I am constantly losing things. I’ve lost my wallet multiple times, usually when I needed it the most. Once I lost my wallet when I was at an amusement park in Cincinnati and had to have all the money so I could buy sweet souviners. I was steaming mad, but as always, it was inside since I very rarely express outward feelings. The second time was right at the end of my school year in college in which I was going to move to another state and start another college. As you know, you can barely do anything in college without a college ID, like even take a test, so it kind of made it difficult to take my finals. Of course, I finally found it on one of the last days I was there, in the couch of my girlfriends house. It was great.
I lose my mind on occasion too, but that is pretty common for bitter people such as myself. Losing something is usually pretty inconvenient most of the time, because it causes stress, anger, resentment and bitterness. However, this last weekend, I lost my voice. I don’t get sick a whole lot, which kind of sucks, because getting sick is pretty awesome. You are expected to be lazy and lay on the couch or bed all day. You are excused from chores, supposed to take long showers and make people do things for you.
The best part of this sickness, was that I lost my voice. Most of the time, as a human, people expect you to say things all day. They ask you questions, you answer them. You might need to ask them things, they respond back. When you lose your voice though, people get sick and tired of you answering really softly or just pointing at your throat. So it is kind of the best. It either makes people go away or get really frustrated. Either one, is what I wish people would do way more often.
I may or may have my voice back by now, but there is nothing that says that I can’t continue to use the sharade. You know, the one where I continue to use the excuse that I can’t talk and need to wear a sign that says I can’t talk, so don’t speak to me. If you should see this sign on me, please just assume that it is real. Because if you don’t, I might shout at you that I can’t talk. And no one wants that.
You definitely don’t want someone that can’t talk to yell at you.
ARRRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH(said in a low gravely voice)
Bitter Larry N Gitis Ben