Greetings Bitter People of the Internet Blogosphere. Bitter Ben here from First World Problemia. I have a complaining-about-first-world-problems problem and people at work started noticing so they started calling me Bitter Ben. A long time ago, I learned in marketing that you should find a need and fill it. I started noticing that a lot of people like to complain about little things, but they felt ashamed to do it, because they felt like they were being petty. So I came up with the idea to start a 900 line (1-900-BITR-BEN), where people could call and complain about all the little things that drove them crazy, but the twist was that the Customer Service Rep could also complain back. This would not only allow all the complainers to get it out of their systems, but the call would be longer and I would get more money. This lead me to come up with my tag line, “We make bitter better.” That idea failed because of a number of reasons, so instead I did the next best thing. Start a blog with the same mission. For free. For now. But someday, you will be eating in Bitter Themed Restaurants, reading Bitter themed novels, and wearing bitter oversized T-shirts. Everytime you hear someone say bitter you will think of me or this blog and you will pay a fee just for thinking about it.
So for now, jump into this safe bitter filled environment, where you are free to complain as bitterly as you like. No matter how petty, all bitterness is free to roam these wide open bitter halls, or meadows if you prefer. Comment the heck out of every post, because you can be sure I will comment right back with more bitterness. Let’s “Make Bitter Better”.
Bitter Ben
A picture of the real Bitter Me.
Some Bitter Posts to get you started:
The two posts that miraculously got Freshly Pressed:
Some other Popular Bitter Posts:
And a few of my Bitter Favorites:
Guardians of the Bendrameda Galaxy
The Four Chambers of my Bitter Heart
Surviving Work Disasters Bitterness
From the Bitter Benzoac Era to the Bitter Twitter Era
Don’t forget to follow the Bitterness elsewhere:
Credit to Michelle of Life as I Know It for this cartoon version of me.
Ben's Bitter Blog 
Thanks for visiting My Weary Mind and liking my post Two Day Off Work… 🙂
LikeLike
Ben I am not going to complain. I am going to stop by and thank you for taking a look and liking one of my current posts. I appreciate the time and effort to do so. Take care, and I do hope you get mostt of the bitterness out of yoru system. Take care, Bill
LikeLike
My bitterness is here to stay. It just gets remixed into different areas.
LikeLike
Hi Ben, Thanks for stopping by my blog–I felt compelled to answer so you didn’t send bitterness out into the world! All the best to you! Keep it coming and happy writing!
LikeLike
Sorry, but I will still be sending out bitterness to the world. It’s what I do.
LikeLike
This blog is awesomeness
LikeLike
If by awesomeness you mean bitterness, then yes.
LikeLike
Studies show that incessant complaining increases longevity. You sir, are awesome, and I wish you a long, bitter life ahead.
LikeLike
So now I have to keep living a long time? I think I will go eat a pizza so my bitter life is a little shorter.
LikeLike
It’s really hard for me to be bitter… I’m a “glass is half full” kind of lady….. Soooo… let’s be bitter about me not being bitter… ?
p.s. love the blog *insert cheesy smile here*
LikeLike
Being bitter about you not being bitter is a good start. If you hang out long enough you will find things to be bitter about that you never even imagined. I do all the work, you just need to read and find your inner bitterness.
LikeLike
Hey, Ben. Thanks for following Zen Crunch. Your “About” page made me laugh, so I’m following you. Now I have a blog to go with my bitter coffee. And the bitter beer.
LikeLike
as long as it is bitter it is welcome here.
LikeLike
Hi BB!
Thanks for stopping by and liking my “hyphy’d” post.
Love the idea of a 900# for the sole purpose of complaining. I would totally use it.
In fact, I’m bitter you never started it…
Nice to meet you!
Vanessa
LikeLike
If there was enough interest I would definitely try to figure out how to do something like that.
LikeLike
There has to be. People love to complain. I’m surprised it’s not yet an Olympic sport!
LikeLike
And I’m surprised I’m not a gold medalist!
