The longer I’ve been on this earth, the more mistakes I’ve made that I haven’t learned from. Now, I continue to make them at a more exponential rate. One of the things that people in general will never learn is that they can’t win. You may have seen lots of superhero movies or heartwarming tales of survival or romances that somehow happen, or other things that make you think that you can overcome and win in life. But there is one enemy that I am very familiar with that will always win. No matter how good you are inside, no matter how long of a Shawshank pipe you have to crawl through to get redemption on the other side, there is one enemy you will not defeat. I’d like to introduce you to the strongest enemy ever, Gravity.
Meet Gravity, the one that defies all your stupid quotes.
Okay, maybe this girl will defy gravity forever:
This guy didn’t even want to try to fight gravity.
Superheros, while trying hard to defy gravity, will just cause others to fall for it.
This girl knee-ded no help with gravity.
Some people just pretend to succumb to gravity.
Unlike humans, planes fight gravity with style.
One of gravities best friends are stairs.
Elephants never forget to work the gravity system.
Gravity never sleeps.
So, your demotivational speech for the day is “Just give up!” No matter how hard you try to fight it, gravity will win. You can try to delay it by exercizing, trying to learn how to fly, climbing mountains, and using those fancy knees that will eventually get replaced by metal, but you will not win. I for one, will welcome our enemy gravity by using the patented Bitter Ben method of inserting my body into a bitter old couch and do some LOLing(laying on leather). Gravity is a much more merciful overlord when you just give into it. So remember, fall 8 times, just stay on the ground.
Bitter Gravity Ben