If anyone has seen the epic, Saving Mr. Banks, you’ve seen one of the bitterest characters in cinema history. No, I’m not talking about Walter Disney. The point of the movie wasn’t about how P.L. Travers wrote this book about a nanny called Mary Poppins, but how she humiliated the Walt guy by telling him that he couldn’t use the color red in his movie. Because she could. This lady stood up to the King of Nice, Happy and Overly Sappy, Mr. Disney himself. For that alone, this person gains my bitter respect. She went to Disneyland and told him how ridiculous Disneyland was(of course I’ve said that too, but she got to tell him to his face). Take that Walter!
This week there were bitter posts about other things. Many people face pressures of work, kids and fulfilling resolutions. I talked about the pressures of fitting out, not of clothes, for which I surely have had, but of people just leaving me alone. I worked hard on maintaining an invisible profile, but failed minimally.
There was shortened version of a class offered at the B.I.T.T.E.R. School for Bitterness for beginners of the bitterness profession called Bitterness for Dummies. It gave a few of the principles before signing up for the paid class.
Then of course, a 2014 Retrospective and Friday Giftures were offered as a look back at the year 2014, which in my Bitter opinion was the worst year on record.
Things were Bitter tweeted:
There were comments:
On Pressures of Fitting Out:
“No way! I was voted ”the most epic social awkwardness you have ever seen” too! It took years to perfect the awkward smile, but I think I finally got it right.” Miss Four Eyes
On Bitter For Dummies:
“Practicing my jedi bitter scowl and igno-ray! Let the bitterness flow through me!” Cupitonians
On 2014 Retrospective and Friday Gifitures:
“I don’t like to look back, and I don’t believe in looking forward. Looking back is depressing, looking forward lends itself to disappointment. Either way, very bitter not to just live in the moment.” SJ Powers
There were also some Bonus Bitter Gifitures:
When my boss comes walking by:
They should have stored joy in a better safe:
I would pay a thousand Shrute Bucks to do this to the whole world.
Alright, I’m going to go ahead and end this thing because the Golden Globes are on and they need to be mocked right now. The speeches are horrible, the people are even worse and no one is going to read this thing because they are also busy doing that too. Bitter weekend to you bitterites!
Bitter Banky Ben