You know what makes me so bitter? I set up a recording on my DVR for a program and then watch it, because you know that is why I recorded it. So I watch the program until the end and it cuts off like 3 seconds before the program ends. This makes me so bitter. Does the DVR company not know that the crucial last three seconds were going to make or break my day. It is like they want me to not know the ending so I will not be able to learn how to read or write or learn things that will help me to write to their company to complain. They know that if it is only three seconds then people can’t complain because what did they really miss?
I’ll tell you what I missed DVR people. I missed a really crappy show. But I invested 29 minutes and 57 seconds into that terrible show and I want to know what happens at the end. It is not enough that you have to torture me with this bad programming, but now you have to laugh in my face that I wasted all this time that I can never get back. But maybe in those three seconds the show could have turned around. Maybe that three seconds could have shown that the terrible actors were kidding the whole time and were really good. Maybe in those three seconds the writing would really have improved enough to make me really want to again waste my time next week. Maybe even the cinematography would have shown just the right thing at the end to completely and totally redeem the program and I would get that AHA moment, knowing what the heck they were talking about this whole program.
You have ruined society, DVR and your three seconds. If it wasn’t for you, all these fantastic programs like Ben and Kate and Animal Hospital would have survived the cancellations but you had to cut off of the crucial moments in these shows storylines. How could you do this to us DVR? How could you be so heartless and cruel? These people’s terrible shows are on the line and it is all because of your mean three second crushing of these shows spirits that they are now in cancellation purgatory. Maybe if you would have just given them precious three seconds, we would have more garbage television to complain about.
For this, those precious three seconds, that you have deprived us of, I am bitter. The value of three seconds is great. Think about all the bitter things that you could have done in three seconds. Maybe a basketball game was 3 seconds from being over and you missed it because the DVR missed those or you were three seconds away from winning a radio contest. You will never know how much bitterness could come from those three seconds you deprived us from DVR. Stop making me so bitter!