There is a social media app out there that I think many of you are missing out on.  On the surface you might think that Venmo is just another way to pay people without actually paying them, you would be wrong. In fact, if you are on Instagram mostly just to look at other people’s pictures, which I mostly am, this app takes it to a whole other level. If you think looking at other people’s pictures is slick, just wait until you see what other people are paying for. For some strange reason (probably my entertainment), when you pay someone on Venmo you can use emojis to express what you paid people for.

But the most bizarre feature on Venmo is that most people’s payments are public. Basically anyone you have every paid, or got paid for on Venmo can choose to make their payment to another either private or public. I usually choose private, but most people either don’t care, or don’t remember to make it private. This leaves you with a timeline like on Facebook or Instagram, but more entertaining, because people usually use really funny emoji’s that they think are an inside joke, but really they are public to people like me who are just reading the timeline to figure out what you are doing with your cash.

Not only does it allow me to sneakily find out what you are doing, but also all your inside jokes. And that you have way too much money and should be Venmoing money to me. Enough about the latest social media app. Let’s talk Bitter Friday Giftures.

Let’s all pretend…

Let’s all pretend…

Let’s all pretend…

Let’s make believe…

Let’s live in a Utopian world…

Let’s think we have meaning…

Let’s think of a magical world…

Let’s pretend…

Let’s pretend we live in a world…

Let’s pretend that we live in world…

Let’s pretend we live in a world…

Let’s live in a world where this girl is famous… 

I know you all believe that talent, and enlightenment, making the world a better place and spending time with others is real purpose of life, but let’s be honest with ourselves. You know those reasons I listed why Venmo was the best social media app at the beginning of this post? It was all lies. The reason why Venmo is the best social media out there is because cash.

ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH

Bitter Venmo Loving Ben