I have a daughter. You might not know that because I don’t mention her much. She is really shy with the media, so I don’t get to interview her very much. She is kind of elusive that way, so most of what you get on her is speculation from other media outlets and pictures that the paparazzi steal from her phone. I hope she will go into the media someday, i.e. take over the blog, but you do your kids a disservice if you force them to do what you do.
That means I might have to turn this blog over to some random media conglomerate someday, but when the bidding will probably enter into the billions, Disney will probably want it and will probably turn it into a blog for Grumpy or something. Sad.
Anyways, my daughter is into make up these days. She would probably kill me for mentioning it, so if I turn up dead tomorrow, you will know that her hitman took care of me.
Back to her make up. She is always using these make up terms. Stuff like eye shadow, mascara, blush, foundation, highlighting, countouring, eyebrows, eyelashes and concealer. I told her I have no idea what those things are and she rolled her eyes at me. At least I know what that is. She must have inhereted her eye rolls from me.
l feel bad for her already. She has to spend hours more than me getting ready every morning. I can’t remember the last time I cared how my eye lashes, eye brows (still don’t know the difference between those things) or how my lips looked. I haven’t even put Chapstick on my lips more than 5 times in my life.
We signed her up for a monthly makeup thing for Christmas, and she looks forward to it, like I used to look forward to my monthly Geek box, Loot Crate. I keep hearing her talking about how she got the wrong pallete of makeup or how this color doesn’t work for her skin type. When was the last time I had to worry about my skin type?
All I know is that you girls have to have some bitterness toward all this stuff. The expectation that you wear it, the cost of having to buy it, the amount of time it takes you to get ready every morning, or even the amount of time that men don’t notice it. Please tell me there is make up bitterness out there. I know as a non participator, I feel bitter because of it.
Lemme know, ladies. What are your beefs? And just in case you think I’m going to know what you are talking about, I won’t. But this blog is for beefing, so let it go, even if I will have no idea what you are talking about.
Bitter Make Up Ben