The OFFICIAL Guide to Crushing it at Your New Job

As part of my new weekly post called “Reblogging others to get better stats”, I am choosing one really good post from another blogger in order to assure that at least one post per week is good on my blog. Anyways, this post was particularly good because I am searching for a job and if I ever do get one, it will be nice to try and fail to do all these things in this post. Anyways, enjoy the only good post I put on my blog this week.

The Married Cat Lady

So, you got a new job– congratulations! Now, the question is, how do you go in and crush it? I’m here to tell you how in a few easy steps. Follow these steps, and you’ll be sure to kick some new-job ass.

crushing it STEP 1: Arrive early

I know, this one seems obvious. Of course, you don’t want to be late, but you need to beearlyearly, like sit-and-wait-in-your-car-for-twenty-minutes early, especially on your very first day.

This gives you plenty of time to increase your anxiety ten-fold. By the time you walk in the door, your hands should be shaking, and your stomach should be doing flip-flops.

If you feel like you may vomit, you’ve done it correctly.

STEP 2: Eat lunch alone

You had plenty of friends at your old job, right? Plenty of inside jokes and understood facial expressions? Well, not anymore!

You’ll eat lunch by yourself; simultaneously…

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