Greetings Bitter People of the Internet Blogosphere. Bitter Ben here from First World Problemia. I have a complaining-about-first-world-problems problem and people at work started noticing so they started calling me Bitter Ben. A long time ago, I learned in marketing that you should find a need and fill it. I started noticing that a lot of people like to complain about little things, but they felt ashamed to do it, because they felt like they were being petty. So I came up with the idea to start a 900 line (1-900-BITR-BEN), where people could call and complain about all the little things that drove them crazy, but the twist was that the Customer Service Rep could also complain back. This would not only allow all the complainers to get it out of their systems, but the call would be longer and I would get more money. This lead me to come up with my tag line, “We make bitter better.” That idea failed because of a number of reasons, so instead I did the next best thing. Start a blog with the same mission. For free. For now. But someday, you will be eating in Bitter Themed Restaurants, reading Bitter themed novels, and wearing bitter oversized T-shirts. Everytime you hear someone say bitter you will think of me or this blog and you will pay a fee just for thinking about it.
So for now, jump into this safe bitter filled environment, where you are free to complain as bitterly as you like. No matter how petty, all bitterness is free to roam these wide open bitter halls, or meadows if you prefer. Comment the heck out of every post, because you can be sure I will comment right back with more bitterness. Let’s “Make Bitter Better”.
Bitter Ben
A picture of the real Bitter Me.
Some Bitter Posts to get you started:
The two posts that miraculously got Freshly Pressed:
Some other Popular Bitter Posts:
And a few of my Bitter Favorites:
Guardians of the Bendrameda Galaxy
The Four Chambers of my Bitter Heart
Surviving Work Disasters Bitterness
From the Bitter Benzoac Era to the Bitter Twitter Era
Don’t forget to follow the Bitterness elsewhere:
Credit to Michelle of Life as I Know It for this cartoon version of me.
Do you have contact info? I ask bc do you ever do guests posts? I can explain this further. Feel free to email me at hotmess@hotmessmemoir.com with the answer.
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I actually do have contact info. I’ll email you.
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when’s the Bitter Ben franchise opening up? Any truth to the rumours you would not allow any in Scotland?
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It will coming to a bitter location near you very soon. It will be a dining experience you will want to soon forget.
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This blog is just what I need right now to fuel my own bitterness. Hats off to you for truly “making bitter better” and not just making an annoying catchphrase that means nothing.
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It’s just what I need to avoid work right now, because I just have no motivation to do it. But making bitter better, that is exciting.
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Ha. What do you do to advance the grinding of the gears that crush us all, if I may be so bold as to ask?
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I work in the grind called administration and customer service. It chews me up and spits me out everyday and feeds my bitterness everyday.
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Ah yes. A tune I know very well. Well, kudos on sustaining the feeding of your bitterness through such an effective medium.
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I will use it to feed the beast until something better comes along and gives me new and different ammo.
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I like the way you think.
Maybe we could be partners in bitter some day. However, I think I’d have a lot of competition. Now back to my own bitter writing. (Which, I must say with a heavy amount of bitterness, is not as good as yours.)
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Yeah get back to work doing your bitter things at work. And I will continue to ignore all the pointless work I’m supposed to be doing.
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Turns out all my bitter phase needed was a pinch of your bitter blog! Now I’m smiling and laughing!
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Welcome to the bitterness. We have all kinds of services for all different kinds of bitter needs.
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Hi Bitter Ben!
I love your blog and am tagging you to write a Letter to Your Future Self. Don’t know if you participate in these things, but if you do, the link is at : http://bubblesandbeebots.com/2016/02/07/letter-to-myself-open-next-year-2017/
🙂
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I read your letter. Very insightful! I appreciate the tag. Can’t promise I will do it, but I will think really hard about it…
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Thanks! I understand if you don’t, but thought I’d throw it out there, in case you were interested
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I love the idea, I think my problem is I have all kinds of posts in the hopper that I want to do first and I would probably never get to it. That’s why I don’t do those awards most of the time either. But again, really enjoyed yours. You really put a lot of thought into it and it was pretty personal. Thanks for sharing!
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I liked the idea too, and thought I’d throw It out there, but it is weird to tag people (like saying, “hey, here’s another project for ya”).
So it’s there if you want to play but I get it if you don’t. 🙂
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I just always like the acknowledgement, but not having to do the work. Like I would love to get an Academy Award, but wouldn’t want to do all the acting in order to get it. 🙂
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Hahahaha!! This is one awesome bitter blog 😂😂
I’m thanking myself for having found you & jumped onto the wagon of this bitter better blog!
Your new reader,
Noorain
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Um, I just read that you are a lawyer and a biotechnologist and a foodie? And you think this whiny blog is worth a second of your time? Now that is a compliment!
