I like to help people.
I did work. I did work that I didn’t get paid for. That’s right. I did a guest post. On someone else’s blog. Not on mine. So you’re telling me that is how all guest posts work? Ugggh. Anyways, I just wanted to make it clear that I did something out of the bitterness of my heart for someone else.
Oh don’t think I didn’t do it for myself though. I always have an ulterior motive, even when I don’t know what it is. And especially when no one else knows why. I may be bitter and not smart in a lot of ways, but I’m pretty tricky when it comes to gaming the system.
Actually, I’m really just good at gaming. And by gaming I don’t mean cards in casinos. That I am miserable at. No, I’m talking about confusing people, distracting people, and tricking people into talking about something else, so I don’t become the victim of the spotlight, or the FBI investigation. Are you thoroughly confused about what the heck is going on right now? Good because I am too.
So what I want you to do is this. Go to the link that I shall so bitterly provide, click on that link and read the post.
Link right here. Click it, click it right now!Â
I may have throngs of bitterly crazed maniacs with nothing better to do that be bitter, but this girl that asked me to do a guest post, doesn’t. And on top of that, she is way more talented than me, when it comes to existing, etc., especially when it comes to art, so like the post, follow the girls blog and start moving your bitterness to something productive for once (unlike me). Got it? Of course like my post first, then go over there and do all those things I instructed you to do. Oh and here is a shiny gif for making it all the way to the end of this post.
Bridges are funny.
ARRRRGGGGHHHHH
Bitter Guest Poser Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
Is it hard being so bitterly bitter all the time?? 🙂 Not even one day of sunshine and roses?? Thanks for keeping us grounded! Mel
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It is a tough job, but someone has to do it. I imagine it is hard being sunshiny all day too, but I wouldn’t know.
Thanks for trying to unground us.
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You sound like the perfect many for the job! Wishing you a bitter day from someone a bit more Pollyanna-ish! 😉
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I would be a pretty great set up man for helping you succeed. I hope that it works for you and I get paid a lot of money for helping you achieve your dream job.
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Post liked. Step One Complete. Moving to Step Two.
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Wow, someone finally listened to my directions. I didn’t think anyone even listened to me, let alone do something I ask. It’s probably because it is for someone else.
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Probably. Which is another thing to be bitter about.
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You know it. There is always something to be bitter about.
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I love your sense of humor. Your bitterness is pitch perfect. Maybe someday you can do a guest blog for me.
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I wish I could be in the movie Pitch Perfect. That would be awesome, but alas I can’t sing or act, so bitterness prevails and I am stuck being just a bitter blogger. As far as a guest post, I will do my mediumest.
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BEN! You got PAID for writing a blog post. Maybe you have in the past, but — either way — THAT IS FANTASTIC. Off to read the post now; in the meantime, CONGRATS.
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I got paid in Karma. I hope you like the post.
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I would ask you to do a guest post on my blog but then you’d leave my hanging, which is in turn is going to make me bitter, which is just propagating your agenda so no thank you very much. I am not going to ask. I will however like your post on your buddy’s blog.
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But the good part about me guest posting is that I bring all the bitters from my blog to yours. So it is definitely worth the risk to maybe have me do one. How do you feel about gambling?
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Well OK, if you insist. But it has to be your bitterest one ever. And preferably about chocolate. Or gambling. And you will remain forever indebted to me for doing a guest post on my blog.
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That’s just want I wanted. To be indebted to someone forever. But alas, I am always doing things that I shouldn’t and making hasty and rash decisions. So this one fits right in. It could be about chocolate, or more specifically Snickers.
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Yes let’s do it. Everyone needs a Snickers blog post on their life.
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Alright. I will start working on it with all my free time and get it to you in the next day or 300.
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Don’t leave me hangin or I’ll make you more bitter than you already are.
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I’ll leave you hanging in that I will probably do one, but you won’t know when.
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Sigh.
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That is a sigh of bitterness. I’m glad I could get you to that point.
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You mean I have to read you twice in one day?!!
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Yep, you do. But the good part is that you get to read other things from much nicer and less bitter on another blog. So you can just pretend you are reading something of hers.
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I posted a comment on Emily’s page and yes, I did follow her blog. Bitterly following her blog.
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Wow, someone actually listened to what I said. How bitter!
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Out of the bitterness of my heart, you get a like and your friend gets a follow.
Stay bitter!
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I will always stay bitter. And I read your post today about your boyfriend. Sounds like you have some reasons to be bitter too!
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**sigh**
Yep. Yep I do.
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Don’t worry, I will sigh for you.
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Evidently my thing is now the long suffering sigh. But thanks for the empathetic sighing on my behalf. It helps.
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I am quite good at the long suffering sigh, so I’m glad I could at least use my talent for something useful for once.
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“Bitter guest poser.” Dying! And you did get paid…in karma. Way tastier than cash…or is that caramel? I can never keep the two straight.
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I will take the Karma, but only if it leads to more bitterness. I will take the caramel.
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Boy, if I ever guest posted on someone else’s blog I know I’d be bitter. In fact, if I liked or commented on someone else’s blog I’d probably 1) be a disappointment or 2) be disappointed. I’m pretty sure disappointment is the root of bitterness, so my plant is well on the way, well watered by exhaustion’s tears and encouraged to produce O2 from my breathing out CO2-laced frustration profanity. It’s that, or they’re “the tears of a clown when there’s no one around,” and the hopeless, lifeless, irradiated remains of demolished dreams. Well, I’m commenting, so here’s to being # 1.
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I’m sure I would be bitter too. Oh wait…There are many things that lead to bitterness and I’m all for any of those things. I hope that someday, everyone will have a reason to be bitter, and in turn, turn to my blog for advice, bitter cookie recipes, etc.
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Wait, you have bitter cookie recipes?! Where!!??
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I run a bitter blog. I have bitter everything there. You just need to search really hard. Kind of like on the Deep Bitter Web.
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I’m bitter that you insist I do research. BITTER, BITTER, BITTER. I do enough research of my own curiosities (Ecclesiastes 1:18) that brings me bitterness, without having to nose around some blog searching for bitter cookies. Plus, I know what pfeffernusse are. Add a little too much pfeffer to the nusse and you’ve got some very bitter cookies. Betty Botter’s bitter batter’s got nothing on zweiback cookies with too much pfeffer. You can’t eat those because they’re too hard and then you can’t hold them in your mouth too long unless you like the bitter burn.
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I surely don’t have time to do research, especially when it comes to looking things up on my blog. I’m sure you can probably Google it or find some info in an encyclopedia. That’s where I go whenever I need to look up something really unimportant.
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