LikeLike
{Hands Ben gold medal.}
I would have put it around your neck, but it’s the chocolate wrapped gold medal and I don’t have a flag and the national anthem soundtrack handy.
LikeLike
Most people would have wrapped it around my neck, so that shows what kind of nice person you are.
LikeLike
🙂
LikeLike
I’m new to this blogging thing, only two weeks old actually. I’m glad i found your bitterness so I know now that I’m not the only bitter one in the house !
LikeLike
It makes life so much bitter when you find other bloggers to complain to (or about). We can give you the much needed bitterspiration you need to keep writing every week and good subjects to write about. Stay on the bitter bandwagon!
LikeLike
yeah sure!
Thank you for the support 🙂
LikeLike
No trouble.
LikeLike
Ben, I’m pleased that you liked my post on “Swords, Specters, & Stuff.” You’re welcome back anytime!
LikeLike
I’m not sure you want me over. I mess up people’s lawsn. Mostly accidents.
LikeLike
Ben, I think you’ve been too upbeat lately so I’ve nominated you for the Sisterhood of the World Blogging Award (details at http://1writeway.com/2013/09/21/more-awards-more-mea-culpa/). Yes, I know this award is intended for female bloggers so I would thought it exponentially add to your bitterness if I nominated you for it. I made this nomination in the truest of bitter spirits 😉
LikeLike
I’ve played right into your hands. I will definitely be bitter about this one for a long time. My daughter tried to give me a crown once and I’m still not talking to her.
LikeLike
Oh, I a so glad 🙂
LikeLike
It’s bad enough to get an award, but to get an award for a woman’s award.
LikeLike
That was the point … heh heh heh …
LikeLike
So rude, but it made me bitter so I forgive you…not at all. Ha Ha Arrrgghhh
LikeLike
😉
LikeLike
Well, I’m not glad for your daughter, unless she had the same intent as I … To make you more bitter than you could hope to be 😉
LikeLike
She did have the same intent as you did. To make me bitter.
LikeLike
Power in numbers 🙂
LikeLike
Pingback: More Awards, More Mea Culpa | 1WriteWay
You actually get to be bitter without being labeled “the B word”. Nice!
LikeLike
I get called the B word all the time. Bitter, Ben, Blogger. Oh, you mean that other word.
LikeLike
I am so bitter it burns my tongue.
LikeLike
Whatever you do, don’t have anything sweet or it will cause a really bad reaction called being nice. Avoid that at all costs as It is toxic and will only cause more pain.
LikeLike
I think “We make bitter better.” is an awesome slogan.
LikeLike
Yeah and it was really hard to come up with. I was trying to think of a work that sounded like bitter and butter was already taken.
LikeLike
Complain, complain, complain! But bitter-sweet.
LikeLike
Yes, having a blog to complain about things is what keeps me bitter.
LikeLike
Hey Benny, your new gravatar is a kind of masochistic 😛
LikeLike
It is the product of me not being able to figure out how to change it to the right way and it kind of fitting my bitter profile. You’re back! I haven’t seen you forever.
LikeLike
Thanks for liking my blog post. I’m really glad you did because that led me to find your blog, and I really like it. Only I’m bitter that I have never found it before. I guess that means this is the perfect place for me to be. I see what you did there. Oh no….now I’m bitter about your cleverness, too.
LikeLike
It’s the Pinewood Derby. All kinds of bitter things about that. Although getting last place on every run was quite bitterly satisfying.
LikeLike
Hi, Ben. Sorry this took me so long but thanks for stopping by dentaleggs. Are you free to talk about your teeth on my site? Please? No one else will.
Eva
LikeLike
I can’t understand why no one would want to talk about teeth. Sure, send me an email. I’ll talk….with my teeth. bengardner2000@gmail.com
LikeLike
Thanks. I can’t understand it either. Their loss. The interview has begun at your above email.
LikeLike
I will check it out at lunch, or dinner…or whenever I get to it…
LikeLike
I love complaining! I look forward to exchanging negative thoughts with you, us bitter types need to stick together!
LikeLike
Welcome to the complain fest. We do that all the time here. Feel free to complain anytime. Or don’t. Either way I’m bitter.
