overrule our brains, because our brains are the nerds and our eyes are the popular kids in school that people worship, even though we know they are probably terrible people.
The same thing we do every night.
Thankfully, I am bitter and I love to take advantage of people, much like the Brain of Pinky and the Brain fame. Even though I’m just one human, I have this super ability to be on social media and use it for my bitter ambitions.
Whenever you guys give me the ability to use something to my advantage, I’m going to take it.
So bully your nerdy brain and push it into the locker and let your popular boy or girl eyes look at my beautiful looking infographic that you are going to like, subscribe, comment and share, because it is the GOPro 4K TV of graphics and you don’t care about stupid words. You just care about the graphics.
Just make sure that at the end of reading the pretty infographic that you get hypnotized and do everything it tells you to. Because you are mesmerized by it.
ARRRRGGHHHHH
Bitter Fancy Polish Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
Only 5 commandments to learn … way easier than 10! You could start a cult …
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I honestly couldn’t even remember the 5 commandments, so some cult leader I would be. I would make all the citizens of my cult remember them all.
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This is great!! I love it! What program did you use to make it? I was working on making some, too. But then, you know, the muffins and dishes got in the way. š But, would love to get back to trying more when I can find the time.
I really love the layout of this one! And, as always, LOVE the ironic humor of all your stuff!
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I used Canva. Have you ever used that program? Super easy to do and they have all kinds of templates that you just plug in the words and save. It is fun for someone like me who knows almost nothing about graphic design.
Thanks, you’ve always been super supportive of my bitter and ironic humor. Can’t wait to see what you come up with!
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Ha! You forgot to include something brilliant and mesmerizing, so I remain unhypnotized. š As usual, you said a bunch of stuff that is the exact opposite of what I was thinking. Your bitterness will never overtake me. *Pours sugar on Ben’s bitterness.*
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You are the bitter antidote. Your sunshiny attitude and chipper disposition are sunning on my bitter parade. Thanks so much (and I mean that sarcastically).
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Canva is pretty cool,although I’ve only begun to tool around on it and haven’t made anything nearly as cool as your graphic! Of course, I’d have to replace what you’ve said with the opposite! š¤£ššš
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Well, I think Canva makes it really hard for people to do amazing graphics that are positive. It was so easy for me, because it was a bitter one. emoji, emoji, emoji.
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Hahahahaha! I see!!!! Lol!
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I’m sure there are other programs that make it easier for positive and non bitter infographics. I will spend all my busy time at work trying to help you figure it out, cause I’m super helpful like that.
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Well now, that doesn’t sound very bitter! Lol!!! Helpful people ROCK! “Happy face with hearts emoji” LOLOLOL!!!!
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It wasn’t helpful at all because I was being sarcastic. And all those emoji I spelled out were bitter emoji, I was just too lazy to spell all that out.
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Ya, that was my attempt at sarcasm as well. Lol!
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Dang it, I got out sarcasticed! I hate when that happens!
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Hahahaha! Well I’ve learned a new word! š
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I just did too. I make them up as I go.
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Like Dr. Suess! Love Dr. Suess and his crazy words!
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Yeah, except he is a beloved children’s author and I’m a bebittered blogger.
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There once was a man named Ben. He knew how to write without pen. He typed and he typed, till he shut out the lights, and a bebittered blogger he became known as to men…. LOLOLOLOL
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Definitely a bebittered man. I used to write with a pen, but they became so distracting, I had to use a keyboard instead.
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Pingback: #Bitter #Fancy #Polish | Moroccan Sahara 2016
Looks like you’re well on your way to earning your doctorate in Bitterness. š
Pinky and the Brain. One of my favorites.
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I sure hope to someday be called Dr. Bitter Ben, but of course, I will probably come up one question short on the final exam and be forever in limbo because I just gave up.
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I can’t be bitter with a Pinky and the brain reference. I love Pinky and the brain.
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Mr. Brain is definitely bitter, mostly because he is so stinking smart, but he can’t seem to take over the world. Also probably pretty bitter because he is a mouse and small and in a lab. Pinky…well he is just blissfully unaware, so it would be pretty easy for him.
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Rules of thumb I already live by. Badass infographic.
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Yeah, I just learned how to do them and they only caused a minor bit of bitterness. So I will probably sprinkle them in a lot of my posts going forward.
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Better believe I pinned that amazing infographic!
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Cool. I assume that it is on Pinterest somewhere. I guess I need to follow you on there now.
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Lol it’s on my personal more trafficked pinterest not the Shopgirl one. No one loves Shopgirl’s pinterest other than the crickets
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Let me know the link to it and I will follow or whatever.
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