Who knew that this guy would ever have a job again? Who knew that not only would he be working in an industry he used to think was the biggest scam? That’s right, I work in insurance now. Don’t worry though, I don’t actually do anything with your accounts; that would be scary. No, I just social media it. The funny part about all that is we are required to get our insurance license, so technically I could be the one who does your insurance at least in this state. Anyways, I never thought I would join the bitter industry. Let’s just say like most actors, it’s fun to play the bitter guy in movies. With further ado, here are this week’s Bitter Saturday Giftures.
Vegans that eat french fries…

…are joining the dark side.
All the sun this summer…

…is making my skin join the dark side.
Career-long OKC player…

…joins the bitter side by joining Houston.
Dog tries to join the dark side…

…fails.
This is me whenever someone tries to talk to me…

…about things.
There’s always that one friend…

…who won’t let it go.
Actually…

…you should all take it personally.
Sometimes I wish…

…I wish I was camouflaged like this guy.
That’s why it always feels…

…why this guy is so udderly ridiculous.
Man geese are the worst…

…because they remind me so much of myself.
Don’t let the…

…fake smile fool you.
This is how it feels to be…

…in a conversation.
Now that I’ve joined the bitter side of the industry, I’m sure you will all not want to talk to me. Why didn’t I think of this earlier?
ARRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH
Bitter Insuring your Nightmares Ben
If I talk to you, will I get lower rates?
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If you email me, I can get you in touch with a Somalian prince that will send you $7 million dollars when you give him your bank account number.
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