I was laying in my Lazy Ben recliner the other day, watching some TV and some commercials came on. As an aside, I’m pretty bad at most things, but I’m pretty good at recognizing patterns. If there were ever a job that required me to point out pointless and dumb similarities that two people had, I would be at least the Vice President of Recognition. I’m always pointing out how this person in a movie was in this one other movie to my wife, or seeing someone in totally random place at the mall and pointing out that they look totally like that one celebrity. I guess it has always been a gift to have this totally useless talent.
I know most of you skip commercials on your DVR’s, but I’ve always liked watching commercials, probably because I wanted to be a copywriter until I figured out that no one wanted to hire me. So, as an extension of my pattern recognizing talent, I have the ability to recognize ad campaigns that are similar to each other. Like for instance, there are two different campaigns, one for America’s Best Glasses, commercials and one for local college WGU, that feature wise talking owls that dispense wise advice, and both of these wise owls recommend things to humans, and the humans try to make owl puns, which are funny to them, but not to the owls.
While talking owls are absurd, it is allowable for them to be in those commercials because they are a symbol of wisdom. But another set of recent campaigns that is kind of disturbing to me is the cannibalistic cereals. Ever seen these? Both Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a cereal called Krave, are essentially cannibalistic cereals. Essentially among these two cereals it is survival of the fittest. Or even more cruelly, survival of the best prankster.
These strange animated cereal’s play practical jokes on each other just so they can eat each other. If these kind of shenanigans happen in our culture, we are horrified. But since these things are animated, and adorable creatures that look tasty to us, we are completely fine with it?
I know a lot of the headlines are grabbed by a woman who is leaking private emails and a guy with bad hair talking about building walls, but can we perhaps look at the real issues here? Why are we allowing cereals to eat each other? How is something going on right in front of our faces and we are doing nothing about it? Wake up people. Fix this issue. So I can go back to my Lazy Ben recliner and watch some good commercials.
Bitter Non Canabalistic Ben