
If only road trips were this successful.
Last year when we decided to move here to Utah, it was mostly because I was going back to school to learn Social Media Marketing. The bitter irony to that is that I am not social at all. As you read from my post a few days ago, I am way more into my screens than people.
The great thing I learned about social media marketing is that being social really meant people on your screen, so maybe it is perfectly suited for me. I don’t have to be social with people, I just have to type, and post and download social with people. That I can do. With my screens.
One of the other reasons we came here, was that we had family here. In Seattle, we were on the far corner of the US map and while people in my family did tend to come see us Olympic style (every four years) it was usually just as a stopover (1 day, 12 hours, 3 or four hours) to get to beautiful Vancouver or go to get weird in Portland. So, if we wanted to see our siblings we had to come here. Plus my parents were here as well as my wife’s sister. Problem being, we would come here for a week. And we would spend it, driving hither and thither, going between parents, and siblings all week long. We could nary spend a moment actually vacationing, because we were too busy familying.
We would come back from vacation feeling exhausted, like we didn’t really get to do anything fun, just “hang with family”. And sometimes we came at a time when families were busy, or on their own vacation, so even that time with them was quite short.
Once we moved here, we thought it would be awesome, because we would see them all the time. Wrong. They are still busy doing things, and going on vacations all around the world, and their kids take up their time, being in school and all. And for some reason, our kids are in school too, and they do things that take up our time as well (seriously kids, could you be more selfish?).
But this week, my family is back in Washington, and they left me here to look for a job again (boring story, don’t want to talk about it. Just kidding, I’m sure there will be some future bitter post about it.) The first day of them being gone was awesome, (yeah total bachelor freedom!), then I realized it gets pretty lonely around here without some kid bugging me to do something for them.
So I decided to call my siblings and invite myself over for dinner. Not only because I can’t cook, but because they know I like pizza and will probably get it for me “as a treat”. And you know what? It has been quite enlightening.

Family fights were the best weren’t they?
These are people I used to fight with all the time. For the pettiest of things. She sat too near my side of the seat. He kept using my toy without asking. He wore my shoes. He rubbed his sock in my face. She beat me over the head with a mace.
Nowadays, they won’t even be petty like me anymore. They decided they are all grown up and mature and just want to talk about memories and stuff. They want to be nice and civil and share funny stories. Seriously, siblings. Grow a little less mature would you?
Who has time for siblings that don’t want to fight? That don’t want to jump from the second floor railings or flip cars over with girlfriends, or try to rub boogers in each other’s faces or flip food at each other?
They just have meaningful jobs and lives and kids. What the heck? Their maturity is so immature.
Now I’m starting to wonder why I moved here again. UGGGHHHH.
ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH
Bitter Sibling Bittery Ben
Lol! When did everyone get all grown up anyways!?! Sorry for any past-due comments, I’m playing catch up on all the bitterness! And my advice is, sometimes if you want PETTY you better get up and get petty! Then, it’s all a domino effect from there! It’s the law of the things. You have to set the pettiness in motion. Ha!!!
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It was fun to grow up with all my sibling rivalries. I especially appreciated making them all bitter.
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Mace beatings? Sign me up! 😜
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I know. I wish to see that kind of thing more in the future.
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You can’t win.
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Nope I sure can’t. Thus why I am so bitter all the time.
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I thought you didn’t like having fun anyway.
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Fun is for the birds. And the bees. You know because they like to sting.
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Fo sho!
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Vancouver, Washington is beautiful.
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So I’ve been told. I’ve also heard Vancouver Canada too, but they have fires there now that are being sent down Seattle’s way.
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You have to adapt, Bitter Ben. If you want to get some fun mischief going, it has to be adult fun mischief. For instance, you can go hang out with a sibling and get them all sentimental by sharing past memories. Then in the middle of that, hit them up for a $10,000 loan. I guarantee their reaction will be priceless.
Or you can ask to move in with them for a few months. Or just ask to borrow their car, after telling them yours was impounded when you were pulled over for drunk driving. You know, adult fun stuff like that.
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Yeah, I guess I would have to act like an adult if I wanted them to get into mischief. Like you said, you have to play their petty games.
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I hate them.
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Yep, they are the worst. Siblings. Seriously.
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What? Mature adult siblings don’t want to fight or be mean or petty? Siblings can have meaningful jobs and lives and be happy to get together and hang out? I think that my siblings never got the memo.
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I know I wish I could get them riled up or at least get them to be a little petty about something. But no, purely pleasant to be around.
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