Bitter Eye Roll Friday Giftures

Annnddd....here we go.

Annnddd…commence eyeroll.

A bitter Friday to you, Bitter Stalkers (suggested name of the Bitter Blog followers by Insanitybytes22) out there! Earlier this week I tweeted a tweet about Eye Rolling and my Eye Rolling expertise:

I knew even way back earlier in the week, that eye rolling was destined to be the subject of this week’s Friday Giftures.  It’s like the God’s of Bitterness came down from on high to prepare this post for me.  It’s like the Marty McFly came from 1985 in his time machine to me in 2014 this very week of October just to tell me this post was my density.  It’s like all the greatest video game heroes and villains gathered on Mt. Olympus and battled for the prize of picking the subject of this post.  So epic…so amazing…so…

Eye Roll extrordinaire

Full of Crap.

This post is none of those things.  It’s just another Friday of Giftures.  Just like last Friday.

 

Oh my gosh, so cute, it’s her first time on a train…

...that's not the way EyeRoll.

…whatever.  Eye roll. 

 

Watch the miracle…

 

...by melon getting cut.  Eye roll.

...of melon getting cut. That’s not the only thing that should be cut. 

 

Wow, did you see the polar bear who could dribble a ball?

...Amazing. Eye roll.

…Guess what? I can dribble a ball too. Where’s my gif?

 

Look at this guy.  He is 7’8 and can dunk on a 10 foot hoop.

sdfdf

Well, guess what? I’m 41 years old and can take two steps without wheezing.  Have a candy bar, guy.

 

This guy can perform the amazing feat of walking on a tightrope 1000’s of feet above the ground…

sdfdsf

…and falling.  Call Guinness, cuz so can I. 

 

Look at this famous girl dancing…

sdfdf

…horribly. Get me an agent.  I can dance horribly too. 

 

Look at this person maneuver through tight spaces.

dfsdf

I can do that too.  I was born once.

 

It’s a miracle that this guy survived traffic this morning.

...I battle traffic everyday.

Here’s a medal. I battle traffic everyday.

 

Oh, look.  You forged a ring out of a coin.

blowmind2

Well guess what? I put a ring on it once too.  What do you want a raging volcano to throw it into? That’s so preeeeccccciiiouus.

 

Oh, nice.  Two elephants dancing together…

flkjsdlkf

I guess they are waiting for an invite to Dancing with the Pachyderms? 

 

Wow, what a face plant!

..could you do the weeding while you are down there?

Could you do some weeding while you’re down there?

 

And finally, watch these impressive people getting on a tall building and filming it with a pole…

sdfdf

…almost as impressive as me stepping on a Lego last night and my kid still being alive.

 

I’d like to spend all day recounting all my experiences with eye rolls, but then I wouldn’t get to do them in person and they are way more bitterly satisfying when you do them in person.  So I encourage you to get out there and experience so of your own bitter eye rolling experiences, not only today, but for the rest of the weekend.  Report any of your bitter eye roll inducing moments in the comments.

ARRRRRGGGGGHHHH

Bitter “This is the way Eye Roll” Ben

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34 thoughts on “Bitter Eye Roll Friday Giftures

  1. Ohhhhh, I’m pretty sure that was the queen Mamma of all face plants GIF. That’s gal’s gonna be weeding her own face for a week after that crunch. LOL. BTW, eye rolling is pretty much the chosen method of communication between my husband and I. We wouldn’t be able to communicate without it. Thanks for another great laugh!

    Like

  2. This post.
    There are so many things I want to say about it.

    The tightrope? Terrifying.
    The people on top of the building? Also terrifying, but I’m wondering if they’re feeling like they’re playing Assassin’s Creed in real life. O.o
    The faceplant was just . . . XD
    And I love elephants.

    I feel like there was something else to say. (Oh yeah! We were talking about time travel the other day!) I guess this is enough . . .

    Like

    • You are funny. I love how you have so many things to say about it, but then forget. I do that constantly.
      My dad likes Elephants too. He collected them over in Cambodia and Hong Kong when he went there. Whenever we see a figurine of some sort we always say that would be a great thing for dad! Speaking of which, they are coming soon. They are coming for Halloween. Have you seen your mom lately?

      Like

  3. Ben, actually I don’t roll my eyes–I have never done it in my entire life, because I hate it when I catch people doing it to me. Like my husband. He does it without even knowing he’s doing it, and sometimes tries to stop mid-roll or to hide it, which is even worse. Then I get very, very angry. Are you rolling your eyes right now? Stop it.

    Like

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