National Don’t Hug A Person Bitterness

That be me.

I like to go on Twitter to get all my news, because it normally comes with a bit of sass, sarcasm and of course bitterness. We really only got news from Facebook and Twitter. After our forced news outage we went through of over a year and a half, we finally have cable back so we can find out stuff from the traditional method of TV and television news, but I still haven’t watched it.  If it isn’t trendy enough for Twitter or Facebook, then it probably isn’t worth my time to know about.

Anyways, I noticed on Twitter trending this morning that today is #NationalHUGanewpersonday. I don’t know if you guys know this about me, but I’m not a hugger. I’m guessing you deduced that about me.

I will be taking the day to interupt all I do whenever I see someone and go to them and not hug them. I will acknowledge people feelings by putting my headphones and listening to music as loud as I can. I will walk down hallways and see someone and immediately look away, or pretend I see something on the wall that is way more interesting.

Anytime I see someone in the hallway.

I know people think that hugs improve circulation and increase happiness, and that is something that I have worked so hard to avoid. Besides take a hug just a little too far and it can either be taken as sexual harrasement or trying to crush someone. Who needs that kind of thing on their concience? There are so many other things you can do to show you don’t like someone that don’t require wrapping your arms around someone.

Eye rolls, passive aggressiveness, shrugs and side eyes, and even flat out ignoring someone.

One of the worst things about hugs is when you totally aren’t into them and someone else is, so you have that awkward moment when you go in for the handshake, they go in for the hug and it becomes that awkward hand hug. Uggh.

Yeah, this.

The worst thing about hugging someone is a huge bitter peeve of mine. If you are 6’1 like me and you end up have to hug someone slightly shorter than you, their hair is right there near your face. You know what sickens me almost as much as hugs? Hair. Near my face. I have already shown my distaste for hair by shedding most of it from my head. Then to have the chance of that hair getting all over my face, mouth or getting stuck in my stubble just freaks me the heck out.

So do yourself a favor. Don’t hug someone today. Your life will be bitter for it.

Who else is with me? Who just can’t stand getting hugged, especially by someone you barely know?

ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH

 

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20 thoughts on “National Don’t Hug A Person Bitterness

  1. I am that short person you don’t want to hug and let me tell you it’s no picnic hugging a big tall guy either. You get a face full of chest and Lord knows you guys are always spilling food on yourselves, so there’s no telling what you might encounter.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You may think you’re getting all your news on Twitter, but you’re really getting some of it from Fox News., because The Donald makes a lot of news on Twitter, and guess who gets his news from Fox? Therefore, Twitter is merely the “middle man” between you and the source. Sorry to be the bearer of such BITTER news!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. my church is big on the “man hug”. It’s sort of a trademark. Really, really funny to see someone come for first time. Palm sweat, fear in the eyes, handshake extended. holding their breath…. squeeze! Maybe a christian shouldn’t tease – but those are some darn funny moments!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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