My wife and I were in charge of the decorating for our church Christmas party this last week, which means my wife was in charge and I helped. Let me tell you how hard it is to watch her wrap presents for a centerpiece, string up strands and more strands of stockings, wrap certain parts of the gym with wrapping paper, put up a backdrop, and so many other things to organize this blessed 1 and 1/2 hour event. I did help a little, but for some reason, my medication was throwing me for a loop and I kept getting dizzy spells and having to sit down so I didn’t faint. Some might call that good timing, but most people would call it really bad karma. I guess it was a little of each.
I did make up for it after the party when I helped with the teardown. I literally ran with loads of stuff in my hands to the van and shuttled 3 loads of stuff to and from the church to home 3 times. So, overall, the people of the church called it a success (the decorating, at least). The rest of the party was a disaster. The entertainment was pathetic, the food ran out early, and kids all wanted to go home before Santa even got there. So, the only success was my wife’s decorating. And my only success is these Bitter Friday Giftures…
It felt a little…
…like 40 little sideshows.
There were way too many of these weird…
…tiny human creatures there.
Lots of parents…
…were nowhere to be seen.
Some people were just too busy…
…cramming their pile holes with food.
Some people should not have been driving…
…inside the gym.
Some were a little too excited…
…to see Santa.
Some were dancing…
…even though there was no music or a dance floor.
Some like me…
…were having a little bit a struggle decorating.
Some people at the party…
…were treeted pretty badly.
Some people like me…
…wore the right attire…
While I should have worn…
…more of a pizza party attire.
In the end, with all the planning, preparation, and time we spent…
…it turned out exactly as we planned. A disaster. (Shout out to Die Hard as the Greatest Christmas Movie of All Time. I’ll fight you for that too!)
Not all parties you plan will be as successfully bad as ours was, but if you believe in yourself, work hard, and plan your best you can have the most memorably bad party as we just had. Get out there and do your worst!
Let me know all your worst party disaster memories!
ARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH
Bitter Party Planning Committee Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
This is the best way to do it.
LikeLike
I’m pretty sure if any of my neighbors did any sort of decorating that is what I would do.
LikeLike
Oh goodness, Ben–I’m so sorry you’re having issues with your medication–not funny at all, I know (and the more commercials I see about warnings and lawsuits re side effects, etc–the less meds I take). Anyway, I’m thinking of you–and your wife sounds like a lovely force to be reckoned with, I’d love to meet her!! May God bless you and your family as we careen/career through the holidays! 🙂
LikeLike
I think it is okay, but just like any drugs, you have those side effects. Luckily this one doesn’t have the side effect of death–that I know of. My wife is definitely a gem and I obviously don’t deserve her, but I’m sure glad she took me anyways!
LikeLike
Cheers to you both–and the kids!
LikeLike
My kids are going to need all of the cheers they can get. They have me as a dad!
LikeLike
Could be worse–they could be orphans.
LikeLike
Yeah, they should know that.
LikeLike