LikeLike
Like it Ben’ like it.
Complaining as a route to improvement was always my thing too at work. After two decades as a business author and IT specialist, I have stumbled into academic proof-reading over the past couple of years; it just seemed the right thing to do…. anyway, from my IT days, I was known as Dr Picky coz of my lack of tolerance with those who arsed about at work to the detriment of others. Rant over. Nice blog sir 🙂
LikeLike
Don’t worry about having to end rants around here. They are always welcome.
LikeLike
I like the way you’ve embraced your bitterness, Ben. Hopefully this blog helps you purge some of the bitterness from your system so that you don’t end up feeling quite so bitter! 🙂
LikeLike
I will always be bitter. The point of the blog is to share the bitterness with others.
LikeLike
How bitter-sweet of you to stop by CanITakeANapFirst? Keep spreading the bitter like butter.
LikeLike
Give me some toast and I will spread the bitterness.
LikeLike
Thanks so much for coming to visit my blog today, so I in turn could discover yours. Appreciating your bitterness and sarcasm. My son told me he did not like my blog today, I was too cynical and needed to be more positive. Don’t think I do. So glad I came here to get the positive negative reinforcement my sarcasm needed. 😉
LikeLike
Sarcasm and bitterness are necessary. Your family needs to understand it.
LikeLike
Hey Ben,
Hate to say this (no, I don’t really, it’s just an expression I’ve heard dad use when I know that he’s trying to be polite) but I only popped over for a read as, from the title, I thought this might be a blog about “The Best Beers In the World” or similar: http://appellationbeer.com/blog/why-bitter-may-be-good-for-you/
But sadly it’s not. So that’s one more complaint to add to your pile.
Have a pint on me, chill out and cheer up fella, sometimes bitter can be good, especially when you’re drinking it!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bitter_(beer)
LikeLike
I accidentally end up on the wrong blogs sometimes too. Sometimes I show up at happy blogs and leave as quickly as I can. Good luck finding the good blogs you are searching for.
LikeLike
Thanks for liking my “sandpaper days” post…seems you have them every day!
LikeLike
Every day is a sandpaper day.
LikeLike
Your bitterness is inspirational! In fact, I’m bitter that your better at being bitter!
LikeLike
It’s hard work being bitter and I’m a lazy guy, so you know how much I enjoy being bitter.
LikeLike
Hey there, I think your blog is fantastic, and I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award.
Check it out
http://escapingadaydream.wordpress.com/2013/08/28/the-versatile-blogger-award/
LikeLike
It’s actually pretty bitter. Are you sure you want to nominate it? I will tell blog and I’m sure it will pretty happy.
LikeLike
Yes Ben, I think your bitterness is worth spreading
LikeLike
Then let’s get it to go viral.
LikeLike
Thanks for liking my post – and though I’m trying to be bitter about it – I’m just really glad you stopped by!
LikeLike
I’m sorry you couldn’t be more bitter. Try harder next time please.
LikeLike
In keeping with all the fabulousness here, I feel like I should complain that you stopped by my blog, except that I’d rather say “thanks” instead. Does that make me non-bitter? Perhaps so. I’m glad that you brought a bit of bitterness into my life. 🙂 Oops! That probably should have been 😦
LikeLike
If I were you I would be pretty bitter, because now all kinds of negativity and bitterness is about to inhabit your blog. I’d say I’m sorry if I really was.
LikeLike
🙂 Well, my Pollyana-esque vibe could probably do with a little pessimism, you know, just to keep things interesting.
LikeLike
No, not a Pollyanna. I must inject some bitterness here. It is now my mission.
LikeLike
so, in a nice way bitterly, i got these awards…yeah.
http://lisajohnsonsawyer.com/2013/08/26/monday-monday/
in a matter of factly…i gave one to you. you can walk away. find a rock to hide. im jsut sayn…
great blog you have here.
LikeLike
Does this mean I get to go to the VMA’s and tell Miley Virus to disappear forever?
LikeLike
Please.
Or you can let her twerk you.