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Oh c’mon Ben!! You know, your blog is super amazing. I mean, all I did was smile and have a great time here.
I’m gonna be sticking around for more. Maybe I’ll just turn into a “Bitter” stalker 😂😂
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Most people have a bitter old time here. But every once in a while a really nice person sneaks in and actually likes it with the power of their positivity. You are one of the few!
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Hey there! I cannot seem to find a contact email to send the Feature Friday questions, send me an email at cyndel.bee@gmail.com whenever your can 🙂
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Sorry I just sent my email to you in a comment. But I’ll send to your email. Thanks again!
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Hey Ben, I like your bitterness. Quick question – how long have you been working on your blog? or at least this one? I just started mine. Thanks
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I’ve been on this one almost 4 years in March. So much bitterness!
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HI
Thanking you so much for finding my blog and liking a post. Hope you drop by again soon
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Omg you’re brilliant! :’) YOU make bitter better! (I have an every complaining aunt, but she’s not nearly as funny as you – she only drains energy whereas you make me laugh out loud).
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Well, like I said in my about page, it came about by just complaining about my job, and people just suggested I become that and blog about it. And it has been quite fun to blog about all the little things that bother me.
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Pingback: blogger recognition award. | what sandra thinks
I tend to be like sweet and sour sauce myself, you know the cheap good kind McDonald’s used to have. I am still bitter about these stupid new apple pies their pushing though…Give me fried and bubbly, not wet and soft…..
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And telling us that they are just a buck isn’t helping either. Just give me my sausage McMuffin and take my money.
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Sorry, I’ve been laughing bitterly all over your blog (one of those horrible happy people), but rest assured I’m indeed leaving here thoroughly scathed! Thank-you also for your visit and not being TOO bitter to like a post. Bitters to you! (Is that what you say when everyone else means “cheers”?)
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So you left glitterly happiness all over my blog? I hope you cleaned up afterwards. Cause the bitterness gets really bitter when happy comes along and leaves its happy all over.
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What a fantastic idea! Thanks for the like of my blog and I look forward to reading more bitterness!
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I figured why not display my bitterness instead of hiding it in the closet right?
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Like drinking bitter coffee, I enjoy reading the bitter posts you share. It makes me think of all the bitter things in my own life. I’ve nominated you for the Blogger Recognition Award. Should you choose to accept, my post can be found here:
https://mylittlepieceofquiet.wordpress.com/2015/08/19/blogger-recognition-award/
I hope you have a very bitter day 🙂
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I am definitely having a bitter day as I always do. I will definitely go over and check it out, I can’t wait to see what kind of bitter things you have to say!
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It is a shame, your animated gifs are too small. Can you work on that ? Cheers, Matt
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I’m just doing them the way WordPress is set up. They look fine when I do them there. Not sure how to fix them. Sorry they come up so small for you.
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Thanks for the like on At Any Length. I will say that based on the likes you have, you really have nothing to be bitter about.
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I have all kinds of things to be bitter about. Just not the likes.
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Your idea is great really and am not saying this bitterly ! Thanks for recent like on my post. It does make my day to see a “Like”.
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Glad you like my cartoon. Thanks for visiting!
Ciao…
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No trouble. I always enjoy cartoons.
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Nope I’m not listening. And yest traffic is exhausting.
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Hello Mr. Bitter Ben. I can see that you are a busy man. Your fame and notoriety precede you and one day, I aspire to be half the man you already are.
I offer this shameless brown-nosing to let you know I nominated you for a Liebster. I realize that you are a 2015 Bloggie winner and a Freshly Pressed god, so in the grand scheme of things, all I am offering is another trinket to clutter your over-burdened trophy case.
Simply put, I listed your site on mine at (http://www.hermansneutics.com/?p=695). You are welcome to grace us with your appearance, but I know that world-famous bloggies have a lot going on. You need do nothing, but if you would like the benefits that come from clever award-driven networking, you can do just what I did and tell the world about your favorite blogs (which you seem to have done at least once before).
I leave the same way I came in, prostrate and face down in the presence of a legend.
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I have nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award
https://mymiddlenameissarcasm.wordpress.com/2015/06/17/the-versatile-blogger-award/
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I plan on selling the award on Ebay to get a new top hat. I hope the ceremony isn’t too long, cause I have a couch to get to!
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Really? I see you as more of a fedora kinda guy. To each his own.
You already missed the ceremony, it was just me eating a big bowl of vanilla ice cream with melted peanut butter on top. You didn’t miss much.
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Ughh…a fedora? Now you’re just intentionally trying to make me bitter. I’m the last thing from being a hipster.
