Bitter Skydiving Friday Giftures

Every Sunday night, we all collectively board a small plane, with a super loud propeller, and the wind screaming in our ears so we can hardly hear each other.  We are getting all kinds of instructions from some former skydiver who just wanted to surf his whole life, but realized that life costs money.  So he gives us all kinds of last minute instructions.  Make sure your parachute doesn’t have any holes.  Make sure your backpack is secure; don’t forget to write all your relatives a letter in case this all goes wrong, and then Monday comes and we all leap. For four days, we are free falling toward one massive cluster of meetings, phone calls, running into co-workers that we ignored and didn’t do work for, and bosses telling us we have to do stuff.  Then we finally pull the cord on the week and it is Friday.  We are floating down toward the ground, just hoping that a last minute tree doesn’t get in our way before landing safely on the ground of Saturday.  So while you are all floating down today, avoiding any last minute trees, here are some Bitter Friday Giftures to view while you try to avoid your co-workers with long branches and your tree boss.

Trying to go to work on Monday… get ready in the morning. going to be a struggle.


So try not to antagonize the boss…


…so they don’t chase you down for another new task.

Try to avoid getting hit…


… with an unexpected email.

Or try to open a document…


…that contains an unexpected virus.

Or trying to chase down…


…a valuable client.


Or experiencing an afternoon crash…


…where you just hit a wall.

When you are sitting in a meeting…


…just try to do your best to stay awake and not get any new jobs.


Because if you do get anything more..


…it will be hazardous to your health.


So do your best…


…to avoid your co-workers…

Because if you manage…


…to avoid the midweek pratfalls….

You might finally make it until Friday…



…where you accidentally nail it for once…

And you might finally get that…


… high five you have been craving.

Until we jump out of that plane again on Monday…


…and it all goes downhill again.

Well, hopefully you have a bitter weekend thinking about this vicious cycle I just put into your head.  Avoid the trees on your slacking float to tomorrow.


Bitter SkyDiving Ben





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