Your decision. But, I’d make sure she had one of those foam fingers.
I’d be scared.
LikeLike
Maybe she can be attacked by a bear.
LikeLike
Wasn’t she just born from one last night?
Or do they eat their own?
LikeLike
If she was a bear they would certainly eat her because that would be her only use.
LikeLike
Congratulations! I have nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. I hope you accept. ☺ Here is the link to my post: http://morningcoffeebliss.wordpress.com/2013/08/25/the-versatile-blogger-award/
LikeLike
It’s funny that I’m being nominated for versatility, since I always talk about bitterness…Thanks!
LikeLike
Lol! I guess you’re right. The topics you cover are pretty versatile though 🙂
LikeLike
Well, someday I will pass forward these awards, but it will be in a creative, bitter way. Thanks again!
LikeLike
Hi Ben, thanks for stopping by my blog! Was it bitter enough for you or do I have a way to go?? 😉 Linda.
LikeLike
Everyone has bitter potential. If you work hard at your laziness and develop a distaste for everything, you could achieve you dream of being the second best bitterperson in the world. Bitter luck!
LikeLike
A bitter thank you to you, sir!
LikeLike
Keep following you unrealistic dreams!
LikeLike
I just listed you in my latest blogroll. http://strawberryquicksand.wordpress.com/2013/08/21/its-blogroll-time-check-out-these-awesome-blogs-readers/ Be as bitter as you like. lol
LikeLike
It is about time I made the blogroll. How long have I been begging for this?
LikeLike
Have u? Lol.
LikeLike
Like at least 60 seconds now.
LikeLike
Hahahaha
LikeLike
You are just so quick.
LikeLike
I see. Your a community facilitator, like Ouchy Obama!
LikeLike
More and idea guy that has no business skills. And bitterly so.
LikeLike
I applaud your comittment … I feel much the same way about flippancy 🙂
LikeLike
You should always stick with what you are good at.
LikeLike
True. Or be bitter that you’re good at nothing. Or that the thing you’re good at and could do from your bed or a beach, doesn’t pay the rent. But then if you actually made a good living from being bitter, you might actually become so content that you’d no longer be good at being bitter. My friend, you are screwed. And that you can take to the bitter bank. I’ve learned a lot about bitterness in such a short span – potentially infectious. Your power is great.
LikeLike
It boggles the mind I know, but I have seen every bitter scenario. It always ends in bitterness, which is my goal.
LikeLike
Dammit … I haven’t got the attention span to be bitter which sucks because you make it sound like fun. I could be bitter about attention span … if I remembered. I’m the idiot who decides I’m never going to speak to someone again … only to turn around and start chatting two seconds later.
So glad you happened by my blog on.my nutkob stalked who, I can only assume, is very bitter. So maybe you’d like my stalked more than me? I’d be bitter about that but you’re to bloody hilarious 🙂
I always imagined very bitter people would be no fun at all. So it must be true about you doing bitter better.
LikeLike
Bitter is the only thing I do well, so I’m gonna be the best at it.
LikeLike
I couldn’t resist an opportunity to add to your bitterness. I’ve nominated you for both the 5 in 1 Award and the WordPress Family Award. If you want to participate, you can see how I mangled, I mean, managed the rules here: http://1writeway.com/2013/08/17/its-awards-time-again/. Participation is not required. I’m just sharing the love that you bitterly detest 🙂
LikeLike
I would participate if I wasn’t so bitter and had any blog friends to share with and if I had a suit to wear to the event.
LikeLike
Maybe I can round up some blogger friends and buy you a suit through Kickstarter 😉
LikeLike
That would be great. Could you also do a Kickstarter for my Bitter T-shirt collection?
LikeLike
Give an inch, take a mile … sigh 😉
LikeLike
That is what the bitter always do.
LikeLike
lol
LikeLike
This blog is hilarious. I’m going to show it to my bitter friend once I’m done being bitter about it raining on my camping trip.
LikeLike
It will probably stop raining as soon as you have to work indoors and start right back up when you want to go to the beach. That would be Seattle 364 days a year.