I did miss much. The ice cream.
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I’m too old to know what a hipster is…that makes me bitter.
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It’s basically someone that rebels by dressing like they live in a dumpster and eating food that only cows would eat.
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Thank you so much. I’ll sleep better now!
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And I will sleep bitter now.
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I tagged you in the love-hate challenge…mostly because I wanted to hear 10 things you loved 🙂 Feel free to participate if you so choose! Have a lovely day!
https://myblogismyboyfriend.wordpress.com/2015/06/03/love-hate-challenge/
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Now that is funny. I am going on vacation soon, but if I still remember after that is over, I might do it. Just know I have a bad memory.
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Haha no problem. Maybe you’ll find all kinds of things to not be bitter about on vacation!
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And more kinds of things to be bitter about.
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Probably.
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I don’t know if nominations are permitted in your blog, but here you go 😛 https://babysteps22.wordpress.com/2015/06/02/premio-dardosno-im-not-cursing-you/
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I accept nominations, but I never do them on my blog. Though I may someday do a megapost with all the people who have nominated me. But probably not because I’m pretty lazy. Thanks for the nom anyways!
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Hi, I wanted to thank you for liking my post’ Go ahead, offend me!’ I really appreciate it! 🙂
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How could I not want to read a post about getting offended!
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Ha, ha! Yeah, I couldn’t agree with you more. Thanks again. 🙂
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I’m also really good at offending people.
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It’s a good talent to have, sometimes. For me at least. 🙂
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It’s especially good for keeping people away from me.
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Okay, so I FINALLY finished my guest post for June. Where can I send it? I’m pretty sure you gave me your e-mail, but I’m also pretty sure I’m an idiot who went and lost it. Let me know where to sent it. Thanks.
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Awesome thanks! The email is bengardner2000@gmail.com.
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Thanks for stopping by my blog. I’m enjoying reading your posts, although I’m quite bitter about it!😡(I thought that might make you feel better)
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You should be bitter. Any other time you are feeling bitter, stop on by and leave even more bitter remarks or rants. That’s what its all about around here.
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I’m glad to find another curmudgeon in internet-world. Thanks for liking my Andy Kaufman tribute. I will definitely be back for more bitterness. J.
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Yeah, hard to believe there aren’t more of us out there. Too many happy blogs around. Needed to bitter it up!
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Your blog is fantastic!
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It’s a lot more fun than work, that’s for sure.
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Ben! I really enjoy your blog so I nominated you for an award 🙂 Please don’t feel obligated to do anything with it, but if you’d like to, you can guarantee I’ll read it on your blog! https://mindykdickerson.wordpress.com/2015/05/08/inspirational-blogger-award/
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Well, I can’t imagine anyone getting inspiration from me, but I will surely accept the award. Maybe someday I will do a Mega post on all the people that have nominated me for awards, but probably not, because I’m too lazy. Thanks again for the nomination!
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Sometimes I do the awards, and sometimes I don’t but I’m always grateful, like you too! You inspire me to include more bitterness in my day!
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Don’t get me wrong, I love being recognized for how great I am. I just don’t like all the work I would have to go through to accept one. HA.
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You and me both!
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That’s why all these creepster things keep happening to you. Because no one can handle being within your greatness bubble.
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Hahaha well, I don’t know about that.
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Either that or you have some sort of douchebag attractant.
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That is highly possible.
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Perhaps you need to switch perfumes.
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Pingback: Inspirational Blogger Award | yellow.fever.
Dearest Bitter Ben, I have nominated you for The One Lovely Blog Award (There wasn’t an award for bitterness, sorry!). I bet you are quivering with excitement… or perhaps you might be hitting your head against a wall repeating the phrase “Not another award, not another award!” You don’t have to accept this award, but I would love for you to pop over to my blog and come celebrate! There will be imaginary champagne, disco balls and a drumming cat! What more could one want? Hehe. . If you’re interested click on the link: https://insidethelifeofmoi.wordpress.com/2015/04/29/my-big-fat-award-ceremonystrike-two/
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Dearest Amanda,
You are so kind as to nominate me for the lovely blog, as I think this may be my most awarded one. I do appreciate the fact that you did nominate me. I will be getting my tux rented out and be over the awards ceremony as soon as I can afford tickets! Actually I was about to start reading when I did get this comment letting me know. Funny how that works. Anyways, you must spend so much time organizing this party, that you must be exhausted. Take a little nap on the couch I and I can’t wait read all about it!
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I really must file a complaint. Your post left me laughing instead of bitter! This is intolerable! Laughing can never be better than bitter! You promised me….!
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I’m really sorry about that. It must have been unintentional. I will figure out a better way to make you bitter.
