When I was 22, I had the energy to work a full day, come home, play a sport, and then after that go out and enjoy some time with friends and then come home and stay up until 4 am. I never did any of those things, but I had the energy to do those things if I wanted to.

Now that I am 48, I barely have the energy to work a full day without falling asleep halfway through the day. There has to be some really compelling reason for me to do anything after work. Like my son being in a football game or my daughter being in a play. Or zombies are invading my house.   Actually, if zombies invaded my house, I would stay right on my couch. They wouldn’t find me to be a very valuable recruit because I wouldn’t try very hard to get anyone else to be a zombie. And let’s be honest, after work I already kind of look like a zombie anyways.

I think zombies would have a really hard time recruiting anyone these days, because even young, healthy kids are streamers on Youtube or Twitch.

Speaking of streamers, how in the world did these people become a thing? People actually sit and watch other people play games, talk or watch tv.  Why couldn’t this kind of thing have been invented when I was a kid? If you put a camera in front of me while my brother and I played the Legend of Zelda on the NES, we could have made a ton of money. Mostly because people would have laughed at my bad my hair, bad teeth and really poor fashion choices. (Short shorts anyone?)

There have been some things that have captured the attention and imagination of people throughout the history of the world, such as the tires, lightbulb, mankinds first trip to the moon, and the internet.

But all those things pale in comparison to streamers.

We should have seen it coming though. In 1998, the Truman Show and we kind of scoffed. Why would people just sit and watch one person all day every day as entertainment? We thought that maybe it was only interesting because Jim Carrey is always interesting to watch. What they were wrong about was that we would watch a bunch of other people.  When Twitch came out, it was mostly just watching people play video games, but now it has popular channels of people just talking. 

I guess people are interested in just watching other people do nothing.

People used to watch Seinfeld so they could watch a show about nothing. Now, they just tune in on Twitch. 

If this really is where the future goes, I am going to throw my hat in the ring. Just wait until you see how interesting it is to watch a guy type in spreadsheets and websites by day and sit on a couch for 6 hours at night. It’s going to be boffo ratings, you will see.

Speaking of nothing, here are some nothing Bitter Friday Giftures…

If you think no one is interested in watching…

And maybe people…

Don’t worry if you don’t have anything scheduled…

Some people plan way too much…

But others like me…

You may think of zombies…

Or even…

But my kind of zombie…

If you were to watch me stream…

Some people would probably look at me…

But after watching guys like this…

For some reason, after looking at all the statistics of people that follow my stream, it appears that 90% of them are insomniacs. And almost all of them are being cured of their insomnia. In fact, most of the readers of my blog are aIso insomniacs and are also being cured of insomnia. I guess I am doing some good in the world, but it’s purely on accident. 

ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH

Bitter Streamer Ben