LikeLike
I told the weather gods that I would find the enchanted sword of sunshine and personally cut off their heads if it didn’t stop raining. Apparently I intimidated them because it’s sunny today.
LikeLike
How can you be bitter if there is sunshine? Oh yeah, because it gets in your eyes and makes you sweat.
LikeLike
Oh. My. Gosh! I felt like that was a description of me! Love everything about this blog! I think I sort of just died laughing. Thanks so much for the follow. I’m following you and anxiously awaiting more bitterness!
LikeLike
You wanted to start a 900 number like me too? If you’ve got the financing, I think we should do it. I will split the profits with you 90/10. Because I’m generous enough to give you 10.
LikeLike
Hahaha well no, not that part. I just meant the bitterness in general, although I think that hotline is the funniest thing ever!
LikeLike
Dang I was hoping to sucker someone into financing that. Oh well, I can always be bitter about you on another blog post because of your lack of financing.
LikeLike
hahaha yeah as a broke kid who just graduated college and has been thrown into the rivers of a crappy economy, can’t help you there. Feel free to be bitter for the both of us! lol
LikeLike
I’m broke and bitter. So that will make for a power team of not getting this thing off the ground. Perhaps you could at least man the phones while I get someone else to pay for it?
LikeLike
hahaha I think I could “Man”age that. Yup, that just happened.
LikeLike
Terrible puns are my favorites. I am completely okay that just happened.
LikeLike
Hi! I nominated you for The Versatile Blogger Award. Please get the badge at http://wp.me/p32YrK-tN and get more info. Have a great Sunday. 🙂
LikeLike
When is the awards ceremony? I will have a bitter speech prepared.
LikeLike
You’re got the award so I guess you choose when. (laughs)
Love your style, man! Keep them coming. 🙂
LikeLike
I choose today, since I don’t feel like working.
LikeLike
http://grandmadrivesmecrazy.com/2013/07/31/three-cheers-for-versatility/
LikeLike
It is about time that somebody make a mistake about nominating me for an award.
LikeLike
I’ve thought an insult Starbucks would be a great idea. They’re already jerks, why not play it up, like Dick’s Last Resort? Everyone would be so happy, or miserable, or both. Thanks for liking my Detective post (true story) and for posting. I especially love those tweets over there>>>>!
LikeLike
There are tweets over there? I should go check them out and see if my writing team is any good.
LikeLike
Pingback: If Being Awesome Was a Crime, I’d Be Serving a Life Sentence | Imperfectly Perfect
Of course you had to take this one out of context.
LikeLike
Hey Ben! Just wanted to let you know that I added a new page to my blog, with a list of recommended blogs to read, and yours is on it. Please let me know if you’d like me to change any wording in the description.
http://freefunorinteresting.wordpress.com/rainy-day/
LikeLike
That is pretty spot on, except for the laugh part, and the fresh perspective.
LikeLike
I figured I’d give you one or two inaccuracies to be bitter about 😉
LikeLike
As long as they are bitter inaccuracies.
LikeLike
Oh, the bitterest!
LikeLike
Hi Ben! Thanks so much for checkin out my page. I always like finding other humorists on here whose material I can relate to 🙂 You’ve got my follow!
LikeLike
I gotta say that it is hard to find other humorists on WordPress that are actually funny. Yours is way better than most.
LikeLike
Bitterness has never been more entertaining. Your stuff is hilarious!
LikeLike
Bitterness is finally getting a prop. Sweetness must be so jealous.
LikeLike
Indeed. Very jealous.
LikeLike
Witty! Like a lot!
Chris
LikeLike
If by witty you mean bitter, then yes, very much so.
LikeLike
Cool. Aversion therapy for bitterness.
LikeLike
The more you read, the more complaining you will hear.
LikeLike
How freaking creative you are! I’m honored that you liked my blog post at http://www.kafkassister.com. Thank you and I look forward to all those bitter lemons becoming sweet lemon curd 🙂
Gayle
LikeLike
Creative in one way. How to be bitter about everything.
LikeLike