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Thank you very much for your consideration and help, sir! 😉
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You know me. Always there to disappoint.
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Lol, we seem to have desteny .
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Yes, according to the Jedi, I am on the bitter side, the third side of the triforce.
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🙂
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Like it or not, you’ve been nominated for The Versatile Blogger Award. nyinstant.wordpress.com/2015/04/21/eat-your-heart-out/
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I’m so honored. How can I express how much I can’t wait to go to the awards.
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My apologies for the misunderstanding. This was not supposed to be an honor. I figured you might need to buy a new tuxedo for the ceremony and would be really bitter about that. Either way, you’re welcome.
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Oh good, I was worried that people would think that I earned something.
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Well, I’m glad we cleared that up.
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Stanley has a new goal to cure you of your bitterness!
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He’s got an uphill battle. I’ve got 500 posts and growing. And a lifetimes worth of bitter experience.
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Just stopping by to say thanks for the visit over at my blog. I’m really enjoying the posts on yours, too. 🙂
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Always looking out for new blogs!
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Hi Ben,
I have a feeling you will like my Dad blog. It is rife with snark and bitterness.
Stay bitter, brother.
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If there is any bitter in the world I will seek it out. Like Superman, but not the Bizzaro version, the bitter version.
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Thank you for liking my poem Awesome on my blog, WordMusic. It was one I just had to get off my chest before I turned bitter. ha ha.
Brent Kincaid
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I hate this blog so much, Ben. I hope you’re happy.
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Join the crowd. My parents, wife and kids hate it too. And Obama, he hates it so much, he doesn’t even read it anymore.
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I don’t know why, but I feel like that’s not too hard of a burden to bear 😉
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It is, but I will bear it for the sake of the nation. And be bitter about it.
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Carry on then!
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After looking through your blog for a couple of days I kowtow to the best of bitter. I am not worthy and since I can no longer lead I will follow.
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There is room in the world for all kinds of bitter. Mine is just superfocused on the kind that doesn’t really matter.
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Thank you for checking out my blog. I will take some time to see what yours is all about too.
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It’s nice to see someone who tries to not be bitter about things, unlike me.
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Thanks! I have spent way too much time being bitter and complaining about life. Finally decided to make a change.
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Unfortunately, I’m always thinking about bitterness.
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Keep up the bitterness, it all looks terribly entertaining 🙂
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I will keep it up as long as I’m still standing or sitting on the couch, or in traffic.
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Thanks for dropping by https://wdfyfe.wordpress.com/ I’m been hunting through your blog. My goodness, you are bitter and incredibly funny also.
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Be careful hunting through this blog. And inordinate amount of bitterness can be found and once it gets you, it holds you in its trap. I’ve been stuck in here three years now and can’t out! Heeeelp!
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Thanks for stopping by my site TweedTypewriter and liking a post, much appreciated. And great GIFS all around here!
Given your taste for bitterness, you might also appreciate the story of these folks, The Scowl So-Sigh-Ety: http://tweedtypewriter.com/2013/07/29/the-scowl-so-sigh-ety/
Enjoy in good bitterness.
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I always enjoy a bitter tale. I get around to viewing that one sometime.
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Mind if I complain?
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Complain all you want. This is a safe place for complaining and being bitter.
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Here you go then,
I liked the way you shared the back story of this blog, but some pictures would’ve been great.
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I will possibly add some pictures later. I have tons of pictures and gifs on my posts though.
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Pingback: Oops, I’m a Finalist | CUPID OR CATS
Thanks. I didn’t even know I was nominated until you linked this to me. I’m kind of surprised I made Blog of the year category when I was trying for yours. I guess I’m always bitter about something. Have you seen the others in the category? Almost all of them are super serious or like blogs that are bloggie veterans. So little chance…
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I am just stopping by to let you know that I have nominated you for One Lovely Blogger Award!! LOL I can’t stop laughing! You really do have a great blog though, but its still funny!! 🙂 https://mamalisa4.wordpress.com/2015/02/26/one-lovely-blog-award/
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Thanks, Lisa. I will have to add this to my awards that I don’t deserve list, just so you can see it on my blog and make lots of fun of me.
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LOL You don’t have to post the award if you don’t want to, but its still funny 🙂
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I probably will at some point. I need to update that awards page on my blog anyways. No time like the present.
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Wrote this with your blog in mind. 🙂 http://petedeakon.com/2015/02/04/through-his-eyes/
Pete
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I’m so dishonored by your thinking of me as dispiration for your blog post.
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This blog has a singular-ness that is unforgettable you bitter, bitter man.
Pete
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I know right? It’s like the anti-happiness blog. Happy people may enter, and leave happy, but certainly not unscathed.
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