Blog Ideas

Note to self: Just a draft. Do not publish.

Blog post ideas:

March 26 Oscars are so boring. Do I even write about them anymore. What could I talk about that would make them more interesting. I guess I could make some absurd predictions about what will happens. Will…that reminds of wIll smith…something so absured ti would never happen. Maybe something about how Will Smith slapps someone. The Rock? No too big. Chris Rock isnt too big though. Well, I’ll think of something.

March 14 – Gas prices. Those are a riot. luckily I have an electric car. They don’t they affect me. well, other than high prices of everythign else, they dont. what woudl be funny bout them? I was using petrolium jelly last night for my feet . OMG, how about writing about the rising prices of petroliem jelly. hehe

March 5 -Ghosts – Ghost rider, Nic Cage, how he’s such a bad actor and only has two expressions, crazy and insane, Ghost WRiter. make that connection between ghost rider and ghost writer.

Feb. 24th – I went to the pharmacist today to get a prescription. They asked me how if I knew how to take the drugs I had taken for 2 year. I was like, is it by mouth with a glass of water? Or ami supposed to grind it into paste and snort it. Makes me think I could be a pharm-assist.

Feb. 18 – I was talking to someone the other day about how awful and absured our world is right now. he said, we kind of need a reset . And both of us at the same time said, “We just need Thanos to come and snap us for 5 years. That would make such a funny post.

Feb. 10th – I heard a joke on Tik tok. You know how we ge t milk from cows? how do we get almond milk. Do we milk almonds?

Feb. 9th – I was at a high school concert last night cause my daughter wante to go. My ears commented to me that they wanted to be deaf. I commented to mey daughter that no one “hear” (get it, hear?) would be in danger of getting recruited for a college scholarship in singing. She didn’t think that was funny.

Feb. 6th – I was watching TV and one of the actors said they were on Cloud 9. I started to wonder if anyone was ever on cloud 10. What is Cloud 10 like? Are most people on cloud 5 or cloud 2? Why are people only on cloud 9? What is so special about cloud 9? Is it the only one that you don’t fall through?

December 30 – Dust bunnies is kind of a weird word. Why not dust lions or dust Energizer bunnies. Dust Elves on a shelf? Since they are on the shelf already just like dust. HAHAHA

Feb. 24th Annoying co-workers. Talk about how the new girl ally is a raging energy drinkaholic.

December 2019 – Make up some disease that will start an epidemic. Absurd name. Like name it after kind of beer. Bud light virus? HA. hmm. maybe. how about schlitz, yeah, so funny. I’ll keep thinkign about it. Snoop dog is doing a corona commercial. He is so chill. Well, maybe I’ll come up with one

Gifture ideas here

eat it Phyllis?

Caption? should I call this one a lawn bro-er?

Best caption…in your face or feeling melon-choly?

best caption: cat-tastrophie or sodumb?
Caption…French Dip Slider…or escalating stupidity?
Chair-ity case?

The human rolly polly bugs?

Snakeskin boots…or on the beltway?

kids are the worst…

somthing about bears?
no toilet humor, too obvious.
just use this one because it’s funny

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