I see you none of you missed me on Wednesday. No one sent a get well soon card, a stuffed crust pepperoni, or a thermometer. Remember when I stayed up all night when your blog wasn’t feeling well and your computer had some sort of virus and you wanted me to watch it? Yeah, well I guess it doesn’t go both ways. Must be nice when you aren’t feeling well and someone acknowledges you. Don’t worry though, I’m not bitter. So yeah, not that you care, but I decided to take a sick day on Wednesday, not because I felt like staying home and being lazy (I would have preferred to be at work on Wednesday, because of other people’s kids), or because I was planning a Bitter Ben’s Day Off (Like Ferris Bueller’s but way more bitter) but because I was actually sick. The worst part of all, was that I had to take a sick day for actually being sick. Now I’m down to only 586 hours that I can use to guilt my co-workers into doing stuff for me. What makes me even more bitter is that all this real sickness prevented me from getting “fake” sick yesterday. You know, what us lazy people call a “long weekend”. Talk about a waste. In the meantime, I’m gonna leave these wasted gifs right here for everyone else that wasted a sick day, or forgot to send a stuffed crust.
Look at all the wasted…
…energy Star Wars People spend on their swords when they could have just used Jedi Mind tricks.
What a perfectly good waste…
…of a human this bike just threw off.
Talk about a waste…
…there was a perfectly good bowl of Cat Chow at home.
You wanna know what isn’t a waste?
…This gif.
Most Jedi swords are a waste…
…unless you include a corkscrew.
Besides Kayne singing upside down on the floor…
….biggest waste of the 40th Birthday.
Just wanted to remind my blog friends in the east coast and the Midwest to remember that you had this constantly this winter…
…while we had none.
I mean, I might as well have been…
…getting dogpiled this winter as warm as it was here.
But I’m sure you’re not mad...
…or vengeful.
I assume you aren’t going to tell me to have a nice trip..
…and see me in the fall….
Or get jealous…
…of my pool.
That’s good. So I won’t need to worry…
…about you killing me in my sleep, right? Cause that would just be a waste.
Speaking of waste, I’m glad I could do that to your time this morning. If there is any other way I can waste your time, please…hesitate to ask. There is definitely stupid questions and way stupider answers so feel free to not ask any questions, no matter how smart you think they are. And have a bitter weekend wasting away your life until you have to come right back here on Monday and read another bitter post. Unless, I’m sick in which you won’t care.
Make me your second place! (or first loser)
Remember to visit the Weblog Award Page and help me meet my goal of second place finish in the 2015 Weblog of the Year. A VOTE FOR ME WILL BE A WASTED VOTE FOR FIRST PLACE.
ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH
Bitter Waste of Time Ben